


Tip of the Iceberg

by KingBruja (Arborescent)



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Loooottaa fluff, M/M, Mei has depression/insomia/ptsd, Multi, TransJunkrat, as does Junkrat and Roadhog but they're a little more used to their stuff and try to help Mei out
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-22
Updated: 2016-08-28
Packaged: 2018-07-16 13:34:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 47,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7270336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arborescent/pseuds/KingBruja
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ever wonder about the dynamic between A Huge Dude That Can Probably Bench Press a Car, a Smaller but Equally Looming, Sharp Pointy Guy, and a Small Soft Darling Angel? Well no worries, here's the fic for you. </p><p>--</p><p>Mei-Ling Zhou, new to Overwatch and freshly thawed from her cryostasis, is faced with a barrage of issues and a whole new world to come to terms with. She finds herself questioning and desperately trying to reestablish her morals while she attempts to gather herself. Her patience is tested, as is her sanity as she discovers the new.... misfits that the organization she had once called family has made a habit of hiring. She can't deny they're handy in a pinch but can they please stop butting into her life?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Down the Rabbithole

**Author's Note:**

> Alrighty, folks!  
> Here it is! This absolute mess! Get ready y'all!
> 
> This is kinda set at a point where Mei is still fairly new to Overwatch, joining about the same time that the Junkers have been ushered in as mercenaries of sorts.

A scrape of the metal chair being pulled from the table is what startled Mei out of her slumped state. The book that she had been reading bumped off her thighs and sprawled to the floor.

“My apologies,” came the lilting voice of Mercy who stooped to pick up the book, straightening the pages with a delicate hand before setting it beside Mei’s arm on the dining table. She must have dozed off.

Mei tugged herself out of her groggy nap and yawned, slipping a hand under her glasses to rub at her eyes. “It’s okay, I don’t think I’ll be able to remember what I’ve read anyways.” She was prone to falling asleep often, something that Mercy had suggested was left over from the cryostasis. When she had told her, Mei had nodded, shrugged it off and told her she felt fine and that’s what mattered. But now Mercy was looking at her with a knit brow. Her mouth pursed up in exactly the way Mei had seen before she vaulted into a lecture about—

“Mei, as your friend I would like to offer some concern about your state. You haven’t been… well, completely alert and awake these past few days? I’ve seen you wandering our halls at 4 am or asleep by 12 pm.”

“Mercy, I’m fine.”

“Mei—“

“ _Angela,_ it’s nothing. Like you said, a left over state from the cryostasis. It should pass soon.”

Mercy’s jaw tightened, muscles working as she ground her teeth. Her bright blue eyes were locked on Mei’s pink face and Mei was doing all she could to avoid her. The stitching of her leggings had suddenly become very interesting.

“Mei, as your _doctor_ I am advising that you come to see me for a check up,” This wasn’t a suggestion, it was an order. Mercy had earned the nickname “mom” amongst the younger agents as a joke and Mei could see why now. Even though they were only apart by a few years, Mercy certainly set her foot in the role of fierce protector, “In the meantime, please,” Mercy’s stiff jaw had softened, along with the hardness in her eyes. She sat down in the chair she had pulled out and Mei met her gaze now, noting how much smaller she looked without her Valkyrie suit. She laid gentle fingers on Mei’s knee, concern running in the lines of her face. “Please remember to take care of yourself. We count on you.”

Mei curled her lips in and felt her cheeks heat up. She gave a short nod, moving to snag the book from the kitchen table and stood up. A little too quickly perhaps as she felt Mercy jerk away. She apologized to her silently as she walked away. Her vision was blurry.

 

\--

 

She hadn’t noticed just how late it was. She leafed through the pages of her book: a yellowing copy of _Alice in Wonderland._ Something that Tracer had shoved into her hands while they were sitting in the library together, remarking that Alice and Mei had quite a bit in common. She had meant it as a small joke, nothing more, but Mei’s knuckles were white as she held onto the volume after Tracer zipped off.

It was…. 1? 2 am? Mei padded through the halls of the base, running her fingers along the pages absentmindedly. She brought the worn spine to her nose to inhale the smell of crinkling, old pages. It wasn’t until she was met with something solid—too solid—and went crashing back towards the earth that she realized she had wandered too far into unfamiliar hallways of the base. Her glasses took a flying leap from her face, scattering onto the floor along with her book (for the second time). Before she hit the ground, a hand snagged her arm, plucking her up off the earth entirely in one swoop and she dangled there for a second. A mountain of a man stood before her. His hulking figure nearly blocked the entire hallway, his giant belly taking up the precious few feet between them.

The hand wrapped around her wrist—or rather, entire forearm, let her down slowly. She touched the ground with a soft gasp and immediately scrambled toward her glasses to remedy the blurry situation. When she found them she hastily shoved them back on her face.

Roadhog.

Mei hadn’t exactly met him “officially”. Rather she had just skirted around him, squeezed by and pressed herself flat against the walls whenever he would come around. He was large and intimidating. Not that she was scared of him, just that she didn’t exactly appreciate the amount of space he would leave her to exist in.

She brought her eyes to his face. He was still wearing his mask but his ponytail had been taken down, strands of white hair falling in soft waves around the hard leather. An impulsive thought of “ _touch_ ” skittered its way across her brain before she shoved it down. She cleared her throat, realizing she had spent a few good seconds staring at him and she was _sure_ that he had his eyes trained on her behind that thing he wore.

“Sorry, sorry, sorry,” she muttered, grasping for the book on the floor and clutching it to her chest.

Roadhog said nothing and it wasn’t until Mei was able to tear her eyes away from his face that she realized he had a rather large towel wrapped around his waist instead of his usual…. what _did_ he wear?

Mei went pink.

 ** _Who bathes at 2 am?_** Was the first thought that flitted through her mind before a loud crash and the sound of pitched grunts tumbled out from the doorway directly behind Roadhog.

“OI, ROADIE,” Came the holler and his companion crashed out of the light that spilled from the room. It was… Trashrodent? Garbagemouse?

“Junkrat,” came the low growl from the mask as Roadhog turned, a bite of annoyance accenting his words, “shut up.”

Mei’s gaze flitted from Roadhog to Junkrat whose figure was nearly blocked entirely by Roadhog’s bulkiness, her cheeks getting pinker by the second. It wasn’t until Roadhog turned completely that Mei realized: Junkrat was naked.

Steam billowed from him, his eyes burned with an intense emotion that Mei wasn’t sure she could pin and it was directed straight at Roadhog. Mei clapped a hand to her mouth and shot her eyes upward, hand hurriedly flicking her glasses up to make room for her fingers. “I-I-I’m sorry!” She stuttered, swinging around with her fingers still tightly covering her closed lids, “I really didn’t expect—“

There was sounds of a scuffle, a squeal and then silence. She was painfully aware of the presence of the men behind her.

“Y’can look now.”

Mei stood still for a few seconds more, only to cautiously pry her handfrom her face and turn as slowly as she could manage. Her gaze was directed to the ceiling. Really anywhere above waistline. Roadhog let out a soft grunt (a laugh maybe?) and Mei looked at him. He had his arm hooked firmly around an annoyed Junkrat who now was wrapped in a towel from the waist down, to Mei’s relief, and was staring intently at her.

“What’re you doing here?”

Mei took a second to answer, reveling in the oddness of the situation. Here was a clean Junkrat, something she had never seen before, trapped at the waist by Roadhog who was carrying him like a child might carry a teddy bear. Mei found her eyes lingering on his visage, mouth frozen open. His skin was a golden brown, tanned from the sun. However it seemed to lighten at his forearms and around his chest where she usually saw the soot lay the heaviest. Freckles dappled his skin in full, mostly concentrated around his shoulders and cheeks and where they grew sparse on his lower abdomen they were replaced with a spattering of moles. His blond hair actually looked blond, the singed edges now put out. His molten glare made her swallow thickly.

“Ah,”

“Lost.” Roadhog offered.

Mei felt her mouth twitch. It was weird hearing him talk. “Yes, lost. I fell asleep in the kitchen.” She turned her body part way to look behind her, expecting the hallway that lead straight to the living quarters but was met with an unfamiliar staircase. Just… where was she?

“Kitchen’s a long way from here, mate. We don’t usually go by those kinds in the day.” Junkrat jutted his chin out to her, “Which by that, I guess I mean y’r kind.”

“Kind?”

“Y’know, the goodies.”

Mei had no clue what he was talking about but nodded anyway. “I… fell asleep. I do that sometimes—” Junkrat snorted, she ignored it, “and I guess I was not fully awake because now I.. I don’t know where I am?” It was as much of a question as a plea for directions.

A small huff from Junkrat and he squirmed in Roadhog’s grip. The larger one seemed to take a hint because he removed his arm from Junkrat’s waist and let him drop. Mei almost had a conniption thinking that Junkrat would perhaps drop his towel for some godawful reason. But he balled the front of the cloth in his fist and held it near his belly.

“Kitchen’s thataway,” he jabbed a metal thumb over his shoulder, “was about t’go for a midnight snack.”

Junkrat turned on his heel and limped away, the unfamiliar clack of his peg leg echoing shortly through the halls. Mei stood frozen, staring after him. Roadhog’s mask was still trained on her. But after a second he jerked his head after the smaller man, signaling for her to follow.

  
Mei let out a shaky breath and pried her fingers from the edges of her book She waited till Roadhog had gathered the pile of clothes that had been dumped outside the doorway ( _Junkrat’s perhaps?_ ) of the bathroom and was a good few feet in front of her before slowly walking after them.


	2. Friends?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright y'all. I hurt my thumb real bad and won't be able to play Overwatch so I guess you'll see a lot of writing over the next few days!

The kitchen’s light wafted lazily over the edges of Roadhog as he stood in the doorway, his back to her. She stopped a decent distance away, staring at the way his shoulders drooped into the room. The way his breathing seemed to inflate him a few inches (maybe even feet) every time he inhaled. Her skin prickled at the memory of his entire hand covering her forearm.

Roadhog turned slightly, mask pointed at her. He nodded towards the kitchen again and stepped out of the doorway to allow her in. Mei groaned internally wanting nothing more than to be comfortable in her bed, covers pulled up over her head and pillows enfolding her. But instead she tentatively made her way into the kitchen.

Junkrat had a skewed definition of “snack” to say in the least. Mounds of food was piled up in front of him, his face alight with glee as he reached forward to grab the biggest slice of cake out from the depths of the heap. He froze when Roadhog grunted at him and shook his head.

“Aw, but Hog—” another shake of the head and Junkrat scowled, setting the slice back down. Roadhog shuffled forward, reaching for a few cups of instant ramen that teetered on the edge of the foodpile.

“Sweets don’t come first,” he growled. He tossed the pile of clothes he had been holding at Junkrat who grumbled in irritation and picked through the articles until he found his pants. Mei did an about face, her head swiveling to get away from the threat of seeing a naked Junkrat twice in one night.

Roadhog’s lumbering form turned towards the kitchen sink to fill the small cups with water. Mei scrunched her nose, watching him amble towards the microwave.

 **_Was that all they ate?_ ** She found herself shuddering at the thought. Microwaved instant ramen at any hour wasn’t the healthiest. Her concern chewed at her. It tugged her forward with a small voice of **_they just need some help this once_ ** and against her better judgement she took a couple steps toward Roadhog. Junkrat's eyes snapped to her with the movement. There was a wariness that trained his gaze and she put up her hands as if pacifying a rabid animal. Her book was still clutched in her fingers so she set it on the counter as if putting down a potential weapon.

“Wait,” she began, taking a shy step towards Roadhog, “is that all you're having?”

Roadhog stayed silent, mask facing her. A chill scurried down her spine.

“Never learned how to cook,” Junkrat answered after what felt like an eternity of staring, “me n’ the big lug don’t really get much of free time to do things like that.” A jingling of metal told her that he was buckling his belt as he spoke.

Mei reached to the cups of ramen, her gaze locking with the blank sheets of glass that covered Roadhog’s eyes. He grunted and lowered the cups into her hands, stepping back a few paces to let her commandeer the kitchen.

Mei felt her hands shaking and briefly questioned herself as to just _why_ she was doing this for them. But she shook her head and instead busied herself with finding a pot and and filling it with a bit of water. She clicked the stove on, setting the pot down she moved to the fridge and bent down into the abundance of food. It was a communal kitchen, which meant that anything was up for grabs, as long as it got replaced. Green onions, freshly picked from the garden Winston kept out back, some garlic, a couple eggs along with a few more things she deemed reasonable to put in a soup. She grabbed a jar of chicken stock but when she turned, Roadhog shook his head with a low growl.

“Vegetarian, mate. Me n’ Hog don’t really eat much of that. Not that I wouldn't love to but I can’t stand doing that to ol’ Roadie here.”

Mei blinked and turned, setting the jar down and instead grabbing a small tupperware of leftover Miso paste. She was surprised, to say in the least but complied easily. She had had an image in her head: Junkrat and Roadhog tearing delightfully into a mound of assorted meats but with the new information it was quickly replaced with veggies. She giggled at the thought. Junkrat threw a questioning look to Roadhog. Roadhog shrugged.

A couple spoonfuls of the paste plopped easily into the boiling water, along with the chopped additions. The cups of ramen after those, noodles sliding from their styrofoam packaging and bobbing in the water. From the freezer Mei snagged some broccoli and green beans and dumped them into a pasta strainer. She set that in the mouth of the pot. She covered the whole thing with a lid and turned. Junkrat and Roadhog were still staring.

She could feel her cheeks heating up for the millionth time that day and whipped back around, busying herself with snagging some of the dishes laying around and putting them into the sink. It was deathly quiet in the kitchen save the muted rattling of metal against metal and the pleasant rumbling of boiling water

Mei stood over the sink for a good ten minutes, pink and sweating, lost in a train of thought that took her far from the kitchen. It wasn't till Junkrat spoke that she jumped, remembering where she was.

“Hoi, isn’t that about ready?”

Mei dove for the stove, turning off the heat and snatching the lid off the pot. Steam billowed directly into her face, fogging her glasses. She had always hated that. She snagged them off and set them aside to keep working. She carefully raised the steamed veggies out of the pot. They looked a little soft. _Darn._ She snagged the eggs and cracked them into the simmering broth, watching as the whitened and drifted apart, bubbling a bit in the heat.

Junkrat inhaled deeply behind her. She nearly shot a foot into the air and he gave a high laugh.

“Smells delicious! Kinda like that time we visited that lil shop in Tokyo, eh Hog?”

Roadhog said nothing.

“Eh, he remembers.” Junkrat shrugged a bit and leaned in, looking into the pot with an excited stare.

“It’s-- it’s ready,” Mei stuttered, placing her glasses back on her face. She reached to open the cabinets. She had always hated just how high they were, but then again not everyone was as short as her. Torbjörn had complained so much that Mercy bought him a stepladder as a joke. Tracer had laughed so hard at that she fell off her chair and Torbjörn grumbled, staring at it with distaste. But Mei had seen him using it to grab a few cups from the top shelves when no one was in the kitchen. But Mei wasn’t going to embarrass herself quite yet and gave a little hop, furrowing her brow when her fingers only brushed the edges of the dishes.

Junkrat seemed to get what she was aiming for, her small jumps not giving her nearly enough height to reach the bowls. He moved behind her, grabbed the entire stack from the cabinet and set them down.

Mei could feel the heat that radiated from him. She wasn't sure if her temperature spiked because of the warmth she was steeping in or from her own embarrassment but she suddenly felt unbearably warm.

“ _Xié xié,_ ” she muttered, reaching for a ladle and one of the bowls. She spooned some in and turned to plop it into Junkrat’s waiting hands. He didn't seem to care that the bowl was burning hot and limped back to the table to slide it in front of a now sitting Roadhog who had apparently cleared the table of the mound of food and set a few utensils out for them.

When she gave him the second bowl he came back as if waiting for another.

“You gotta have some with us, chef.” He nodded towards the table and it was then that Mei noticed there had been three places set. Her heart sped up a little, a tiny smile tugging at her lips. That was a sweet gesture. So she grabbed a bowl, poured the rest in and gave it to Junkrat. The strainer of steamed vegetables was set in the middle of all three and Mei took her place at the table.

Junkrat immediately dove in, spearing a few veggies with his spoon and dropping them into his soup before diving headfirst. The spoon suddenly forgotten as he guzzled down the soup. Mei could've sworn he would have eaten the bowl entirely if he could. Roadhog scooped a few veggies but preferred to munch on them them separately and Mei stared in amazement as he unbuckled the two bottom straps and lift the mask just a bit to bite into the broccoli with a sort of care Mei didn't guess he would have possessed.

His jaw was smooth, patterned by stubble that was just as white as his hair, the thick muscles working slowly as he savored the food. His bottom lip was stretched over two rather large teeth--tusks, more like--that jutted out from his lower jaw. He stopped mid bite and inched his mask towards her face, noticing her staring. She swallowed, flicking her eyes from his mouth to his eyes and down to her bowl. She wasn’t very hungry and her mouth was suddenly begging for water.

Junkrat seemed to sense her discomfort because he looked at her and the Roadhog. “I wouldn’t stare at him while he’s eating, mate. He’s a real territorial one, him. Nearly took m’head clean off one time. Only wanted a bite of his dish, but nah. Right, Roadie?”

Mei’s face felt like it was going to melt off from the intensity of Roadhog’s stare. She kept her head down, strands of hair threatening to fall into her meal she was dipped so low.

Roadhog had taken up a defensive position around his nearly empty bowl of soup. Both his massive arms were parallel on the table, spoon still clutched in his left hand. He was squeezing the metal so hard that Mei could see the spoon begin to bend. She swallowed, suddenly cold with fear.

These men were dangerous. Criminals that had taken up with Overwatch in its time of need. Mercenaries, she was sure. They didn't seem the type to take a job without pay.

Roadhog stood abruptly, his belly knocking the table a good few inches off the ground. Mei and Junkrat had to scramble to snatch their bowls of soup before they slid off the edge and Junkrat looked rightly pissed.

“Whassa big deal, Hog?” He snarled, placing his empty bowl down on the table when it had steadied.

Roadhog’s mask never budged from Mei’s direction and Mei never looked up.

“Let’s go.”

“Now? But--”

“Junkrat.”

“Yeah, yeah. Alright.” Junkrat stood, gathering the rest of his gear, “g’night.”

Mei nodded, making sure to keep her gaze glued to the dark wood of the kitchen table. She felt Roadhog’s stare burn into her and it wasn’t until the heavy stomps and light clacking of their footsteps faded down the hall that she sucked in a few shaky breaths, unaware that he had seemed to suck the air straight from her chest.

  
**_What the hell was his problem?_ **


	3. Recall and Distress

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We'll get into confusion about feelings soon, I promise.

Junkrat dashed after the hulking figure of Roadhog. Each of his companion’s steps were deliberately made, crashing into the tiled walkways with a forcefulness that suggested a muted anger. Junkrat’s suspicions were confirmed when Roadhog stopped outside the door of their shared room, breathing a heavy purr under the mask. His fists were clenching and unclenching, muscles roping taught then relaxing. Junkrat stepped warily to the side of Roadhog, his amber gaze regarding the slick leather of his mask.

“Hog?” He murmured, reaching out to skim over Roadhog’s forearm.

The larger man gave a nasty snarl, a low metallic rumble that emitted not only from behind the mask but simultaneously from his chest, like something feral lurked there. Junkrat stumbled backwards a bit, the ferocity twinged an upset feeling in his stomach and pushed him off balance in surprise. Roadhog grasped the doorknob, ridiculously small between his fingers, and wrenched the door open. He squeezed through the door frame, the poor slab of wood protesting loudly. Junkrat made sure to close it gently, patting it as though to say _sorry, bucko._

He never took his eyes off Roadhog who now sat at the edge of the bed, still balling his fists up periodically.

“Roadie, are you alright, mate?”

“She stared at me.”

“Well-- Yeah, can’t blame her you’re a handsome enough fella.” A grin stretched over Junkrat’s features and he sniggered, his golden cap glinting in the dim light of the moon.

“Shut up.”

Junkrat’s laughter petered out as he moved ever so cautiously closer to Roadhog.

“Everyone stares. I mean you can’t blame ‘em. It was innocent, I reckon.”

“I don’t want _her_ staring at me. Like I’m some sort of _freak._ ” The last word was punched at the ‘k’, a low growl underlining his distaste.

“Mate, I donno what t’tell ya. We’re a bunch of freaks n’ misfits ‘round these parts.”

Roadhog reached back to unbuckle the lower straps of his mask, letting them fall heavily to the sides of his face. “Go to bed,” was the final order before he leaned forward, clicking the light off. He could hear the faint clacking sound of Roadhog removing his mask and then a duller thump as it hit the table beside the bed.

Junkrat shrugged, setting the pile of clothing he had been carrying down on a nearby chair. A heavy thunk caught his attention and since he didn’t remember stuffing any surprises into the pockets of anything, he turned back. The item was washed a soft, silvery gray the moonlight that shone through the skylight. Golden lettering gleamed across a worn cover: _Alice in Wonderland._ Junkrat blinked, staring at it for a good minute trying to remember if he had accidentally picked it up from the kitchen? Wasn’t the girl carrying something?

He swooped down to pick it up, running a calloused thumb over the threads of the spine, bringing it to his nose to breathe in the musty smell. He hobbled over to his side of the bed, leaving the book on the dinky, stained nightstand that crumbled into the side of the wall. He took a moment to stretch and then hefted himself onto the edge of the bed and leaned down to unclip his prosthetic from his leg. It fell with a thunk and he felt Roadhog shift behind him. He unwrapped the stub of his thigh, taking delicate care as it unraveled from his skin. His arm came next. First the hand unscrewed and clicked from the magnetic chamber with a small hiss. It didn’t come off all the way, a thick wiry cord ran through the hollow of the thick cylinder of his prosthetic, connecting all the funky bits and pieces that ran straight into his nerves. He flexed, the disconnected fingers twitching ever so slightly. Next came the forearm itself. He hooked a hand under the guard of the thick metal and grunted, pulling it off, free. The feeling of his arm stayed, as it always did. He didn’t mind it anymore but it used to creep him out when he’d reach for something and find that touched it with invisible fingers.

With a heavy sigh, he relaxed back into the bed. Perhaps not the softest of things but when you’ve spent most of your life in the outbacks of a ruined wasteland you called home, an actual bed was a gift from above.

“Roadie,” Junkrat began. Roadhog shifted again, turning slightly towards him. The broad width of his back tilted and in the moonlight Junkrat could catch the silver reflecting off Roadhog’s hair. It made him shiver. “Why’d she do that for us? Y’think she likes us?”

Roadhog growled, the sound a bit foreign to Junkrat’s ears. His voice was still low but the harsh grind of his mask was gone, leaving Roadhog with smoother tone. He made a point to turn back to his side roughly.

“Go to bed, Jamison.”

“I think she likes us.” Junkrat muttered, pushing his back flat against Roadhog’s.

 

\-- -- --

 

Mei awoke to dim walls. Despite having fallen asleep at 3 am she woke only a few hours later, the light of the sunrise washing her room in warm strokes. She rolled over, shoving the covers off her torso and gave a small stretch.

It wasn’t until Snowball gave a few small beeps from their charging station that she suddenly remembered why her eyes felt like they were begging for sleep. She bolted upright in bed, eyes wide.

The Junkers.

A thick feeling of regret, fear and disgust settled in the pit of her stomach and she groaned. Had she made them _dinner?_

Mei tugged the blankets aside, pushing past a plethora of feathery pillows and sinking her toes into the shag carpet that stretched over her floor. She didn’t much like the feeling of the slick wood floors in the morning and remedied it with the fluffiest carpet she could find. She dragged her feet through it now, making her way to the bathroom.

The memories of last night came back in sharpened images, most of it muddled by exhaustion but some of it…

Roadhog’s mask stood out, more in focus than anything. The way the shadowed eyes seemed to never leave her face. She found herself lingering on one memory in particular; Roadhog’s lips, plump and stretched over the tusks of jutting teeth, his jaw thick and unforgiving as he bit into the crunchy vegetable. The rage that seeped from him when he caught her staring.

She swallowed, feeling cold.

Snowball beeped again, in question this time and she waved a hand at them. "< _Everything is alright >"_ she assured in quick chinese. Snowball blipped in a way that said _I don’t believe you_ but fell quiet and nestled back into its charging station.

She washed her face, running the warm water over her hands for a moment as she lost herself in thought.

 **_Where did they come from?_ ** Was the thought that echoed foremost in her mind. Besides the obvious, Australia, she thought of how they might’ve come to be amongst some of the brightest minds Mei had had the pleasure of working with.

 **_What is their goal?_ ** She dried her face off with a towel, recalling the way Junkrat had glared at her, skin dripping with moisture from a fresh bathing, how he-- Mei went pink, remembering their first encounter how Junkrat was not entirely clothed. She ran back to the sink to splash her face with cold water this time, shoving the thought from her head with a vigorous towel rubbing that left her face red.

As she sat on the edge of her bed, tugging on the thick blue material of her leggings, she mulled over each time Roadhog would stare at her. It wasn’t until he had caught her eyes on the skin of his face that he became angry. Had she done something to offend him? Was her mouth agape?

Mei touched her lips, trying desperately to remember. But the thought was muggy and she was still tired. She buried her hands into the voluminous fur that hemmed her boots and stepped into one. **_Why was he so angry anyway?_ ** She assumed that everyone would stare if he pulled the mask aside, he had made it so taboo to see his face now she was curious to see the rest. What did he look like?

She stepped into the other boot, giggling softly at the thought of Roadhog with a pig nose. She stood, tugged her coat from a nearby hanger and wrapped it around her waist. The tank top she slept in was still fairly clean, only soiled by the sultriness of sleep, so she decided to wear it out.

She tapped on Snowball’s top as she passed them and they gave a sleepy beep. “Okay, lazy. Stay here and out of trouble.” A soft giggle lingered behind even after she had closed the door firmly behind her.


	4. A Lapse of Breath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this came a bit late, guys! I kept rewriting it and I'm still not 100% sure it's all there but it's a long one so.....
> 
> Translation of the tiny bit of rusty Spanish in this chapter: "What are you doing with that?" -- "You're not going to do anything with something so small" 
> 
> "Do you understand?"

The debriefing was early, perhaps a bit too early for the tastes of most in the base. When Mei skipped in, she was met with reddened eyes, faces sagging into cups of piping hot coffee as they sat around the crescent curve of the meeting table. The only two that looked alert and ready for the meeting was Winston and Mercy. Both were seated at the center, holographic screens flashing the faces of multiple people Mei didn’t recognize had been pulled up in the middle. Winston made a quick gesture, flicking them above everyone’s heads and spreading them out.

Mei took a seat beside Tracer who was half slumped on the table, eyes closed, drooling a small puddle on her arm and her grip loosened on her coffee cup. Her chestpiece glowed a dull blue, washing her features in a cool light.

Winston cleared his throat and Mei nudged her elbow into Tracer’s side who awoke with a slurred “whozzat,” before resting weary eyes on Winston. She tucked a lazy hand under her chin and watched him with drooping eyes.

“I know it’s early for some of you,” he began, peering over the top of his glasses to the noticeable smattering of empty seats. **_No Junkrat or Roadhog_ ** , Mei mused. They didn’t seem the type to wake up early. “I appreciate that the bulk of you who have taken this mission seriously have arrived,” his mouth twitched and the glance to the door gave away his annoyance that the two Junkers indeed had not shown up.

“As you’re aware, Overwatch is….” He twisted his mouth, moving to shove his glasses up on his snout, “Well, we’re in the works. Point and case being that we’ve located contacts: the brightest minds the world has to offer--” He flicked through a few pages of faces, tiny clumps of words glued to the side of each one. They were too blurry to read. “--however the rate of acceptance to our invitations of a reinstatement within Overwatch ranks has been met with much…. Hesitance.”

Winston cleared his throat, clearly nervous under the attention of others and Mei made a point to look down at Tracer’s coffee. She reached for it and tapped her companion’s arm who looked at her sleepily. A point to the cup and Tracer nodded, dropping her head back on her hand and staring in Winston’s general direction with unfocused eyes. Mei took a sip of the brew, wrinkling her nose at the bitterness.

Winston droned on for a few more minutes, his words buzzing in Mei’s ears, swimming lazily around her head as she took sip after sip of the coffee. She was barely aware that he dismissed them and shuffled towards the kitchen to fill her stolen cup back up, dumping several heaping spoonfuls of sugar in and stirring slowly.

The information she had barely seemed to soak in was swimming lazily in her head. She was to lead a 3-Person cell with Tracer and Genji, a small strike team whose goal was merely to make sure the area was clear so that Mercy & Winston could plan a safe passage of a potential recruit. There wasn’t much else that Mei had understood in her fatigued state. He had handed out folders with more information and she thanked him internally for that, knowing that she would not have been able to remember half the things he spoke about.

Mei trudged back to her room, folder tucked under her arm, fingers clasped firmly around the warm mug, lost in thought.

It wasn’t until she heard the telltale bark of laughter, a manic sort of sound, that told her Junkrat was nearby. She nearly dove into a nearby alcove in panic but steadied her nerves and took to sidestepping neatly into an unoccupied hallway instead. Her ears pricked up, skin tingling as she strained to hear what he was saying.

He was talking to someone, his voice a little more gravelly than usual. Perhaps a leftover symptom of sleep. “...we’re not exactly th’kind of people that your blokes really like to mingle with. Doesn’t do anyone much good if you force us on them.”

“While I understand that, Mr. Fawkes, it is partial to the distribution of information--” Winston’s voice rang out above the other’s, a twinge of exasperation hollowing his words.

“Don’t gotta get fancy with me.”

A pause, Mei could almost see Winston’s mouth curling, his jaw clenching as he fought the urge to bare his teeth.“It’s important that you hear what we all have to say about your future missions.”

“Just point and shoot, right? We’re as capable as anyone you have on your team, don’t need any _special_ treatment.” Junkrat practically spat out the last two words and Mei wondered why.

It went quiet for  a moment and Mei took a step towards freedom but froze when she heard Junkrat pipe up again.

“Whassat girl you got?”

Winston gave a short grunt, clearly displeased at the thought of Junkrat calling any of his coworkers ‘that girl’. “We have a team of extremely--”

“Yeah, yeah. I get it. Don’t care about them, mate. There’s only one I’m askin’ about.”

“Who?”  
“Short. Real short. S’all soft but she’s got mischief eyes. Easy to look at. Deals with the cold but she’s real warm.”

Winston took a moment to mull over Junkrat’s odd description before answering, “Mei?”

She supposed Junkrat had shrugged because Winston gave a general description of her.

“Yeah, yeah! That’s her. Just wanted t’know, thanks, mate.”

There was an awkward pause before Junkrat excused himself with a ‘ _ta_ ’ and Mei could hear the uneven gait and clack of his prosthetic fading into the distance. She flattened herself against the wall as best she could as she recognized the lumbering shuffle of Winston passing her. He looked irritated and Mei didn’t blame him.

\-- -- --

The teams had been grouped and boarded onto a mid size carrier. Mei never did like flying and felt her pulse skyrocket as she strapped herself into the seat. The taught material of the belt scraped her neck, adding to her distaste. She shifted, leaning towards Tracer in the seat next to  her. She tried to avoid the gaze of Junkrat who sat directly across from her, grinning at the air while his eyes locked on Mei. He looked… hungry. Mei nudged Tracer with her elbow, her mouth dry.

“How long until we land?”

“Shouldn’t be long, love. Got a fear of flying, do we?”

Mei gave a small smile and nodded weakly. That was no longer at the forefront of her mind.

“Ah, don’t worry bout it. It’ll be a smooth ride, I did a thorough diagnostics check of every part of this aircraft. Should be right as rain till we land!”

Mei nodded, her gaze flicking towards the Junkers. Junkrat was still staring at her, that grin that stretched the corners of his lips too far for her liking was plastered on his face.

When they landed, Mei breathed a sigh that made her lungs ache. She fumbled with her seatbelt, desperate to feel solid earth under her feet again and lurched forward, out of her seat. She stumbled towards the door, making a point not to look towards the Junkers whose gazes she could feel burning the hairs on the back of her neck.

Each team had their orders, Winston gave them only a brief pause to connect their personal earpieces to each other before the hiss of the hydraulics gave way to a darkened sky, they zipped out, joining with each other seamlessly. Mei trotted alongside Genji who had slowed his pace significantly for her. Tracer zipped ahead, the glow of her chronal accelerator leaving eerie ghosts in the thick air.

 _Scour the perimeter, wait for Talon to arrive and disengage any enemies that might appear_. That was the official order for their team. Mei craned her neck to the ship before disappearing around the corner and caught a glimpse of Junkrat and Roadhog, bouncing at an uneven gait along the dark skyline. Before she could stop herself, she found herself hoping they would be safe.

Dorado was truly a beautiful place. Mei had never set foot here before and she slowed her pace if only to glance at the colorful walls that ran up and down the streets, washed with strokes of a warm yellow from the streetlights. Her thoughts ran lost in admiration as they rounded a corner. The group was met with the town’s square, illuminated by strings of lights that draped from the center fountain.

“Something does not feel right,” the metallic vibrato of Genji’s voice at her side made her jump a bit. He had crept up beside the two, silent despite the metal that encased him. They had been nonverbal most of the night and the sudden sound was a bit off putting.

“Maybe--” Tracer’s reply was cut off nearly immediately. The wall to their right had been blown open, bits of painted adobe showered them and Mei was thrown off balance by the shockwave. Her finger locked on the trigger of her gun, showering thick volleys of snow into the air as she fell. Genji had jumped back, landing like a cat on all fours before pushing off the ground to hop to the rooftop and he was gone. Tracer slammed the pulsing button on her chest and rewound, popping back into reality to a few feet away, eyes wide. Mei coughed, rolling over to push herself to her feet. A fierce ringing in her left ear told her that her earpiece was ruined and she ripped it out, tossing it to the ground.

Luckily they hadn’t been close enough to feel the full force and as Tracer and Mei scrambled to safety behind the edge of the wall, the men that poured out of the ruined mouth did not notice them. They marched into the square, guns held firmly at their hips. The sound of the rattling explosion had brought panicked faces to nearby windows and Mei steadied herself against the cool adobe, sucking in breaths of painful air to steady her racing heart.

“ _What was that? Tracer is your team alright? I’m reading elevated levels of stress and minor damages to your health._ ” Mercy’s voice buzzed, tinny and small, from Tracer’s earpiece.

“We’ve got company,” Tracer hissed, “Gonna need backup for this one, loves. Doesn’t look like they’re here to play.”

Mei dipped her head around the corner, watching intently and carefully. The men dragged something--someone?--out of the splintered wall and threw them roughly to the ground. From the distance Mei couldn’t make out what they were saying but a vicious kick to the side of the victim didn’t bode well for anyone. She passed a wide eyed glance at Tracer who took a deep breath.

“We have to do something,” she mouthed, voice teetering barely above a whisper, “they have someone.”

Tracer grimaced. “Count of three, Mei. You boost me above them with your wall and I’ll go in guns blazin’, alright?” She lifted her pistols skyward, elbows tucked at her sides.

Mei swallowed but nodded slowly, clicking a chamber out of her gun. She padded silently to the side, praying that the men didn’t see her break from cover. Tracer followed, readying herself.

“Now!” Mei shot the wall up and Tracer zipped forward with a flourish, sneaker boosting off the top of the wall. Her body twisted in the air, a quick zip of her guns emptied themselves into the two nearest guards and she was gone in a flash of blue. But it had happened so fast that Mei had not thought to hide. The wall began to crumble under the rapid staccato of gunfire, leaving her open. She steadied her gun, waiting till the break in the wall was large enough and--

Her gun kicked viciously and the icicle it had fired buried itself in the man’s chest. Mei’s brow knitted as she fired off another one, fighting the rising feeling of dread running through her veins, threatening to freeze her to the spot. Her legs ushered forth, plunging out of the way of another volley of fire. Snowball gave a soft beep from her pack, signaling the wall was ready once more and Mei took a dive and a roll, leveling her gun with both hands and jutting another wall of ice between her and her attackers.

She could hear the rapid purr of Tracer’s guns being emptied again and again beyond her defense. Mei ran to the side alley, ducking behind the archway and following the curve of the path as it lead her to an exit off the side. Tracer’s chronal accelerator blipped and she was gone once more, appearing a short ways off and diving behind a few of the permanent newspaper stands for cover. Mei knew what that meant: the core to her accelerator had overheated and was in cooldown. The men seemed to understand something was wrong and converged on her.

In a panic, Mei dashed forward, launching a flurry of thick liquid onto the nearest man. He screamed when it touched him, encasing his legs in ice. A thick spear came next, burying itself in his side and he went down with a gurgle. The remainder of the men turned, guns raised but a bark from one of them stopped the rest. In the ghostly glow of the ruined lights, the leader stepped forward and Mei felt herself go cold. His face had been tattooed (or painted?) with the likeness of a skull, the substance used lit his face with a sort of eerie luminescence. He stormed to her, cloak billowing, eyes burning and Mei stumbled back from such an intensity, gun raised with shaking hands.

“ _Que haces con eso_ ?” He growled, giving a curt nod to her weapon, “ _No vas hacer nada con algo tan peqeuño_.”

Mei found herself rooted to the spot, eyes bulging in fear as the remainder of the gang advanced on her. The few that didn’t had dragged Tracer from her cover, guns pointed at her chest and she was staring at them, lip pouted. The leader advanced on her, his eyes never leaving her gun.

“ _Entiendes_?” A question, perhaps? She swallowed and remained silent. His mouth twisted, teeth baring. “Let’s try this again.” This time Mei understood and he seemed to know he had hit something familiar.

“Who are you?” He growled, “what are you doing here?”

Mei opened her mouth, feeling the words she had shakily prepared drown in a wave of fear. She prayed the backup would get here soon. Where had Genji gone?

“I won’t ask you again,” the accented english was coarse with rage, “ **who are you**?”

Mei gaped her mouth again. Before she could respond, a shrill scream ripped from the throat of one of her attackers. A massive hook had encircled his leg and she watched in horror as he was dragged from view. A bang. Silence.

There was a pause where the leader looked at another man, almost comedic if Mei hadn’t been ready to faint from fear, before panic ensued. The leader hopped backwards, rifle unholstered from the sling across his back and pointed in the direction his man had disappeared. He fired blindly, screaming strings of commands in spanish.

Amongst the cacophony Mei heard the distinctive sound of an engine growling and with a red glow, the source of it ripped through the bullets. A tire. It swerved around Mei who took a leap towards the nearest stand as the bullets followed it, bouncing and skidding along the walls before burying itself in the thickest part of the throng and exploding. Mei screamed then, her hands clapping over her ears, bits of the stand itself collapsing around her. Bodies were thrown every which direction, her ears rang. Her glasses clattered from her face as she rocked back and forth, sucking in gulps of air, whimpers bubbling from her throat.

And suddenly hands were pulling her from her hiding place and she fought, shrieking and kicking. They were going to kill her, they were going to murder her. They pressed her into the ground and she gasped for air, suddenly feeling as though the mere gravity of the world was crushing her into the cobblestone. She felt her body jerk and suddenly-- air.

She guzzled down thirsty breaths, feeling her chest rise and fall. The hands were at her coat, tearing it from her. She realized how gentle they were.

The buzz of the explosion died down in her ears, panicked shouts sliced past the fog of confusion and she blinked. Blurry faces, vaguely familiar, hovered over her. 

“I found her glasses, here--”

The world came into focus as the lenses were awkwardly slid on her face and she recollected her surroundings. Tracer, Mercy and Pharah crowded her vision. Their faces contorted in worry. She took a few moments, letting her breathing regulate before pushing herself up on her elbows.

“Are you alright?” A soft voice questioned, full of concern that it made her heart ache with the thought that she was the reason it was there.

“She is not injured,” Mercy’s eyes were scouring every part of Mei, her caduceus staff emitting a soft golden glow. “Not physically.”

“What happened?” Her own voice was hoarse with emotion, it felt as though her throat was coated in soot.

“Surrounded, mate.” Junkrat came into view. Mei noted how ragged he looked. Although the smile was still plastered upon his face she saw the layer of grime and grease cover his fingers, the dull way his eyes shone with an emotion she couldn’t quite put her finger on. “Had yourself quite a situation. Me n’ Hog remedied that though.” A puff of his chest and he cast a glance back at the larger man who shuffled forward, mask trained on Mei.

And suddenly it came crashing to her. The fight, the man who glowed, the--

Mei scrambled to her feet, eyes wide. She shoved past Mercy and Tracer, stumbling across the the ruined square to a figure that was still curled up in the midst of the carnage. Her jacket, which had been partially wrenched open, came off along with the pack that her gun was connected to and her gloves. She fluffed it out, spreading it over the figure before skimming her fingers along… metal? Her confusion scrunched her face and she moved in the dark light, tapping Snowball to coax them to life. Snowball whirred to her hand. “Light, please.” A low glow washed over the figure and Mei was met with the keen shine of metal. An omnic. Lights dotted their forehead, a flickering a dull orange. They had taken quite a beating, parts of their chest dented, wires exposed. Mei paused, unsure what to do next.

Tracer was the first one at her side, muttering a soft ‘oh no’ before calling to Mercy. Mercy took the cue to glide over, the glow of her wings casting a contrasting ambience to the wreckage around them.

Mercy’s staff bathed the omnic in a golden brilliance. Her lips were drawn into a thin line as she surveyed the damage to the bot. “Get them up, this requires more attention than I am free to give.”

Mei hooked a hand under the thick joint of their shoulder, hefting them up slowly. Tracer ducked her head under the other arm, catching Mei’s jacket as it slid away. The two pulled the omnic into a sitting position and then worked their way to their feet. Pharah stepped in there, her armored grip sliding under the bot’s mangled legs. She lifted them with ease, letting their head rest gently in the nook between her chestpiece and the bulky shoulder casings.

Junkrat loped forward, teeth bared, eyes alight in anger. “What do y’think you’re doing, mate?” He snarled.

Pharah regarded him coldly, Mei saw her grip tighten. “When we’ve found an injured party. We do what we must to make sure that they are delivered safely from danger.” It sounded more like she was reciting something than answering his question.

“Injured party usually means blood and guts. This _thing_ has none of those.” Junkrat’s eyes bore holes in Pharah’s helm. He came close, perhaps too close because Pharah widened her stance, her gaze glaring out from beneath the beak of her helmet.

Junkrat heeded the warning and sidestepped, “we didn’t sign up to protect bots. Pieces of _junk_.” He spat the last word, a low growl rumbling from his chest.

Mei bubbled with anger. She shot to him, jabbing a finger into his chest. “We are here to protect those in need. No matter what it is or what you _think_ it is!” Junkrat stumbled back, clearly confused. “I am sure there are some of the team that would say the same thing about you!”

  
Junkrat took a step back, his head inclined towards the fiery woman now scolding him at chest height. His brow furrowed, mouth opening and closing. He gaped at her for a moment before giving a sharp grunt and turning on his heel to hobble back to Roadhog.

Mei breathed out a steady breath in triumph, turning her attention back to the omnic in question. Pharah pressed forward with the rest in tow.

 


	5. Bully!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's a bit shorter, sorry folks! I'm writing a longer chapter after this one, I promise!!!

It had been a few days since the rescue of the unnamed omnic and with each day that passed, Junkrat and Roadhog spackled on a hefty layer of unease to the already tension thick atmosphere. It became apparent just how bad the situation was getting when he made a move to attack a fellow teammate.  

He loped through the med bay doorway, foot stomping down with a barely contained rage as he made his way to the area the omnic was resting. Genji and Mercy were the first to block his path, sensing the looming disorder. “There ain’t no sense to it, mate!” He growled, coming to a halt in front of Mercy. His wild gaze snapped to Genji and he regarded him coldly, eyes narrowing. “No one told us we was going to be working with _them,”_ he spat at Genji who neatly sidestepped the obscene gesture.

Mei stirred from her spot in the armchair next to the omnic, blinking weariness from her eyes. Junkrat’s sharp voice pierced her fog and she craned her neck to see him. Roadhog was lumbering in after him, Genji had stepped forward, shoulders taught, the roping of his faux muscles strained as his legs parted into a wider stance. His hand hovered over the slight dagger at his side. This was bad. Mei scrambled to her feet, nearly falling flat on her face when she almost tripped over her own boots. She had taken them off before dozing and now hurried over to the group, barefoot and in her tanktop and leggings. Her coat and tank were forgotten, draped over the back of the armchair.

Mercy had been trying to calm Junkrat but when his hulking companion entered she raised her hands in an attempt to look pacifying. Roadhog took his place behind Junkrat, shoulders sloped slightly forward, towering over him. Mei’s skin prickled at the sight of him and when she dashed between the four, she realized just how small she really was in comparison to the rest. Junkrat had straightened up partially and the true realization of his height hit her when he looked down to meet her gaze. His eyes were fiery. Anger coiled in his posture, like a rabid animal tensed to pounce. She felt a similar sensation behind her in the form of Genji, poised to strike.

“Please!” She begged, her eyes wide behind her glasses, “Please, don’t do this. We are supposed to be a team!”

“A team?” Junkrat hissed, “Last we looked our team didn’t consist of _junk._ ”

Mercy’s hand shot out, fingers spread wide across Genji’s chest. He had tried to lunge, Mei realized and the only thing stopping him was the coldness in Mercy’s eyes.

“Get out,” she breathed, her voice barely above a whisper. Mei had never seen her like this. “This is a place of healing, one where my patients come to recover and you are intruding with a rudeness I have not seen the likeness of.”  

Junkrat dragged his gaze from Mei and met Mercy’s. She was seething anger, a composed fury. Her back was level with the wall, shoulders drawn backwards, standing taller than Mei had ever seen her. The dark turtleneck of armor that cupped her jaw gave her angular features a menacing look, Mei thought. They stood like that for a few minutes, she felt Junkrat weighing the situation and he seemed to decide against pushing it further because his prosthetic leg fell back a step with a soft _clack._

Roadhog twisted his body, waiting till Junkrat had swiveled around to walk out before following. His mask lingered on Mei for a moment. She had been standing with her feet planted firmly, both arms outstretched to either party. He grunted softly and followed Junkrat out.  

Mei breathed a sigh of relief, relaxing when the duo disappeared into the fading light of the hallway and Mercy seemed to recollect herself, shrinking in appearance as her face softened. Genji’s shoulders decompressed, cylinders sliding outward with a hiss of steam. The atmosphere melted and the three of them wordlessly stared back at the omnic nestled within a bed of wires and machines. The dread in Mei’s chest knotted uncomfortably close to her heart.

 

\-- -- --

 

The mission they had been sent on had not been a success. The damages done by the gang that Mei had learned to be Los Muertos had sent a shock through the city. They had been known for smuggling, the occasional riff raff that you avoided on your way through the streets, perhaps. But this was different. A hostage situation called for delicate political matters that Winston was sure this would further undermine the reputation of Overwatch. The fight, the deaths that had wracked up a body count Mei had only seen the likeness of when-- She shuddered, pushing the thought down. Now was not the time to dwell on her past.

The contact that they had been searching for had left the city, leaving a trail in his wake that Winston had been meticulously tracking for the past week. The matters of Dorado hung over their progress like a stormcloud but Mercy had suggested pushing the mission, if only to distract Winston of the fresh chip in Overwatch’s credibility.

The mission up for debate was being debriefed to a smaller group than what Mei had first seen at ungodly hours in the morning. Tracer, Genji, Zenyatta, Junkrat and Roadhog along with herself sat in the conference room. The two Junkers had taken seats far from the rest, still within earshot of Winston but within glaring distance of Genji and Zenyatta. Junkrat was still nursing his pride, she supposed. He was draped over a chair, his leg thrown over the arm, one arm dangling at the opposite edge of the back. His peg leg was planted firmly against the floor, tipping the chair backwards on two legs. Mei eyed him nervously hoping he wouldn’t crash to the ground.

Roadhog sat silently in the sofa next to him, mask an unending slate of blank emotion. His snout was pointed towards Winston but Mei could swear his gaze was locked on her. Her neck prickled.

Mei turned her focus back to Winston, trying as desperately as she could to focus on what he was saying but it slipped through her head loosely. She was painfully aware of the feeling of being watched and whether it was her own paranoia (which was something she tried to convince herself it was,) or Roadhog was actually staring at her, it distracted her from anything else in the room. She found herself picking at her leggings, teeth grinding as it became nearly unbearable to focus. Finally, Winston dismissed them.

Mei shot up, gathering the sheets of paper they had been reviewing into her folder and turning to hurry out of the room. She slipped out the door before anyone else and hurried down the hallways, her own blood rushing in her ears. Lost in thought, trying to shake the feeling of dread from the pit of her stomach she turned a tight corner and ran smack dab into Junkrat.

She bounced backwards, feet steadying on the ground. God, no. Her eyes flicked up to Junkrat’s face, he was staring intently at her and she noticed his entire body was facing her. As if he had planted himself in the middle of the hallway. Had he been waiting for her? She gave a quick glance behind him, expecting the towering figure of Roadhog but he was nowhere to be found. **_A small mercy,_ ** she thought.

“What’s your game?”

Mei blinked. Her fingers curled nervously around the folders, bending them in her hands. “I-I don’t know what you mean?”

“Make a habit of collecting bits of metal.” Junkrat’s brow crawled together as if he was trying to read something particularly difficult. “Not in the good way, either. It’s not a game, y’know. Could get yourself hurt bloody fast trusting them.”

Mei grit her teeth, fighting the urge to snap back at him. But he continued, not seeming to notice how badly he was irking her. “Liars, the lot of ‘em. Try and make nice with ya but how can they? They’re not real--”

“That’s _enough._ ”

Junkrat blinked, suddenly focusing on her. Mei was pouting with anger and he made note of the way her lip stuck out ever so slightly, the crease between her eyebrows and how she nudged her glasses up with a scrunch of her nose. He swallowed. Was she angry? Had he upset her?

“You’re nothing but a _bully,”_ she had let go of one side of her folder and now prodded him squarely in the chest, her finger forcing him back a step. “You don’t know everyone’s story, how can you be so quick to judge? How do you look at yourself in the mirror?”

Junkrat retracted from her, his mouth twisting. “That’s cold,” he murmured.

Mei felt a pang of regret. Had she been too mean? She shoved the thought aside, instead deciding to focus on keeping the scowl of disapproval on her face. At least, she hoped it was a scowl. It seemed to work, however, because Junkrat sniffed and turned to face slightly away from her.

“No need to get hostile, mate. I understand.” He walked past her, giving her a wide berth. Mei stood still, dropping her gaze to the floor, cheeks warming up. Her finger that had accused his chest burned and she stared at it, regret washing warmly over her for a brief second.

She supposed she had meant to hurt his feelings. That was the intention, wasn’t it? But she wasn’t prepared for the hurt that seemed to wash over his features at her words. Why had he been there anyway? Waiting for her? She shook herself of each thought and glanced up only then realizing just how close she had been to her quarters.

She was going to stay away from the two of them, she decided finally.


	6. Curiouser and Curiouser

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready, here comes a lot of feeling confusion hehehe

The ride in the aircraft had left Mei wound tight again, nerves jingling with fear and anxiety. She felt her hands shaking as she undid her the safety harness and squirmed to the floor. She had never liked flying, not since she was little. She removed her glasses to breathe on the lenses and rub them against the soft fur of her collar. Her teammates crowded the door to the aircraft and Tracer had taken place as an interim leader, making sure each person was connected through their earpieces before repeating their orders: break apart, locate and regroup.

Mei had wondered just why Junkrat and Roadhog had been picked for such a mission. Their motives usually ended up with destruction, chaos. Something that Winston had been particularly trying to avoid. But she supposed that they did not become as notorious as they are by simply chucking themselves through securities and winging it. But… perhaps they had. Mei trusted the judgement that allowed them a spot in the mission but gave a silent prayer that it was not wrong.

When the doors opened, Mei was surprised to see the low light of sunset. Usually missions had started in the dark, the moon snug in the sky; but this time it was early. She followed her teammates, turning briefly to throw a glance to the orange sky. She silently wished she had time to stop and watch the sunset.

They were quiet as they pushed forward. The towering buildings of Rio de Janeiro gave the appearance of night as they stalked the streets, weaving in and out of alleyways to avoid the general populace. Just how they were going to find one person amongst the plethora of people was a marvel to Mei.

The city was busy on the main streets, perhaps a festival? She wasn’t sure. Bright vendors jabbered away in languages she did not understand but she caught lines of english here and there. The city was a mesh of cultures, color and volume deciding to blend together in the most fantastic of ways. She slowed briefly, mouth parted as she caught a glimpse of brightly colored costumes entertaining a group of children who giggled and cackled in a sound that warmed Mei’s heart. She had missed this, the socialization. She drank it in hungrily, watching the event and had not noticed that she had stopped completely until a crackle interrupted her hypnotized state.

“ _Mei? Mei we’ve lost you, where are you?_ ” Tracer’s voice crackled in her ear.

Shoot. Mei flushed a bright pink and looked in the direction they had been heading. Her teammates were nowhere to be found. She had no desire to admit her distraction was a show meant for children.

“Sorry! My cryochamber was leaking, I had to stop to see it fixed.” Snowball beeped at her from her pack and she threw them a warning glare.

“ _Oh. All fixed then?”_

“Ah, yes.”

“ _Good t’ hear, love. Alright, well good news is we did have to split up. But the bad news is you’ve done it far before the mark. I can send you some information on your pad, make sure to account for the time and watch for the rest of us! Keep us updated.”_

“Right. Sorry.”

“ _No worries, Mei! Just a bit of a hiccup. But do watch your surroundings, we can’t be too careful that Talon hasn’t caught on like we have. Radio silence for the time being, the lines are open only for emergencies til we converge on the target.”_

A click. Mei pulled a thin pencil like object from her jacket pocket and clicked the button at the end. A holographic screen flickered to view. Criss crosses of the local streets shone brightly on the map, light blue chevrons marking her companion’s whereabouts. Zenyatta and Genji flanked the group, breaking off to focalize the areas around the point. Tracer blinked from existence on the map, zipping closer to the goal than anyone else. Junkrat and Roadhog were stopped amongst a street that throbbed with a dull green indicating it was a point of high population activity. Mei’s brow furrowed. What were they doing?

She shrugged it off and instead focused on mapping her route to the target. She familiarized herself with the surrounding streets, turning in each direction to make out a landmark, something that proved much more difficult to her with the constant stretch of concrete in all directions. She settled on a few points and pressed forward, clicking the screen away and tucking the pen into her jacket once more.

\--

Junkrat sunk his teeth into a hefty piece of fruit and chewed thoughtfully, taking care to spit the large black seeds out on the ground. He lumbered alongside Roadhog, chest puffed out as the crowd parted, staring at him and his bodyguard. The celebrations were boisterous, the raucous cheering and continuous peals of laughter amongst the heavy thrum of music from each merchant stand that lined the street gave a sense of balanced chaos that Junkrat didn’t mind. Roadhog was a different story, however.

The girth of his entire being was not something that was often seen amongst… anyone really. He drew stares and stares were not necessarily something he enjoyed. He reached a massive hand to his companion, tugging carefully on the tire that was strapped to Junkrat’s back.

“Yeh?”

Roadhog jerked his head towards the buildings, signalling for the two to disappear behind them, retake their position towards their goal. Junkrat’s face screwed up as he took another bite of the cream colored insides of the fruit. “Do we gotta, mate? Too quiet. Makes me jittery.”

Roadhog gripped the tire harder and Junkrat took the hint. “Alright, alright, fine. Only doin’ this for you.” Junkrat tossed the ruined skin of the chirimoya fruit down, taking a turn through the crowd to make their way to silent streets.

The difference was incredible. As soon as they rounded the street corner the noise seemed to fade out entirely. Perhaps due to the architecture that had been put in place? Whatever it was, Roadhog seemed happier to be amongst the dark and silent. Junkrat grumbled, the silence was deafening in his ears. He itched for the cacophony of voices. His fingers stuffed themselves into his pant pocket, pulling out tiny poppers that he squeezed between his fingertips to break the silence. The pleasant burst of sound soothed him and Roadhog didn’t seem to mind so he continued, fishing more out.

They progressed, no verbal communication until Junkrat fidgeted with his thoughts and turned slightly to eye his companion.

“Roadie, what d’you think about her?”

“Who.”

“Who d’you think, mate? The Queen of England!” A shrill giggle was met with a low growl. “Takin’ the piss, Hog. You know who I’m talking about.”

“Why.”

“I dunno. She just… I just can’t figure it out. One moment she’s all friendly and the next she’s scolding me like I’m some sort of whelp-- mate, who does she think she is?”

Roadhog remained silent as Junkrat fumed. “Just thought she was gonna be nice to us, ya know?”

\--

Mei stopped in her tracks, brow creasing in frustration. She could have sworn she had gone down this street just a few minutes before. A right, a left-- no, another right? Mei sighed in frustration, flicking the map up for the fifth time in the last ten minutes and tried to pinpoint her location. To her surprise she found two blue arrows not a few blocks from her.

Mei sighed a breath of relief and jogged forward, her eyes locked on her navigation. Unfortunately for each of them, the map was only a crude diagram of whereabouts and really wasn’t supposed to be used for determining team location so just knowing which teammates she was running to was a gamble. She prayed it was Genji and Zenyatta.

She knew at a block away she would get no such luck. Junkrat’s giggle bounced from the walls and surrounded her. She groaned internally, giving the thought to duck and avoid them altogether a pleasant tease but knew it was in the best interest of the team to group up especially if she had no clue where she was going.

She padded forward, catching a low growl from Roadhog that made her legs stumble and the thought to leave edged into her mind once again. She caught a small tidbit of what Junkrat was saying and tilted her head to listen better. Were they… talking about her?

“They asked us to come. Not like we’d have joined up on our own, I guess.” It was Junkrat talking, Roadhog’s heavy breathing purred from under his mask and Mei was close enough to make out their silhouettes in the quickly fading light.

“I mean, no one likes us, Roadie. Which isn’t a big deal, mind you. Just-- I thought she was different, yeah? Not a bot kisser or nothin’.”

Bot kisser? Mei scrunched her face up. In her momentary distraction her shoe scuffed the ground. Roadhog whirled around, gun raised and Junkrat gave a low snarl, ripping a grenade from his harness and holding it aloft. He would have thrown it too, if Roadhog hadn’t shot a hand out to grab his wrist.

“It’s her.” 

Mei stood frozen, eyes wide. Her hands were shaking, brought up to her mouth. The reaction from her teammates had been so _feral,_ she had been half sure that they were going to pounce without thought.

Junkrat’s eyes hardened and he shook his hand out of Roadhog’s grip, shoving the canister back onto his chest. “What’re you doing? How long have y’been following us?”

Mei lowered her hands, curling them into fists to stop their quivering. She felt like a frightened rabbit. “Not long,” she assured in a voice that came out steadier than she had anticipated. “I’m lost.” Roadhog gave a wheezing laugh, the metallic tang of his mask seeming to mock her and she pouted angrily.

“Lost,” Roadhog repeated, giving a low rumble. “Always lost.”

“Yeah, yeah. Curiouser and curiouser, mate.” Junkrat giggled. Mei’s brow furrowed with the familiarity of the line. “Well come on, we’re the last bits of this puzzle. You’re supposed to be in front, meet up with the rest before us.”

Junkrat turned and began to walk forward again. Roadhog waited, his mask locking a cool stare at Mei’s face. She stepped forward shakily, willing herself to walk quickly towards the thinner man. The black leather of the mask shone dully under the artificial lights of the streets. Mei dipped past him but he followed her with it, clearly intent on not breaking eye contact with her back. She felt as though his gaze could swallow her.

They walked along in a newfound silence, the air uncomfortable and tight. Mei found it difficult to breathe normally and took to picking at the hem of her jacket with heavily gloved fingers. It wasn’t until Roadhog suddenly stopped, his mask raised, shoulders straightening that Mei felt something wrong.

A crack thundered to her right, a stream of wind whistled past her ear and the asphalt chipped behind her. “SNIPER,” Roadhog roared and made a lunge, grabbing Junkrat directly from his left and hauling him to cover. Mei dove, hitting the ground. Another crack, just by her leg. She shrieked in fear. A hand grabbed the back of her tank and yanked her into the shadows. Her clunky materials came into contact with Roadhog’s belly, his right arm looped firmly around her waist. Junkrat was in a similar situation in his left. Mei felt her breathing hitch as her protector squeezed her middle. He was unwittingly tightening his grip. She wheezed a bit, staring out at the street.

The decision on what to do next was frozen in her mind as she stayed wrapped in Roadhog’s grip. How were they to out maneuver a sniper? There wasn’t a clear answer Mei could think of. They were separated from the others-- Mei’s gasped, hands flying to her earpiece. **_The others_ **. She had to warn them. She clicked her mic on only to be met with a dull ring in her ear.

“Comms’re down,” Junkrat muttered from her side. “Talon, I reckon. Had this happen to us once when we interrupted a friendly outing a’theirs.”

“What will we do?”

Junkrat shrugged from his position. He was loosening the straps on his harness, clicking free a couple of grenades and flicking a few pockets open on his belt under Roadhog’s arm. “Find another way I s’pose. Not much else to do.” He patted Roadhog’s forearm and his companion let him down. Mei felt herself lowered as well.

“It’s gonna be chaos, mate.” Junkrat flashed Mei a grin, golden tooth glittering in the bleached light of streetlamps.

With a whoop, he tossed his mine out. Mei watched in horror as he pounced on it and detonated it in one movement. He went flying, a cackle following him as he soared through the air and landed neatly on top of a nearby building. Junkrat hopped from one foot to the other, turning to shout down to his companion.

“Bring her ‘round, Hog! Meet ya on the other side!”

A crack thrummed the air and Mei saw the telltale line of a bullet’s trail zoom past Junkrat. He chided the sniper with a shrill giggle, “lousy shot, mate!” Before loping off and out of sight.

Mei turned to Roadhog with round eyes, concern clear on her face. “Where is he going? He should be with us! Not--”

Roadhog turned away from her, shaking his head. He walked with a new speed Mei had not seen and she jogged to keep up. He was, after all, her teammate. She chewed in the inside of cheek as she followed him, heartbeat pounding in her ears. She was worried for their safety, for the safety of her teammates, but most of all… She disliked the lanky Junker but she didn’t want him _dead._

They moved hurriedly, ducking through the streets. She hadn’t pulled out her map once and instead put her trust in her greater companion who was weaving between alleyways. He stopped suddenly at the mouth of an archway and Mei stared up at him in confusion.

A sharp static buzzed in her ear and she jumped. “.... _Mei!”_ Tracer’s voice clipped in her ear, cutting in and out with the steady _kchhhh_ . “ _Talon found…. We’ve located the contact!... Careful… Retreat… Surrounded!”_

Mei pawed at her ear, desperately trying to hear the broken information. “Tracer, I-I cant--”

 _“Duck and cover!”_ A voice crackled in her comm, it wasn’t Tracer’s _._

Mei’s heart seemingly stopped in surprise. She glanced at Roadhog who had turned partway to look down at her. In the split second of mutual understanding, he threw himself toward her just as a deafening _krakoom_ shook the ground. His body surrounded her, hands lying flat on the nearest wall, pinning her to it. She gasped in surprise. He had shielded her. Her eyes locked on Roadhog’s mask, a delicate concern etching the edges of her round features. He was breathing raggedly from behind the cold leather. He seemed to understand her look of worry and nodded his head in a silent _I'_ _m okay._ Her fingers reached for the gun anchored at her hip.

Gunfire littered the scene behind him, Talon operatives pounced from the alleys at the sound of the thundering explosion and Mei could see a newly appeared Tracer, Genji and Zenyatta desperately trying to fight their way through the firefight that had erupted around them. The source of the blast came sailing forward, a manic scream of laughter rippling from his chest and bouncing off the walls.

Junkrat landed with a grunt a few feet away, tire gripped in his hands. “Watch me, Roadie!” Came the shout before he snagged a cord and ripped it backwards. His shoulders scrunched towards his ears, face pinched in a look of ecstasy as he _somehow_ maneuvered the tire forward. It disappeared from view in a roar, followed by another thunderous explosion and Junkrat relaxed, a lazy grin curling his mouth for a split second. “Music t’me ears.”

Mei steadied her gun as Roadhog’s form sidestepped from her, clearing her view. It was madness. Her teammates zipped around the battlefield, Tracer constantly blipping from view and reappearing only to bite into a Talon operative with the sting of her guns. Mei was sure she could hear her giggle.

Roadhog leveled his gun in one hand and his hook in the other before charging forward. Junkrat raised his grenade launcher skyward, popping a few bombs off into the sky and watching them arc towards the chaos in satisfaction.

Mei made a move to follow Roadhog, deciding it was now or never to group up with the team. She had only gotten a few steps in front of Junkrat when she spotted a couple men, swathed in black, make their way into an alley behind the main group. She curled her lips into a thin line and changed her direction, deciding that getting rid of stragglers one by one was perhaps the best option suited for her role in the fight. She gave a glance at Junkrat who was still focused on firing his weapon wildly, and dipped into the darkness of an alleyway, jogging with hurried breaths to make her way around the main throng of enemies. Her gun was steady in her grip but she felt her heart flutter in a sick sort of anticipation. She wasn’t sure what their outcome was going to be but she was sure she’d get her teammates back alive. With or without her. Everyone was counting on her. Thrums of her heartbeat echoed in her ears as she neared the area that the men had disappeared to. The thick muzzle of her gun unhinged slightly, a spear of ice forming slowly as she squeezed the trigger little by little.

“Flank them to the right, their defense is weakened there!”

Now.

Mei shot out from her hiding spot, squeezing the trigger of her gun and firing the icicle. It buried itself in one of the four men that she had taken by surprise. Four. Not one or two but a group.

She clicked snapped a button on the side of her gun, a flurry of liquid jetting out to the closest of them. He cried out when it touched bare skin, twisting away from the stream as his remaining two companions lunged forward, knocking Mei to the ground. She let out a scream, her head crashing to the hard cement. Her vision swam in front of her eyes, the world throbbing. She was barely aware of a heavy weight on her chest until it became difficult to breathe. Padded finger clawed weakly at her attackers, punches and kicks connecting only with air. She scrambled for her gun, fingers shaking in the confines of her gloves.

She closed them around something hard and swung up, connecting with the man on her chest with a sharp, sickening _crack._ He screamed in agony and she felt the weight lessen as he slumped to her side, whimpering.

“OI, _GERROFFA HER_.”

Junkrat’s form barreled into one of the men advancing on her, knocking him to the ground. A mechanical fist lashed out, orange metal connecting with flesh. Something crunched and the third man dropped like a stone.

The fourth scrabbled for his companion’s fallen weapon and raised it, muzzle nearly pressed against Junkrat’s chest. He only grinned wildly in response. If this man was threatening with fear, it was lost on him.

“Don’t bring a gun t’a bomb fight, mate.”

The muzzle drifted slowly from him and through the swimming haze, Mei found herself staring at cold metal. Junkrat’s face fell, panic creeping into his features.

“I’ll kill _her_ instead,” came the low growl.

“Like hell you will.” Junkrat sounded venomous. With a movement faster than Mei had ever seen, he tossed a grenade just in front of his prosthetic leg and kicked. **_Too close to him!_ ** Mei screamed in her head watching as it exploded between the two and both were thrown back. Mei slapped a hand to her gun, leveled it and jerked the trigger. The icicle found the man’s gut and he shrieked in agony just before hitting the wall. Then, silence.

Dizzy and bruised, Mei rolled over in an effort to search for Junkrat. He lay a few feet behind her, the prosthetic of his leg splintered and ruined. Burn marks scorched his pants, still smoking from the stunt he had pulled.

Mei raised herself to her knees, the dizziness of the world stilling as panic coursed through her like a fire. “Junkrat?” She whispered, her voice hoarse. She crawled closer to him, ripping her mitten off with her teeth and reaching to touch his skin. Fear rose like bile in her throat as her shaking fingers journeyed to him. **_He’s dead_** , she thought, **_he’s dead and it’s my fault. I didn’t warn him, didn’t tell him._**

He was still his same fiery temperature but he was so still. Mei dragged herself to his side, tucking her legs under her. She whisked quick hands over him, shaking his arm gently. Tears burned her eyes. Her fingers found his hand, warm and calloused against her soft ones.

“Junkrat, please. They’re gone. Are you okay? Answer me, Junkrat, please!”

A groan. She almost sobbed in relief but swallowed it down, sucking in a soft breath of air instead. His eyes opened slowly and he blinked, rolling his gaze to her. His eyes were unfocused and dull but he was awake, he was _alive._ He moved to prop himself up on his elbows, looking down at his leg. Another groan.

“Bloody hell. S’gonna take me weeks to repair that.”

Mei fought the urge to throw herself in relief across him, deciding that that action was best left undone for everyone’s sake. He winced, eyes dropping to her grip on his fingers. “Gonna need that back. S'my only good one.” Mei dropped his fingers with a start, not realizing she had been gripping onto him so tightly.

She felt the shock ebb from her veins as he flexed his mechanical arm, making sure everything was still working. Anger replaced her concern and she reached out to punch him square in the chest. Perhaps a little harder than she had anticipated because his eyes popped open and he let out a small ‘ _oouf’_ as her fist connected. 

“You _IDIOT_ ,” she yelled. She was done babying him. He was going to live and now she was angry. He stared at her incredulously, a mixture of confusion and wonder alight in his eyes. “Who told you it was okay to come charging in like that? You could have gotten yourself killed! Then where would we be?”

Junkrat gaped at her, his mouth opening and closing stupidly. All he could manage was a small, “ _me_?”

“You put yourself and this team in danger! You… you < _stupid man_ >!” The chinese had slipped through in a form of a hostility and she was fuming now, pounding on his chest with one gloved hand and accusing him with the other. Her face was done up in a scowl.

“I wasn’t the one running in all willy nilly tryna be the saviour!” He shot back, finally finding his voice. Mei huffed. “Reckon I had to keep an eye on you, you weren’t doing it yourself!”

“ _Oooh_!” Mei drew herself up, stamping her foot down and jutting up from the ground in an attempt to storm off. A bad idea. As soon as she had gotten halfway up she felt the world spin. Her head swam and she suddenly felt very sick. Her balance dropped and she heard a soft “whoa, whoa! Ey!” as Junkrat’s arms shot out to catch her. She rolled into his chest, breathing hard. “Took a right wallop on the skull, did ya forget?” He snickered, looking down at her.

Her face went pink. He was so _warm._ Radiating heat like no other person she had set hands on. Not that her hands were actually on him, they were tucked to her chest, eyes screwed shut to keep the world from spinning. She felt him shift, his body twisting and the ear that was pressed to his chest heard the low rumble of his voice.

“‘Bout time you found us, mate. She took a beating to the head, can’t stand. Where’s everyone?”

A low purr from Roadhog’s mask came as a response but Mei felt so tired, she couldn’t decipher his words. The heat from Junkrat was intoxicating, lulling her to sleep.

“Oi, hey. Whoa, no falling asleep.” Junkrat patted her cheek and she stirred against him, eyes struggling to open. “Roadie, I can’t move. She’s got me pinned here and me leg’s bad. Best go get the others.” Junkrat slid a hand under Mei’s tucked legs and moved her a bit, shaking her to make sure she stayed awake.

A soft groan was pulled from her parted lips and Junkrat swallowed, eyes locked on them. Her entire self was so… _soft._ He had been used to hard and sharp, the flats of Australia were unforgiving in his time as a Junker and there was nearly nothing soft to hold onto there. Even on the run when he fancied himself a break he had not often found a place to lay that was heavenly pleasant. Although, most places didn’t take stolen notes but that was a different story entirely. Here she was, though. Curled against his chest, the fur of her collar brushing her plump cheeks, her ungloved hand curled loosely into the pillowy bosom of her coat. He felt his fingers sink into the flesh of her calves and a warmth stirred in his face. Mei’s eyelashes were fluttering as she struggled to stay awake and Junkrat was frozen underneath her, mouth suddenly dry.

Tracer’s voice chirped through the alley and she was suddenly beside them, staring down at Mei. “What happened?” She questioned, eyes wide. Her body twisted, surveying the scene.

Junkrat shrugged passively, reaching to pat Mei’s cheek once more. Her eyes blinked open sluggishly. Roadhog plodded over, reaching down to scoop Mei from his arms and he breathed in as she was pulled from his lap. The sudden absence of her warmth leaving him cold and uncomfortable. “Keep her awake,” he nodded at Roadhog who returned the gesture curtly and made his way back through the alley.

Tracer squatted beside him now, brow furrowed as she let him throw an arm around her shoulders. Junkrat grunted, pushing himself off the ground and leaning heavily on her, testing his step on the splintered leg. It was significantly shorter than it had been but he could walk on it. Granted the gait was awkward and he heavily relied on Tracer for balance.

  
They shuffled back to the street which now a wreckage of bulletholes and a few unfortunate Talon operatives. Zenyatta and Genji stood to the side of a man Junkrat did not recognize. Not that it was really the top priority in his mind at the moment, he was staring after Roadhog at the soft boots that hung over his companion’s arm and how small they looked now.


	7. White Rabbit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little more Roadhog than the last chapters gave. He's kinda hard to write, ok!!!

The hustle to the med bay was a painstaking one for Junkrat and Tracer. As soon as they had touched down Roadhog had bounded off, Mei still wrapped in his arms. Junkrat was desperate to get after them but Tracer hissed at the taller man.

“There’s not very much I can do from here, Junkrat!” She snapped as he tried to stride forward, throwing them both off balance and almost leaving them in a piled heap. She was much smaller than he was and the awkward height difference left them taking deliberate steps. Junkrat could feel his entire body tense and his blood jitter as Roadhog got further away.

Finally they hobbled through the doorway and Junkrat’s eyes flicked to each of the beds that lay in the room. Empty. Empty. Omnic. Empty. Empty. Aha. Mercy was hovering over Mei, her thin frame draped in a fluffy robe as though she had just gotten out of bed to tend to her. Pale blonde hair hung in wisps around her angular face, she was bathed in the harsh white light that also fell on Mei’s still figure. Junkrat felt his heart race and barely registered Roadhog's presence when he lumbered over.

“You can take him now, right?” Tracer piped from his side, her nose was scrunched, the pointed tip somehow reaching higher. She was not enjoying having to be so close to Junkrat for so long. Roadhog nodded and she waited till his great hands took Junkrat’s mechanical arm, steadying him as she ducked out from under it and gave them a "Cheers!" as she zipped away to chat with Mercy. Junkrat’s hands grasped to Roadhog's forearm, his gaze still locked on Mei.

“She okay, mate?” He murmured and Roadhog glanced in her direction but said nothing.

“Sit down,” came the rumble from the mask.

Junkrat nodded and the two made their way to the nearest group of chairs. Junkrat plopped down and Roadhog squeezed onto the sofa next to him.

“Reckless,” he chewed over the word she had called him, his brow crinkling. “She called me reckless, Hog. _Me!_ ” A scoff from Junkrat and he shook his head, fingers nimbly unbuckling and unlatching the bindings of his ruined prosthetic leg.

Still, Roadhog was silent, his mask pointed at the floor and nestled into his chest, breathing soft and deep. Junkrat looked over at him, an eyebrow cocking. He was asleep. Junkrat didn’t blame him, the poor lug had had more than enough time tending to not only Junkrat but Mei too. But how was he to get anywhere with his crutch sound asleep? He grunted, finally pulling off the splintered wood and examining it closely. It could be replaced, sure, the bits of metal that held the actual thick bar of wood into place were only dented and scraped from bits of shrapnel. He brushed a few pieces free of soot and dirt, licking a blackened finger and rubbing furiously at flecks of blood.

The soft click of Mercy’s shoes against the tile floor brought Junkrat’s head up. She was standing in front of him with a clipboard clutched in her hands. “I heard you took quite a fall as well.” She raised an eyebrow at him. “When were you planning on coming in for a checkup, Jamison?”

Junkrat cringed slightly at his name. It wasn’t often someone used it and it was so odd to hear in such a formal way. He let the heavy metal fall into his lap, bringing a mechanical hand to the back of his neck and brushing the strands of hair there bashfully. “Ah, well. Time’s money, ain’t it? Won’t have much of either if I keep standin’ around.”

Mercy’s gaze fell to the damaged prosthetic and she clicked her tongue. “If you decide to come sooner than later I can give you a quick replacement and an excusal from staying here any longer. Just for now. Yes?”

Junkrat’s eyes brightened at the offer but he leaned toward her, acting as though he was deep in thought. “Yeah….” he murmured, “Yeah! I’ll take it.”

Mercy turned on her heel, scribbling something onto her notepad and walking off past the array of dim lights. Junkrat leaned back, hands gliding over the cold metal of his disconnected leg. He laid gentle eyes on Mei and found himself plunged back into the moment of action with her.

The rage he felt when he had seen those _men_ on her, stepping over her like she was just another part of the ground. The feeling of her soft fingers against the palm of his hand… Junkrat looked down at the flesh, stretching his fingers out to gaze at the thick of his palm. He could still feel the warmth from her touch. The way she _smelled._ Like mint and violets and blood and _life._ It was so intoxicating, warming. The way her eyes glittered in the dull light, swimming with tears that he had assumed were an afterthought from the fear of the fight but now he toyed with the idea that it _just might_ have been because she was worried about him.

The idea fell from his mind as he rolled his head back, closing his eyes. **_Nah,_ ** he thought, **_why’s someone like her gonna worry about a guy like me?_ ** Still, the idea was warming. He felt his face heat up again and for once he was actually glad for the thick layer of soot, dirt and blood that covered his face because he was sure he had bloomed as red as a rose.

Mercy’s shoes finally came back into earshot and he dropped his head back to his chest, eyes opening wearily. She was holding something white. White and glossy. Nothing like the clunky material his leg had been made of. It was an awkward shape, the part that would connect to his thigh actually looked like a formed cage of thick cords, criss crossed in a bulging way that mimicked the look of muscle. It tapered into some sort of metal joint and then a leg, curved the way an animal’s does, in a deformed ‘c’. Junkrat’s brow furrowed.

“Whassat?”

“Your temporary prosthetic.”

“It’s all…” Junkrat didn’t know how to describe it. It wasn’t a design he’d seen before and it was too sleek. Too shiny. He wrinkled his nose, the corner of his lip rising to bare a sharp canine.

“Whatever you think it is, I assure you it will be more comfortable than having to walk around on crutches.”

Junkrat was about to argue until he saw the fair point in her words. Without his hands free there would be no way to tinker, to delve freely into projects that required a physical and emotional balance. And so many of his project involved himself.

“Yeah, yeah. Alright. It’s only temporary.” He allowed her to come forward with a telltale release of tension from his posture. He slumped backwards, pushing his hips out towards the edge of his seat and sliding a hand under the leg that needed care. Mercy fastened the prosthetic with quick fingers, wrapping and buckling the polished plastic to the ropey muscle of his thigh. When she was done he flexed it, surprised at the responsiveness.

He pushed himself up and Mercy offered her help which he shook off. She took a step back instead, fingers clasped. The first step made him wobble, the elasticity of the new leg was something he’d have to get used to if only for a bit. It drew him up to full height and he slouched forward, as if he were unsure of what to do with the rest of himself. His other leg had been just a tad shorter, giving him that loping gait but now he walked with ease and it was… odd. A low grumble made it out of his mouth. Mercy looked pleased at the progress.

“Now!” She chirped, clapping her hands together lightly, eyes brighter than before. “Get a good night’s rest. Doctor’s orders!”

Junkrat stole a glance at Roadhog and Mercy did too, as if reading his thoughts. “He can stay here until he wakes. I will be in and out to check on multiple things, a close observation will be needed in this ward.”

Junkrat let out a soft breath. On one hand, Roadhog would be irritated that Junkrat didn’t wake him. On the other, Roadhog took delicate care with being roused from sleep as he had a tendency to become violent if woken too quickly and Junkrat was awfully tired. He felt his bones ache, burdened with bruises. A short nod from him and he turned away from both his companions. Something unknotted in his stomach at the thought of Roadhog staying in the medbay. **_She’s gonna be safe._**

\--

Roadhog’s fingers had loosened significantly on the great hook next to his belt and when it clattered to the floor he started, sitting up in a rigid anger and snarling low and deep at nothing in particular. When he had assessed what the “threat” was and leaned to pick it up from its place on the floor, he noticed just how dark it had gotten outside. And the absence of Junkrat.

It wasn’t necessarily alarming but it was an odd feeling not to be in the presence of the lanky Junker. His hook slipped easily into the crook of his belt and he turned in his seat, staring at the sleeping form of Mei. A gold light bathed her, making the freshness of her cheeks and puckered pink of her lips come alight in an attractive glow. Roadhog stood slowly, letting his back pop and crack before rolling his neck to the side and drawing similar sounds from the bones there.

He drew himself up to his full height before making towards the door. But only a single step towards it and he stopped. His mask turned, gaze thrown over his shoulder toward the sleeping woman lying on the powder blue sheets behind him. With a soft growl he turned towards her. He stayed rooted to the spot for a few moments, deciding whether to leave immediately or stay for just a bit longer. As if deciding for him, his feet walked forward. He came to the side of her bed, the soft rumble of his breathing breaking the thin silence of the room.

Her body was curled to the side, hand placed on her cheek, lips parted. Her hair had been taken out from her bun, the chocolate strands spread over her pillow in small curls. Roadhog leaned in slightly, staring at her. He clenched his jaw under the mask. She looked so _small_ when she slept. He knew how tiny she was, standing just below the middle of his chest when she stood in front of him. But now she seemed to shrink in size, especially without her gear. Her face scrunched and a soft groan slipped from her. Roadhog took a wary step back, knowing just how well most people didn’t want to wake up to a monstrous hulking figure hovering over them. But she didn’t wake, not just yet. Instead she rolled over, stretching her body out and nuzzling her face into the hand that Roadhog had placed at the edge of her bed. He froze. His heart thudded in his chest, heavy beats that sounded like thunder in his ears and he drew in a growling breath, swallowing the urge to yank his hand back from the steady warmth of her cheek. She had placed her head over his knuckles, the strands of her hair tickled the flat of his hand.

He stood frozen for what felt like an eternity. The soft form of Mei sleeping on the back of his hand. When he finally relaxed he reached up with his free hand to unbuckle the bottom strap of his mask, lifting it up ever so slightly. The clear coverings on the eyes of his mask were meant for combat, not close quarters where the metallic rumble of his breath had become so loud that he worried he would wake up Mei. He pushed the mask onto his forehead, making sure that just in case she woke up his eyes were still covered by the snout.

His hand rolled under her, palm turning to cup her silky cheek in his calloused palm. He lifted her head gently and placed it on her pillow, slowly slipping his fingers out from under her. She stirred again, this time her eyes fluttered open. Too quick for Roadhog to withdraw from view.

She took in the frozen state of his hand, fingers outstretched gently as if he had reached to cradle her head. Her gaze flicked groggily up to him, half his face now visible under an unbuckled mask. What had he been doing?

“Roadhog?” She mumbled, moving to prop herself up on an elbow. She felt mushy and bleary from medication.

Roadhog said nothing, hoping that she’d perhaps fall back asleep and forget he was there. But no, she was blinking sleep out of her eyes and focusing her vision and-- Her eyebrows raised a bit. Her gaze was locked on his face. He reached up to slam the mask back down, a low grunt of disapproval rumbling forth. Mei looked offended.

“Why?” She asked.

That took him by surprise. He blinked, unbeknownst to her. “Why?” He repeated, the tone of the mask now obscuring his voice, coating it with a heavy snarl. Mei withdrew, fear dancing in her face for just a moment and Roadhog felt a pang of guilt.

“I-I wouldn’t…” she began, her words lost before she said them.

“You stared. I don’t like staring.”

“Because I have not ever seen what you look like! When you make something so secret, the idea becomes desirable!” Mei winced at her word usage, she didn’t mean to say he was _desirable_ but he repeated her odd word and his voice was laced with an arrogance that suggested a smirk under the mask.

“Desirable.”

Mei’s mouth twitched. She felt it was time to change the subject and rescue her face from becoming overheated. “You carried me didn’t you? After I fell?”

A pause. Roadhog nodded slowly.

“Ah,” Mei looked away, her fingers toying with the thin blankets covering her legs. “Thank you.”

There was an even longer pause and the air felt heavy. Mei could feel her heart pump embarrassment into her veins, heating them with a fire. Finally, Roadhog shifted his hand raising to give her an odd sort of thumbs up. Her brow twitched in confusion. She giggled.

With that, he turned to leave. But Mei wasn’t done, “Wait!”

He stopped, back turned to her.

“Why can’t I at least have your real name?”

Roadhog turned ever so slowly, the thick glass of the mask’s eyes glinting viciously in the light and she grew cold. Was that too much to ask? Had she gone too far? They were so secretive, perhaps that was something considered extremely rude. But she knew Junkrat's name so why not-- She gaped at him when he slowly reached his hands up to the back of his head.

He tugged the mask away with a massive grip and in the low light and the distance, Mei struggled to make out his features. He was… handsome? Mei blinked. The whiteness of his hair was mimicked in a stubble that covered his jaw, a jaw that was thick with muscle and now stood clenched tight. His eyes were dark, a broad nose sloping down from an angular brow that met with plump lips stretched over his tusks. Mei sucked in a breath, wanting desperately for him to step into the light but knew that was pushing her luck dangerously far. She nodded, eyes wide and he replaced the mask and took his leave.

Mei laid herself back on her bed in a daze, the answer to the question that had plagued the forefront of her mind for days had been answered with something she had not expected. Yet she wondered why as she sank numbly back into the pillows, that he had chosen to unveil his features instead of tell her his name.

  
As she drifted back to sleep, the throbbing ache of her head thrumming mutely in the back of her mind, she realized that her personal goal to stay clear from the two Junkers was going to be left unrealized.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry, she'll get to see it better sometime soon!


	8. A Favor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this one's short and I'm sorry I'm a day late in updating this! I got really stuck on how to progress but I've got it now and the next chapter should be MUCH longer. Prepare yourselves.

When Mei awoke from her sleep she felt much better. Her head was down to a soft ache and Mercy told her it was mostly a surface wound at this point. She touched the back of her head gingerly, wincing with the light pain. She was discharged from Mercy’s constant attention under the circumstances she did not engage in vigorous physical activity for a few more days. With plenty more sleep and rest, Mercy assured her she would be physically fine.

However the dreams that teetered on the edge of nightmares were beyond Mercy’s control. Mei knew this so she kept quiet about it. What could Mercy do, anyhow? They had plagued her since the first night in the medbay. They lessened now, the medication she had been taking for the pain had enhanced them at first. Still, she woke some nights in cold sweats, breathing hard, trying to shake the image of the men looming over her from her mind.

She found herself in her room, sitting comfortably on her bed while  Snowball was cradled in her cupped hands. She could read, she supposed, keep her mind from wandering to places she didn’t want it to go. She rubbed Snowball’s side with a thumb, humming a soft tune as her eyes wandered her room for a particular book. It was… not where she usually left it. She slid to her feet, trying to remember the last time she had seen her copy of _Alice in Wonderland._ She would take it out sometimes, sure. A reading on the deck of the base or in a cozy armchair nestled in the library. She set Snowball down in their charging pad, moving a few things here and there, searching for her book.

Where could it be? She backtracked in her memory, the fuzzy details of the first day she got it popped into her mind. She had read part of it in the library, moved to the living area and then the kitchen because she was hungry-- She suddenly remembered the last time she had seen it with a low gasp. The kitchen. The night she met Junkrat and Roadhog. She had set it down while she was cooking! Silently, she scolded herself for being so irresponsible, for not noticing a missing book sooner. It didn’t belong to her, which made it even worse in her mind. Would they know where it was? Winston was particular about the collection in the library and she knew better than to let him know one was missing. Especially such an old piece of literature. Mei tugged a loose jacket on, figuring it was better that she go investigate now instead of later.

Her legs protested when she walked the halls, still sore from her run in with danger. Junkrat would be the best to ask, she figured. She didn't want to let anyone know she had misplaced it. Mei knew that at this time of day Junkrat would be in the workshop. She also knew this because she had heard him earlier, cussing up a storm when something went wrong and madly giggling when something went right. 

The workshop was well lit, to her surprise. She was sure that Junkrat had an affinity to dimly lit rooms or no light at all. But he was hunched over a table, a bright lamp beaming down on him and Mei took a moment at the great doorway to watch him. The muscles of his back rolled under his browned skin, peppered with freckles. He was working on something in front of him, something blocked from Mei's view. He grunted softly, taking in a sharp hiss and yanking his hand back to shake it as if something had hurt him. Something worried twisted in Mei when she heard that. He laid both his hands on the workbench, fingers spread on either side of a jumble of metal and twisted bits of wire, tools poked out from thick canvases that covered the half of his workplace. Powder coated the table and half of his body, Mei noted. The acrid smell of explosives and singed hair tickled Mei’s nose. She sneezed and he whirled around, eyes wide.

“Oh. Just you. Scared me for a moment, thought you were the doc.”

Mei raised an eyebrow, not budging from her spot. “Is she against this?”

“Ach, well,” Junkrat rubbed the back of his head, leaving black powder in his blond hair. “Might be another worry on her head.”

Mei’s eyes fell to the new prosthetic on his leg, the white metal was now smudged with dirty handprints, the pristine color had turned a dull grey. She squinted at him disapprovingly, the corner her mouth tugging back into a frown. He should really take better care of his things.

“Junkrat do you remember the first night we met?”

He had turned back to his table, fiddling with something and the question brought a careful gaze over his shoulder. “Yeah,” he began, “Yeah, why?” He sure remembered. The smell of her cooking wafted lazily back into memory bringing with it the frightened look she had shot at him when he towered over her in the kitchen. The way she sat in the chair next to him, stiff with unease and caution. Now she had the same feel about her but it was… just a bit different? She was cautious but the unease was absent and she seemed to be comfortable leaning against the doorway, shoulder pressed to the wood.

Junkrat turned to stare at her, placing his hands behind him to support himself on the table. She was watching him but her gaze flitted to the ground when his eyes met hers.  

“I-I had a book with me. It’s very special and it is also not mine. I was wondering if you saw---”

“Yeah, I got it.”

Mei breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh, that is a relief. I can take it off your hands the next time you have a moment to get it?”

Junkrat’s mouth twitched as if he was suppressing a smile. “Way I see it, mate,” he began, “you went and forget about it. So in the justification of ‘finders keepers’, it’s mine now.”

Mei’s brow furrowed, her mouth dropped open. “It’s.. It’s not even mine!”

“You’re right, it’s mine.”

Mei felt annoyance bubble up in her chest, if this lanky Junker was toying with her-- She sucked in a deep breath.

Junkrat wanted to grin at the sight of her. Her brow pinched for a moment, then furrowed. Her lips parted, pouting slightly and Junkrat’s eyes fell to them, admiring the way her mouth twitched into a frown. When he found her gaze, she was staring at him angrily. Sure, he was toying with her but the idea of him pushing her buttons so successfully gave him a giddy thrill. He lifted a piece of metal, busying himself with wiping it down as she calculated what to say next. He cut her off anyway.

“We can come t’an agreement,” he shot her a glance, his eyes sparkling mischievously. “I’ll give it to ya if you’ve got something to give me.”

Mei’s eyes narrowed behind her glasses and she studied him for a moment before responding. She figured that this was the way he was used to things. Snagging stuff and keeping it for himself until something of equal or better value came along. “What do you want?”

  
To this, Junkrat shrugged, the edges of his mouth curling down in a mock frown for a moment. “Leavin’ that part up to you. What’s it worth?”

Mei gave a low huff, wringing her hands together in irritation. “Fine!” She muttered, glaring at him. Junkrat’s mouth spread into a wide grin, his amber eyes glowing molten with excitement.

She figured she knew just what he wanted. So with a tilt of her head and an edge she tried to keep from her voice she decided, “I will meet you here tomorrow. This time.”

Junkrat’s eyebrows shot up. He had expected more resistance to his offer. Mei took her leave then, her face still dark with irritation but Junkrat let that grin spread into a triumphant smirk. She could feel the arrogance of his victory follow her out the door.

 

\--

 

Junkrat was undeniably never on time unless by chance he happened across the event he was due at. This time though, he had ushered himself toward the workshop early, getting some time in to tinker with his project before Mei arrived. When she did, he was surprised to see her holding a large basket. One that was nearly half her size. Before he could question her, however, she gave him a small smile. Junkrat liked that smile. It curled the edges of her mouth, making her soft lips pout just a bit.

Mei knew exactly what Junkrat would want. Or at least what would loosen his metaphorical grip around her book: food. Now she held a basket of it, stuff she had baked and cooked in the kitchen for hours the day before. Her fingers dove into the basket, pulling off the cloth cover. In reality, she had never seen Junkrat and Roadhog eat with the rest of the team before. It worried her secretly. There were times where she’d make herself a plate of food and wonder if she shouldn’t bring some to the Junkers. Those thoughts were quickly abandoned, however. **_They are adults. They can do things for themselves._ ** So the amount of food she had decided to give him was based on the worry he was malnourished. Not that Mei would ever admit that to anyone but herself, if even then.

Junkrat’s eyes lit up, mouth dropping into a round ‘o’ as he eyed the contents of the basket. Mei’s smile curled up just a tad more at the look on his face and she pushed it into his hands. He gazed almost lovingly down at the mounds of food and looked back up at her. He dove in almost immediately, grabbing at pieces and chunks of the food and shoving them in his face with a speed Mei could only describe as both incredible and disgusting. She wrinkled her nose, averting her eyes as he chomped through half the basket before sitting back with a satisfied sigh.

Mei cleared her throat expectantly, holding out a hand. Junkrat blinked at her, staring dumbly at it. A slow smile creeped onto his lips. A wicked sort of cleverness that spiked Mei’s heartbeat as she realized just what he was about to say next.

“Thanks, mate. Ain’t gonna cut it though.”

Mei almost screamed in frustration but instead she took to muttering dark insults in chinese under her breath. “That took me several hours!”

“And I appreciate it. But like I said, something of equal value. Food is a pretty common gift, yeah? Somethin’ tells me this book,” He reached behind him, snagging the volume off the table to wave it aloft. Mei grudgingly stared at it, noting that it now had grease stains on the cover. “This book is worth more than something so easy.”

Her fingers curled into fists, cheeks heating up in her frustration. “What. Do. You. Want?” Her voice was strained, she was struggling to remain calm. To not blow up at him, hammer his chest (and perhaps his face) with her fists.

Junkrat eyed her for a moment, taking relish in the way she her cheeks had gotten so pink in her anger. Her nose scrunched when she got angry, glasses lifting with the movement. His eyes fell to her lips once again and she could feel his gaze grow hungry. As if he was deciding whether to devour her or let her go. She shivered but stood her ground, glowering at him.

“Tell ya what,” he slapped the book down on his leg, “how about you owe me one?”

Mei blinked, brow crinkling in confusion. “Owe you one?”

“Yeah. Reckon that’ll come in handy. Just one little favour, not much of anything really.”

Mei’s stomach turned. She didn’t have such a great feeling about that but she nodded curtly before she had a chance to think it over. Her bad feeling was solidified when his face broke into a devilish grin, eyes gleaming. He jutted the book into her hands so suddenly she stumbled back a few steps. With that he turned, hunching over his work once more with only a wave to dismiss her.

She clutched the book to her chest, chewing on the inside of her cheek as she took her leave.

  
What had she agreed to?


	9. A Bed of Roses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise I'll start updating this regularly. I'm thinking every other day?

_Just one little favor._ His words left a gnawing feeling of unease in her stomach as she walked back to her room. _Not much of anything really._

The way he had shrugged, the gleam of his eyes. It was... _discomforting._  Still her heart buzzed in anticipation. She found herself thumbing through the book in her hands, perched in a sunny crook of the garden that Winston had started. It ran mostly bare now, he was so busy with other things that the poor garden had died out. Mei would come here sometimes just to water a few things that were still clinging to life. The roses, she noted, were doing fantastic no matter what.

They were in full bloom, the aromatic scent was heavy around her, almost intoxicating. Her mind swam with sleep, and she struggled to stay awake under the warmth of the sun but it was just so hard. She felt herself slipping, head leaning back into the heated brick behind her, body relaxing. Just a nap. A teensy nap.

\--

Junkrat pawed through the remains of the basket, forcing himself away from the rest of the buns had been torture but he wanted to share some with Roadhog. He scooped the basket into his hip and loped off, locking the door of the workshop behind him. Sure, it was the “community” workshop but nobody really wanted to go in there when Junkrat’s stuff was now strewn over the floor. Any step could prove a disastrous liability to one’s health as he had a tendency to leave live bits of explosives about the place. He knew this too, that’s why he did it.

He strutted down the hallways, walking awkwardly on his new prosthetic. His newest one was almost done. This one forced him to walk straighter, it made him feel strange. Too tall.

The light was fading fast, sinking behind the horizon with a muted brilliance of colors. Junkrat regarded the dim skies with a sort of irritation. With the night came the cold. Junkrat didn’t necessarily like the cold. He clutched the basket closer to himself, the thick strands of woven fibers scratching at his skin. **_Room's not far now_** , he thought to himself, **_don't leave me now, ya shiny bastard_**. He took a turn through the garden as a shortcut and nearly stopped in his tracks when he was hit with a heavy scent of roses. It washed over him, calming his senses. He felt sluggish suddenly, as if the exhaustion from today came crashing onto him. The lingering warmth of the day danced over his skin, baked into the bricks that made up the garden’s walls.

He pressed on, slower now, head turning to admire the thick bushes of untrimmed roses that burst from the planters. They were washed in a dull gold color of the sunset, their red petals velvety soft in the low light. He might have stopped, if he had any focus on their beauty. But his eyes were locked on a small figure tucked away in the curve of a wall. His eyebrows knitted together. Was that…? As he neared his mouth twisted into a smirk, she was nestled in the small nook of the wall, curled up around her book. Her hair was falling from her bun, the hairstick she used to hold it together was sloping in the loose strands. She was fast asleep.

He set the basket down, creeping slowly up to her. The dull clack of his prosthetic made an ugly noise on the bricks that gave him the urge to grind his teeth in irritation. He pulled some of his weight off it, softening the steps as he got closer to her.

“Oi,” he shook her shoulder, she barely stirred. “Mei.”

It was probably the first time he had said her name out loud. Still she did not wake. He straightened up to look around. It was dark and getting colder by the second. She was wearing a white tank top and her usual leggings. Her thick boots had been shed for a pair of slippers that didn’t seem to be doing much to warm her.

Junkrat sucked in a breath, deciding on what to do. He picked up the basket again, eyeing her before turning away to dash off hurriedly towards his room. “Don’t move, I’ll be back.” He told her over his shoulder as if she could hear him.

He pushed the door open, dropping the basket onto the floor of his room. Roadhog’s mask shot up, leering in Junkrat’s direction from the comfortable position he had on the bed.

“She’s out there, asleep. Bloody stupid, if you ask me.” Junkrat shook his head, “Wouldn’t usually bother but it’s cold, Hog. What do we do?”

Roadhog paused for a moment. It was odd, perhaps, the way one always knew what the other was talking about even if the subject wasn't specified. “Wake her up.”

“Won’t. I tried, mate. Didn’t budge an inch.”

Roadhog sat up slightly, a low growl of a sigh filtering through his mask. He jerked his head towards the door. Junkrat slipped back out without a word, rushing to the spot he left Mei. She was shivering now, the cold bit at Junkrat’s naked arms as he curled one of them around her back and the other under her tucked legs. He hoisted her up with a grunt, cradling her close to his chest. She was heavier than he anticipated, built solid with muscle. He adjusted his stance and walked slowly back to the room, eyes locked on her sleeping face.

When he got to the door, he stared at Roadhog. The larger man slid to the floor, massive form lumbering towards the doorway. He closed the door behind his companion and held out his arms to scoop Mei into them.

“Make the bed, she’s sleeping there.”

Junkrat’s eyes narrowed, “y’must be mental, mate. She can take the couch, no way I’m sharing. It’s _my_ bed!”

“It’s _our_ bed. Do as I say.”

With a hiss Junkrat hobbled forward. He was about to pull the covers over the bed and call it a day until Roadhog gave a growl. “Rat. New sheets, do it right.”

A groan. Junkrat hated making beds. “I don’t know if we have sheets!”

“We do. Shut up and hurry.”

Junkrat grumbled a few curses under his breath, shoving his hands into creaky drawers until he found something acceptable thick blue sheets made of a sort of fleece. Junkrat had never seen them before but then again, he and Roadhog didn’t do much of any sort of bed making. He ripped the covers off of the bed. It was lumpy and uneven but it served its purpose as a place to sleep. He spread the new cloth out over it, taking little care in tucking the sides down and fluffing the blankets. When that was done, Roadhog delivered Mei between them. She gave a small sound of satisfaction and curled into the pillows, still clutching her book. The men didn’t try to take it from her, she was happy enough with it. Junkrat tugged her glasses off though, giving them a frown as he set them on the table.

“Yeah, this is great an’ all but where are we gonna sleep, Hog?”

Roadhog pointed to the floor. Junkrat gave a loud enough groan it elicited a nasty glare from behind the mask. “The _floor?_ But this is my own room!”

Nothing. Roadhog turned away to plop down on the couch. Junkrat glared.

“Oh, yeah, I gotta sleep on the cold ground but you, _you_ get the bloody sofa like you’re the damn king of the place, don’t ya?” Junkrat muttered to himself, punching a mechanical arm into his pillow before setting it grudgingly at the floor.

Roadhog’s mask hissed softly; the telltale sign it was being removed. He clicked the light off, the couch groaning under his movements.

\--

Junkrat awoke to whimpers. Soft ones that were full of fear, the kind that you hear helpless things make in a moment of agony. He blinked groggily, stiff from his sleep on the floor. It was still dark, the moon shone through their skylight, washing the room in a silvery glow. He grasped the side of the bed, pulling himself up into a sitting position. **_What was that?_ **

A gentle cry and more whimpers, slightly muffled but followed with a shuddering breath like someone was holding back a sob. He turned slightly, eyes searching the bed. Mei's form, washed in the glow of the moonlight, rested next to him. Her face was scrunched up, eyebrows knitted in worry, mouth pressing down at the corners. She whimpered again and Junkrat was wide awake suddenly, his hand reaching to shake her shoulder but stopping short a few inches from her.

She muttered something in chinese, something soft and heartbroken by the sound of it. It made Junkrat’s throat feel painful. His chest twinged and he let his hand drop onto her arm. He ran a thumb along the soft skin there, reveling at the silkiness of it. His eyes were locked on her face, now going through a range of expressions as she slept. She was taut and stiff, trembling delicately.

“S’alright.” He murmured, perching his chin on the edge of the bed. His voice was heavy with sleep. He laid his arm on the sheets, resting his head in the crook of it. “You’re alright. Nothing’s gonna happen t’you here.”

He knew how nightmares went. You needed something to bring you back. Sometimes it was a voice that your subconscious turned into a guiding light in your dream. Sometimes you could just plain hear the person talking to you. Either way, it seemed to work a quiet recovery on Mei because her body relaxed, hands loosening from fists. The book had been pushed away in her sleep and now she reached for Junkrat’s hand, laying gentle fingers on it.

He almost jerked it away, not used to such a soft touch. But as her fingers buried themselves under his grip, he indulged in the closeness. He wasn’t used to something so gentle, his skin felt odd where she touched it. Like a pleasant fire that prickled and sparked through from the areas her fingers brushed. Junkrat swallowed, eyes following the length of her arm, up to her shoulder, the dip of her neck... She was _beautiful._ She smelled of lingering roses and mint and fire. He breathed her in, amazed at the life that seemed to radiate from her. After a moment, Junkrat tore his gaze away from her, tugging his hand off hers and laying back against the floor, fingers folded across his chest. His heart was thrumming, mind buzzing pleasantly. It felt like hours before he was able to sleep again.

\--

Mei woke to a wash of pale light. When her eyes opened, she was met with the blurry outlines of an unfamiliar room. **_Where?_ ** Came the groggy thought. She sat up, groping around her for her glasses. Her fingers bumped a table next to the bed and finally, the plastic rims of her spectacles. She shoved them on, blinking slowly.

Roadhog was sleeping in the corner, face half covered by a massive arm. She could see his mouth and jaw relaxed in his sleep. Unease pooled in the pit of her stomach. She dragged her eyes around the room, searching for his companion. A soft movement from the side of the bed drew her gaze down. Junkrat was spread out on the floor, one hand shoved down his trousers, mouth slack, a pool of drool was collecting under his turned cheek.

Mei felt confused. The momentary fear melted away, leaving behind questions. She leaned down, hand outstretched to shake the Junker awake.

“Don’t.”

She froze, eyes widening. A shift and a creak from the sofa told her Roadhog was awake. His voice sounded so different without the mask. The metal snarl was gone, leaving behind something base rich, pleasant. Sleep rumbled in his throat, giving his words a muted edge. He sounded…. Nicer.

“He won’t wake up, anyway. If he does, he’ll be angry. Let him sleep.”

Mei’s gaze lifted slowly, millimeter by millimeter. The floor, the bottom of the couch. She almost counted each thread on the way up. His massive hands brushing against the flannel of his pajama pants-- (Mei noted then, that he actually wore _pajama pants_ ). The thick ropes of muscle on his arm, his jaw, dappled in white stubble that stood in such a contrast to his brown skin. The scars that crisscrossed the length of his face. She snapped her eyes to his. They were so dark, she saw nothing in them and perhaps to someone else it might have been chilling but she thought they looked warm, perhaps even soft. His face was calm, void of expression and Mei felt as though she might as well have been staring into his mask again. It seemed his eyes were the only exception to the usual vacancy of emotion.

“S-Sorry,” she managed, tucking her hand back underneath her and straightening in the bed. “Um--?”

“You fell asleep in the garden,” Roadhog dragged his mask from the tabletop, raising it halfway to his face before seeming to pause in an afterthought and instead dropping it back to where it was. “Reading.”

Of course. She recalled the hum of the warm afternoon sun. The intoxicating, sleep inducing smell of flowers. Her fingers brushed the spine of her book and she felt her face heat up.

“I’m sorry,” she murmured, “I always seem to be left to your care, don’t I?”

Roadhog said nothing. Mei assumed he was angry and she felt that unease gnaw at her again, burrowing its way into her veins. Her cheeks prickled with warmth. Roadhog’s eyes bored holes into her. She felt her breathing hitch and she wanted nothing more than to pull the covers over her and curl up, pretend she wasn’t there.

Finally, he spoke, “Rat doesn’t mind.” He shifted on the couch, the poor thing squealed in protest, “I don’t mind.”

Warmth bloomed over Mei. Her heart felt as though it was rushing around in her chest. She opened her mouth, eyes locked on her trembling hands. Why did she feel so…? She wasn’t sure what she felt, in all honesty. Just warm.

“Go back to bed. Don’t wake him up.” The sofa gave a squeak as Roadhog laid back once more. Mei eyed Junkrat, asleep on the floor, the puddle of drool growing larger by the moment. She would have laughed if it wasn’t for Roadhog’s warning so instead she smiled down at him. She snagged the edge of one of the blankets layering her and pulled it down, over his sleeping form. He stirred a bit, relaxing under the new warmth.

Mei stayed in the bed for what seemed to be hours, listening intently for Roadhog’s breathing to slow and steady into soft purrs of sleep. When it did, she slid off the opposite edge of the bed and crept out the door, book tucked under her arm.

  
She was grateful for their kindness but she decided it was better if she wasn’t there when they awoke.


	10. A Fuzzy Sort of Feeling

It was early morning when she slunk back into her room. Too early for anyone to be out. 4 am, perhaps? The sun yawned over the horizon and the cold bit into her skin, the sharp smell of the sea lingered in her nostrils even after she shut her door firmly. It was welcome, it helped clear her mind of the fuzziness that seemed to cling to the edges of her consciousness each time she saw the two Junkers.

She knew what it was, she wasn’t stupid. The way her heart seemed to hop towards them when she saw their faces. The way her legs felt just a bit weaker when Junkrat grinned, that gilded tooth of his glinting against harsh light. She denied it, buried it beneath her heart and scolded herself to be sensible. But it hummed happily now, in her chest. Singing against her ribs.

She placed a hand to her heart. The cold skin was such a contrast from how it felt inside. Like a fire roaring in a hearth, she noted. Or an explosion. She sucked in a breath, leaning her weight into the door and knocking the back of her head into the wood a few times. **_You idiot_**.

Junkrat and Roadhog were dangerous. Two men that had survived through a war Mei was only briefly exposed to. She didn’t understand it, she supposed. But their clear hatred of omnics was what frightened Mei. **_Nothing_** , she believed, **_deserved such pure, spiteful rage_**. Especially not those who were not the direct cause of the fate his country saw.

Something told her, softly and quietly, that it wasn’t her place to judge. But she batted it down, mouth twisting at the memory of the fury in Junkrat’s eyes as he saw the omnic, crumpled on the floor. She knew deep down that had she left him to do as he wished he would have ended their life. It boiled an anger in her and she felt guilty for the feelings she had so briefly experienced with the two of them. Her fingers dug into her chest, as if an attempt to remove the warmth that burned in her heart at the thought of them.

 ** _He is cruel._** She reminded herself, **_cruel and mean. A bully._**

It became a mantra, chanted softly in her head as she flicked through memories of the two in her mind as if trying to associate the words with the faces. ** _A bully, a bully, a bully._**

In the end, as much as she tried to convince herself, her heart still felt as though it made a mad dash towards her ribs each time she remembered Roadhog’s face or the way it felt to be cradled against Junkrat.

* * *

 

The chime to the callpad drew Mei out of her drowsy state. She had slung herself in her armchair to finish her book but the call made her perk up. She reached for the device, rubbing her eye under her glasses 

 _Mission debriefing in :30 minutes. Please be present, introductions are to be made._  
_\-  W_

Mei sighed. Work was never done, she supposed, and pulled herself to her feet to dress more appropriately.

When she arrived she seemed to be among the last. Each of her teammates were present, crowded together and laughing happily towards the doorway of the kitchen. Mei padded towards them, eyebrows pinching together in confusion. They parted when they saw her, happy greetings were exchanged and Mei smiled at each of them, warmed by the kind words.

Mercy rushed towards her, collecting her hand in her own and grinning. “Mei, there is someone I want you to meet,” she turned, pulling her gently towards the kitchen itself. “And another you will perhaps reacquaint yourself with, yes?”

A man, towering in size was bent over the stove, his broad shoulders drooping into a sizzling pan of pancakes that he seemed focused on making. A shock of white hair mussed from sleep matched the wrinkled white shirt pulled over his massive torso. The smell of food warmed the kitchen, bringing a growling hunger to Mei’s stomach.

Another was seated at the table, his hand wrapped around a mug of coffee. A cowboy? Mei almost laughed. He was handsome, sure enough. A thick red shawl was wrapped around his shoulders and his curved hat was placed on the table in front of him. He was laughing as they entered, a cigar rolling over his lips with the movement. Mercy cleared her throat politely and they turned.

Mei nearly cried out in surprise. “Reinhardt!” She dashed forward, arms outstretched, and he gave a great laugh, scooping her into a hug as she met him. The joy rumbled through his chest and Mei sobbed with happiness.

“Mei-Ling! A surprise I was not prepared for!”  
She grinned up at him. “You got old.”  
“And you did not!”

The grin faltered on her lips. Reinhardt’s brow creased momentarily but before he could ask, Mei was ushered towards the second man. He was leaning back against his chair but as she neared he sat up, holding a mechanical hand out to grasp hers.

With a charming smirk he gave a bow of his head and his introduction, “Name’s McCree.”

“Mei. It is nice to meet you.”

“Well, Mei, the pleasure’s all mine.”

Mercy piped up, standing expectantly behind Mei, her fingers clasped together. “Jesse is another recall that Winston has done a fantastic job in relocating to us.” McCree gave Mercy’s words a low grin but his eyes were locked on Mei. She fidgeted a bit under his gaze. “But come! There is one more you have to meet. You did a fantastic job in locating him on your mission to Rio de Janeiro, it is only fair that you finally meet!”

Mei gave Reinhardt and McCree an apologetic look and a wave as Mercy dragged her from the room. Reinhardt’s hearty laugh followed them out the door.

The person that Mercy had been so intent on introducing Mei to was a young man, just a little taller than Mei herself. He had a smile that looked so genuine plastered over his lips that Mei couldn’t help but let a gentle mimic of his happiness tug at her own mouth.

“Lucio!”  
“Dr. Zeigler, hello! Always a face I’m happy to see.”  
Mercy’s cheeks pinkened and she smiled politely. “Mercy will do just fine. I have come with just one other I would have you meet. This is Mei-Ling Zhou, she is a brilliant mind and a wonderful companion. Truly an addition to our team and a friend worth having.”

Mei felt warm, her cheeks reddened at Mercy’s compliments and she shyly extended a hand. “Hello! Lucio, right? I think I have seen you somewhere before?”

Lucio laughed, slipping a warm hand into Mei’s to shake it gently. “Probably. You can see my face plastered just about anywhere these days. Not that I’m really complaining but it doesn’t do much for my whole ‘on the downlow’ mission.”  
It clicked for Mei. She had seen his likeness hung on giant posters swinging from the buildings in Rio. Lucio, live in concert. “Oh! You’re a... Singer?”  
“DJ.” Lucio grinned.  
“I don’t think I’ve heard your music?”  
Lucio waved a hand, still smiling. “Ehh, that’s okay. Gives me an excuse to sit down for a jam session,” Lucio’s smile faltered only for a second, “I mean, if you’d be into that.”  
“I think I would be into that.” And his beaming smile was back again.

Mercy gave a satisfied sigh, content that everyone seemed to be getting along. A small beep to her callpad and she glanced down to it. 

 _Mission debriefing starting. Gather in the control room._  
_\-  W_

She motioned to Lucio and Mei who were still chatting animatedly together. They followed her to the meeting, quieting down and taking the seats left for them as Winston pulled up projected screens of their next mission.

Mei looked around, passing over the attentive faces of her peers and resting on the two in the corner. Junkrat and Roadhog had made it, though both of them were clearly uncomfortable amongst the rest. Junkrat was leaning against the wall, a dark scowl hardened his face. He was searching too, and when his eyes found Mei his face changed. He softened, a hand came up to wave at her. Mei waved back, a small smile stealing a tug from her lips before she was able to bat the feeling down and scold herself for being so friendly to him. Winston began the presentation and Mei was grateful to direct her attention elsewhere.

“I think we can say that both missions were a success thanks to the hard work of our teams.” Winston nodded towards everyone and a few smiles of gratitude met him, “but our jobs aren’t done. We’ve established a connection with a few other agents, some are en route by themselves, others need to be dug out. This, however is something different. Talon has seized Watchpoints. Certain bases that were once ours but now lie in abandonment. We can’t let them take any sort of information away from these Watchpoints, there is still critical information buried in the terminals left at the stations.”

“Seems like a careless thing t’do,” Junkrat piped up from the back. A few of the teammates turned, looking over at him. Tracer rolled her eyes. Winston cleared his throat, ignoring the interruption.

“Obviously we aren’t back at full capacity. There are still a lot of aspects missing from the restoration of Overwatch. With that being said, we need to now direct our attention to the protection of information left in the facilities. There’s still stuff in there that could endanger the lives of ex and reinstated agents”

Mercy took her cue to pass around the folders to each person. Winston continued, “Inside these will be the names of your fellow teammates that you will be working with on this missions. It’s simple and dangerous, you’ll need to locate the servers, download the information and destroy what’s left. Each teammate will get a key,” Mei pulled a thin drive from the folder, studying it, “these keys, once plugged into the server will download the information and allow ATHENA to connect, cover and destroy whatever is left. Do not lose them.”

Mei turned her attention back to the folder. Skimming over the details. 

 _TEAM: Mei-Ling Zhou, Lena Oxton, Lucio Correia dos Santos_  
_SUB TEAM: Junkrat, Roadhog._

  
Sub team? Mei glanced up, eyes searching for her new teammates. She furrowed her brow in question at Tracer who shrugged. Mei flipped a page, looking for an answer. As if reading her confusion, Winston answered.

“Some of you have noticed the sub teams. This just means that you will be working in a larger group than others until the point is located. From there, the sub teams have a different goal and will break off from the whole to accomplish it. You all will regroup after each team is done.”

Mei scrunched her nose. She supposed the lack of explanation was due to something secretive. What Junkrat and Roadhog would be trusted to keep secret was beyond her, however. Perhaps it could be chalked up to the fact that Winston was overwhelmed with trying to keep the growing team together and organized. For whatever reason, Mei trusted her teammates. Well… mostly.

She leafed through the pages, reading carefully and studying the maps. She knew that most of the information was going to be transferred to her datapad but she still familiarized herself with some of it. Just to be safe. 

 _Departure at 18:00 hours._  
_Arrival at 19:30 hours._

An hour and a half in the air. Mei shuddered and closed the file, gathering her things as she waited for dismissal.

* * *

 

The sun was still looming in the distance as she paced the hangar. Mei had strapped herself in, ready to go thirty minutes too early. She had spent the day making minor modifications to Snowball and they beeped from her pack, signalling their readiness. She patted them, snuggling into her seat and cracking open her book, waiting for the rest of her team to settle in for the flight.

They piled in slowly, Lucio giving Mei a cheery “hello, hello!” before taking a seat next to her. Tracer zipped around the cabin. The harness prevented her from flying but she’d be damned if she didn’t thoroughly inspect the ship before heading out. ‘Old habits die hard’ she had said, peeringly longingly towards the pilot’s seat. Junkrat loped in alongside Roadhog and Mei took note of his leg, the sleek prosthetic now replaced with a clunky peg of wood, the metal was unpainted and still rough. But it resembled the one he had broken with just a few modifications to the shocks and pivot. Whatever made him happy, she shrugged. Personally, she had liked the temporary one better.

When they touched down, Mei had already unbuckled her harness, jumping up and out of her seat to rush towards the door. The earth was always missed in her flights and the quicker she could set her feet on solid ground, the better she felt. Once everyone was rebriefed and addressed their orders, they were dismissed into the field.

The sky was dark, the last reaches of the sun sinking dully into a blanket of dusky black in the horizon. It was cold and Mei was grateful for the thick fur that lined her coat as the breeze kissed her cheeks. She followed her team silently, watching as the blue glow of Tracer’s harness zipped forward, far ahead of them, scouting for danger. Lucio drifted next to Mei, a low volume song thrummed from the speakers attached to his back and the modified handheld one he had slung at his hip.

When it was deemed safe, they all stopped at the entrance of the Watchpoint. Heavy doors blocked their entrance. Tracer went to work, shimmying past the securities with a phonelike device she held above the keypad to the door.

“ _Access granted._ ”

The doors unbolted, a thundering sound that hummed in the silent air and Mei held her breath as Tracer and Lucio eased them open. The tension left a sharp taste in her mouth. The darkness that loomed beyond the door made Mei’s heart feel as though it was trying to crawl from her, back to safety. But she leveled her gun, the thick hose patting her thigh as she walked forward through the doors.

They group stood there for a moment, adjusting to the darkness before Tracer clicked on a light attached to her shoulder. It washed the room in a warm yellow, out of place and unwelcome from the years of abandonment the place had suffered. Mei followed suit, her beam wiggling its way over the sheets that had gathered cobwebs and dust. She dug into her pocket, pulling up the datapad and clicking the screen to life.

5 little dots flickered on her screen, all grouped together. Their destination pulsed a soft orange, lost in a maze of hallways and doors. She turned to the rest, waiting for any sort of command that would push them forward.

“Right,” Tracer started, her voice low. She was holding a similar device to Mei, “Well, Junkrat and Roadhog you’ve got your orders, yeah? Let’s start there. Looks like you’re off to the western end while Mei, Lucio and I have got about a mile of hallways to get through.”

She nodded in the direction of the pulsing light on her screen. “Reckon we go about here, loves. Might as well.”

With a nod to the parting teammates she skipped forward, the flashlight blinking with her. Mei turned to Junkrat and Roadhog, watching them. Junkrat grinned, fingers loosening the straps on his grenades as they turned to start their mission.

“Hey,” Roadhog’s rumbling voice made her turn slightly, “be careful.”  
Mei felt warm. She gave a nod, “you too.”

They parted and the feeling of worry that was so familiar amongst the missions started to gnaw at Mei.

They made quick progress, surprisingly. The mute hum of cautiousness danced around the trio, eased only by the low, heavy beats of Lucio’s song. It was calming and Mei was grateful for it. When they reached the outer edges of the room that supposedly held their goal, Tracer leaned into the wall next to the doorway. They were bathed in darkness as the lights had been clicked off prior to arrival. Mei adjusted her glasses, finger hovering over the trigger of her gun.

“Dunno if we’re gonna run into trouble but we go in fast, alright? I’ve gotcha backs, loves.”

With a deep breath they burst through the door, guns raised. The room was silent. Tracer straightened, twirling her guns on her fingers and sheathing them at her hips. Mei’s heart was roaring in her ears and it took a good few seconds to calm it.

“No one’s here?” Lucio whispered.  
“Does feel a bit off, donnit? Best be quick about it, though.”

They got to work quickly, each server was plugged into, encrypted data bombarding their datapads. Mei watched in wonder as Athena plugged herself in through their drives. It looked like numbers to her, just a wall of moving information that was a different language entirely. She looked over at her teammates. Their faces were washed in the soft glow of their datapads, the gentle light illuminating their focused expressions. She found her mind wandering to the other two that had separated themselves from the team and a quick I hope they are okay, flitted through her mind before she could stop it.

Her datapad chimed. _Transfer complete. Data erased from original location._ She wiggled the drive from the server, storing it safely in her jacket pocket. Her teammates seemed to be at a similar stage and they regrouped in the middle of the room.

“So far, so good!” Lucio chirped.  
“Let’s hope everything stays that wa--”

A cacophonous boom echoed through the compound. Mei’s heart leaped in her chest. She caught Tracer’s wide eyed look.

“Junkrat, Roadhog? Come in, come in!” Tracer’s fingers were pressed to her ear, her voice echoed in Mei’s earpiece.

“Welcome t’the party, fellas,” Junkrat’s voice, filtered and static, buzzed in Mei’s ear. She gave a sigh of relief. “Looks like ya friends decided to show up.”

“Where?”  
“West side, though I reckon they’ll be comin’ to you soon enough.”  
“We’re finished here. We’ll be comin’ to you so stay put!”  
“No hurry, me n’ Roadie will show ‘em a good time.”  
There was a low grumble. Roadhog’s response.  
“Aw shit, a _blast_. We’ll show ‘em a blast!” Junkrat’s shrill giggle was cut off by another thunderous explosion that shook Mei’s bones.

She felt scared. She knew they were more than capable of handling themselves in a fight. But it was the taking care of themselves she wasn’t so sure in. She made a lunge for the doorway, fear for her teammates coursing through her. Tracer and Lucio followed her.

Their dots were blipping on her map, here and there. Suddenly gone (each time this happened Mei felt her heart skip) and then reappearing. She supposed it was Junkrat throwing himself around that faltered the connection.

The raucous sound of gunfire, yells and explosions grew louder, drowning out the calm that lingered just moments before. Tracer zipped forward, guns chittering with fire as she dove into the fray. Lucio stayed on the flank, dipping in on his skates, a grin on his face as he cranked the music louder. Mei felt as though there were wings on her feet and she almost stumbled at her newfound speed, amazed. She raised her gun, running circles around the unfortunate enemies that tried to charge at her. Frozen to the spot, they gaped at her. She smiled sweetly, gave a small quip and fired an icicle point blank.

There weren’t as many as last time, she noted. She was grateful for that, and grateful for the amount of people on her own team. Perhaps they underestimated how quickly Overwatch would catch on to their plans. Mei didn’t want to overthink it.

Pausing for breath she surveyed the scene. Junkrat had found his way to the upper balcony of the room and was now firing away, that stupid grin plastered on his face. Roadhog was grappling enemies, drawing them in and firing his gun with a low, growling laugh. Mei shivered at the sound.

Tracer and Lucio combo’d in the further reaches of the room, Tracer hopping over a few of the remaining enemies and slapping Lucio’s outstretched hand as two of them went down.

The last one fell with a cry and Mei rotated the chamber on her gun to reload it with a sludgy blue liquid. They were safe.

It happened so fast. Tracer twisted around, catching Mei’s eye, the smile plastered on her face fell slowly and Mei felt her chest tighten.

A thick, looming smoke licked at her arms, sliding around her and she couldn’t breathe. She gaped, clawing at her throat, met with curls of the heavy substance. A low laugh growled in her ear.

“ _Pobrecita_ ,” came the voice. It growled low, menacing. She felt it in her chest, in her head. Thick fingers enclosed around her throat, squeezing, squeezing. “ _They can’t help you, it’s too late_.”

The edges of her vision grew blurry. She could see Tracer dash toward her, screaming her name. _She was too far_. Mei’s fingers crawled at her tank, struggling. _Come on_. She found it. With a strangled gasp she slammed down on it, feeling a rush of cold encase her legs and shoot up her sides. In just a moment, she was encased in ice.

The attacker had let her free with an angry grunt. Mei sucked in air, curled up within the cocoon. It was peaceful if only just for a second. She could hear the buzz of Tracer’s guns as she ran past her and someone was yelling, muffled through the thick layers of ice.

Junkrat had only seen her encased in ice. Tracer’s scream of “ _MEI_!” had drawn his attention and he searched the field for her, heart sinking when his eyes fell on a block of solid blue where she had been a moment before.

What had happened? Equipment malfunction? He threw himself off his ledge, panic coursing through his veins, ushering him forward. _Please be alright. Please be alright._ The thought thrummed in his head.

He reached her, hyands slamming onto the ice, clawing and scratching at it in an attempt to break her out.

“Mei!” He banged his fist against it, “ _MEI_!”

The ice crumbled suddenly, leaving a frightened Mei in the shards of it, breathing quickly and shallowly.  _She’s alive_. He grabbed her, fingers curling into her coat, grasping desperately at the fabric as he drew her to his chest. 

Suddenly, she was aware of the warmth. A shivering Junkrat holding her close, his arms encasing her in a desperate hug. Once she regained her ability to think straight she patted his back.

“Junkrat, please. I can’t breathe!”

He loosened his grip but didn’t let her go. “Thought you were gone for a mo’ there,” he muttered, his voice muffled by the folds of fur at her collar.

“Well, I’m not. I’m fine. Please let me go. You smell.”

He let her go with a bark of laughter, bright eyes searching her face and her heart was _singing_. He had been worried for her. She felt fuzzy and warm, barely registering Roadhog’s hand planting itself on her head.

“You alright?” He rumbled.

Mei nodded, fighting the urge to smile. He grunted and patted Junkrat away from her.

“Yeah, _ouch_ , hey! Yeah! Alright, leave me alone, mate. Just wanted t'make sure she was okay!”

Tracer was at her side in an instant along with Lucio. “Got away, the bugger. We’ve met him before. Reaper." She fidgeted with her guns, shifting her weight and looking around as if expecting someone else. After a second she turned back, a relieved grin on her face. "Quick thinking, Mei! Knew you could handle yourself!”

Lucio’s music eased a gentle rest into Mei and she nodded wearily, wanting nothing more than to be back at the base in her bed.

“We got all we came for, ready to head out?” Tracer ushered forth, trotting ahead of the group, head swinging back and forth like an alert puppy.

Mei walked between Roadhog and Junkrat, still dizzy with warmth. Her fingers tightened on her gun at the thought of Junkrat’s face, frightened and wild. He had been worried about her. She hummed with happiness against her better judgement.

Roadhog’s mask peeked down at her and she stared at him, a smile curling the edges of her lips. Her head leaned against his arm and he grunted, stepping just a bit closer to her as they walked back to the pickup.


	11. Unbidden

Mei had fallen asleep in the library for the third time that day. She roused herself slowly, blinking in the dim light of the room. She rubbed her eyes, taking her time to prop herself up as the sleep ebbed from her body. It left a fuzzy sort of state in her mind. She stood, pulling her loose jacket tighter around her and burying herself into the thick fur with a sigh.

 **_It would be nice to sleep in a bed tonight_ ** , she supposed. With that thought she shuffled out of the library, eyes half closed.

The walk to her room was slow, Mei periodically bumped into the wall, sleep heavy on her eyelids. The sun was still out, dipped low in the sky but it was bright enough for her to make her way through the base without much trouble and she was grateful for it. 

She was aware of the low hum of machinery building in steady volume as she neared the communal workshop. She felt more awake with the thought that Junkrat was perhaps fast at work inside there and before she could stop herself she dipped her head inside the doorway. He was there alright. Bent over his table, tongue stuck fast between his teeth and dashing over his lips when he’d find something particularly satisfying in his work. Beads of sweat glistened over his skin, leaving barely visible streaks as they cleared the layer of soot from his forehead and jaw. He straightened and leaned back, exhaling a soft breath and wiping his forearm across his brow.

Mei’s eyes were lost on the way his muscles roped taught at each detail he worked into his project, the sheen of sweat that glittered across his chest and arms. When he drew himself up she swallowed, following the lithe form of his chest with a timid gaze, only to stop at the deep ‘v’ of his hips. A small part of her wished he’d get a belt or at least tailor his pants to his waist.

Junkrat’s eyes flicked upward, the amber glint of his gaze sending a soft thrill into her heart and she stuttered an apology, “s-sorry, I just wanted to say hello.”

Junkrat’s brow pinched and relaxed. A curling grin pulled his lips apart into a gleaming smile and Mei felt her chest constrict. She cursed herself for being so easily felled by such small things, things exhibited by a man she really had no business associating with. She wrung her hands along her coat hem, suddenly wide awake.

“G’day, then.” Junkrat reached for the canteen on his hip, unlatching it and taking a swig. Mei’s nose wrinkled. He raised an eyebrow at her expression and shook the bottle in her direction to which she raised a hand and shook her head. “Don’t knock it just yet. Have a try.”

Mei stepped forward, tentatively sniffing the mouth of the flask. It was… sweet. The tangy, sharp scent of alcohol was not present as she had expected. So she took it from him, eyes searching his face for some sort of hint or warning that it was indeed a hard drink.

The first sip sent a familiar taste flooding into her mouth. Milk tea. It was followed with a mushy, chewy sensation from mounds of flavorless tapioca. Boba! Mei’s eyes brightened and Junkrat’s grin grew wider.

“It’s.... good,” she managed, swallowing the drink and handing it back to him.

“Yeah, I know.”  He clipped it back to his hip and leaned against his worktable, eyes locked on her. They stood in a thick silence for a few more seconds, Mei’s gaze wandered the floor, fingers turning over the edge of her jacket. She could feel him staring at her and it was making her cheeks flush with color.

“I guess-- I guess I have a question for you?” She found her voice, as shaky and soft as it was, and drew herself up to her full height (which wasn’t very tall compared to Junkrat).

“Shoot.” Junkrat had turned back to his project, fingers nimbly sticking bits and pieces of metal together to form something Mei could not identify.

“Why were… How come--” Mei cleared her throat, dragging her eyes to meet Junkrat’s face which was now turned away from her. “Why were you so concerned about me on our last mission? During the cryofreeze that I had enabled, I mean.”

Junkrat didn’t skip a beat, “dunno. I mean, we’ve all had equipment malfunction on us before, yeah? Thought that was what was goin’ on.”

“Oh,” Mei’s gaze was locked on the rusting orange metal of Junkrat’s prosthetic. “Is that--?”

“Is that what happened to me arm? You betcha.” He wiggled his fingers, giggling lowly as if it had been a particularly pleasant memory. Mei’s stomach turned in sudden worry at the wellbeing of the lanky Junker.

“You have to be more careful,” she blurted. Junkrat turned to her in surprise, one eyebrow cocked in confusion.

“You worried about me?”

Mei’s hands were laced together, shaking gently. “I’m-- I’m worried about the wellbeing of all my teammates. We have to work together to accomplish our goals and there should not be anything to… to jeopardize that.” It sounded as fake as Mei thought it did. Of course she was worried about him, when wasn’t she?

Junkrat grunted, holding his metal hand out. “S’alright, yeah? Take a look, nothing’s wrong with me asides a few inches taken off from... miscalculations.” He grinned at the last word.

Mei’s hands unfurled from each other. She snaked trembling fingers out to run a light touch along the metal. It was cool under her fingertips, pleasant to touch and much smoother than she had thought it would be. Small nicks in the metal gave the prosthetic a pleasant texture, small imperfections that she lingered on. She felt her breathing hitch as he flexed his fingers, the pistons slowly working inside to accommodate the movement, something clicked. He turned his hand over, pulling it away slightly, fingers lingering over Mei’s smaller ones for just a moment.

She dared to look up then, through soft lashes. He was staring at her, jaw rigid, eyes burning and her heart hummed _._ His hair was tousled, the thick locks hanging askew over his face from leaning over for so long. He looked mussed and tired and it had never been more _attractive_ to her.

Junkrat’s arm twitched. His chest felt tight from the idea that Mei’s fingers were so close to his skin, spread over the bright metal of his arm and yet… he couldn’t feel her. The warmth that radiated from her eluded him and the closeness she had to him at this moment made his teeth itch. He ground his jaw, staring at the woman whose touch would have been so gentle across his flesh but was wasted on cold metal. He searched her face, expecting a look of fear, of disgust at his recklessness, but found none. And when she gazed at him, timidly, shyly, he felt his lungs struggle for air so suddenly that his body felt weak.

He grabbed her then, the mechanical arm curling around her side, drawing her close. The other snagged the thick fur of her collar and lifted her slightly. His lips crashed to hers, teeth clinking in the desperation. Mei gave a small gasp, eyes wide.

She felt as though her heart had rocketed from her chest and left a searing hole that seeped a fire into her limbs by way of her veins. She _burned._ He tasted like oil and soot, a thick mix of chemicals singed her senses. She tasted something, something sweet that wasn’t the remnants of the sugary boba tea. He tasted like panic. He tasted like relief and gratitude and something Mei could not quite put her finger on. His desperation to make her understand without words translated into the awkward force of the kiss and she understood it. She did, but just as she began to relax he pulled away abruptly.

 **_Shit_ ** . She hadn’t kissed back. She hadn’t and Junkrat felt as though his chest was being squeezed. **_You bloody fucking fool. She’s gonna kill ya, mate, no doubt about it._ ** He braced himself for it too, gathering his shoulders up and tensing for the smack across his face, the shrill pitch of her voice. But she stayed as he had left her, mouth parted, eyes wide. He would have laughed at her if he didn’t feel so sick with anxiety. She looked as though she had just short circuited.

He was staring at her, brow furrowed in confusion as though he wasn’t too sure about what just occurred, either. A nervous titter bubbled in his throat and spilled out, too loud in the sudden quiet. He met her gaze, briefly, and it was questioning, worried, asking her to respond to the situation at hand. Mei stayed frozen, however, her fingers finding her lips.

She was dazed, she felt like she was floating. Her heart thrummed with fluttering beats in her chest. She wanted to move forward, give him a sign that it was okay, but she found herself rooted to the spot, staring dumbly.

“Right,” he rocked back on his heel, running his hand through his hair. Another laugh shot from him but it sounded forced, strangled. As though he was trying to ease his nervousness. He backed away from her, a sloppy grin plastering over his face. “Looks like that favor’s repaid, yeah? All repaid. S’all good, mate. Don’t need to worry about that one anymore. Shoulda asked. Sorry ‘bout that bit.” His throat cleared awkwardly and he stumbled backwards. “I, uh--”

The words were stuck in his throat. Junkrat sucked in a breath through clenched teeth, and nodded. He was staring at her, begging silently that she’d glance at him, smile, laugh, _anything!_ But she didn’t. Her fingers were held fast to her lips and her eyes were focused on the ground, round as the small ‘o’ her mouth had dropped into.

His fingers scrambled across the workbench, snagging the clump of metal he had been working on. He shoved it in his pocket and tapped two fingers to his temple in a quick salute. “Pleasure doin’ business with ya.” He scrambled out of the room, his hand clenched around the device in his pocket.

 

* * *

 

“Fuck, mate. What’d I do that for?” He groaned, limping as quickly as he could towards his room. “ _Shit!”_

He’d kissed her. Like an idiot and without asking. The thought churned in his stomach as he replayed the motions in his head. No matter how many times he looked at it, she hadn’t kissed him back. He hadn’t even asked permission, he chided himself for the carelessness of her boundaries. He had just charged in like a _fucking wanker_ and swept her up.

“She’s gonna hate ya,” he growled to himself. He slammed the butt of his palm into his forehead twice, face scrunched. “She’s gonna hate ya and you’re a bloody _fool.”_

He hurried towards his destination, muttering dark curses to himself and scowling. When he got to the room, he slammed the door behind him and leaned into it heavily. “Roadie, mate, I fucked up.”

Roadhog had been seated on the grimy sofa, running a dirty rag over his hook. When Junkrat entered the mask raised and now it was poised in his direction, only his soft breathing audible from it.

“What did you do.”

“Kissed her, Hog. _Kissed her._ No warnin’ or nothing just went in like rutting arse and _kissed her_.”

Roadhog set the hook down on his lap. He was silent for a moment, tensing slightly at the information. “She say anything?”

“Nothing, mate. Nothing at all.” Another groan and Junkrat’s hand came back up to his face.

A low rumble started from Roadhog’s mask. Soft at first but it built in volume quickly and he threw his head back. Junkrat realized he was laughing. His face screwed up in anger and he grabbed the nearest thing-- a ball of dirty clothes-- and chucked it at his friend.

“S’not the time to be having a laugh at me, Hog!”

Roadhog swatted the item away and leaned in towards Junkrat, his breathing heavy as though he was trying to contain his mirth. “What are you going to do?”

“Dunno. Hide. Never see her again, probably.”

Another growling laugh. Junkrat hissed at him. He waved a massive hand at Junkrat, shaking his head. “Talk to her.”

Junkrat’s eyes swiveled wildly towards his companion, “and say _bloody what?_ ‘Yeah, sorry I invaded your personal space but I was just takin’ the piss outta ya, still mates, right?’.”

“Be serious.”

“Rippa, Hog. Real great advice.” Junkrat ‘tsked’ and leaned his weight back into the door, swallowing. “Fuckin’ fantastic.”

 

* * *

 

Mei dwelled on the kiss for the next few days. Junkrat was nowhere to be seen and she was just a bit grateful for it. Everytime she thought of him, his molten gaze locked on her face, lips crushing against her own, she felt dizzy. It didn’t help that the thought of running into him sucked the air from her lungs and made her giddy.

It was odd, battling with herself over feelings she knew she had but refused to fully accept. It didn’t register until she saw him next. Skulking in the corner of her vision. She snapped her head to him and he froze. He had been in the corner of the kitchen at odd hours, trying to sneak a bag of chips out the side door. Mei had been dozing off at the table, slumped over a cup of tea that had gone cold.

The acrid smell of oil and singed hair roused her from her drowsy state (along with the not so subtle crinkling of the bag of chips). Her heart jumped into her throat when she saw him. She gripped the mug tight, her cheeks warming. He seemed to be just as surprised, his grip on the bag tightening. They said nothing to each other, just stared.

Mei cleared her throat and lowered her eyes back to her tea. When she raised them again he was gone. She felt a pang at her heart. He had been so keen on avoiding her, she realized. No wonder she hadn’t seen him for the past few days. She sniffed, fingers tightening around her tea. She sipped it, realized how cold it was and stood up to dump it down the sink.

\--

 

She crawled into bed around 4 that evening, only meaning to nap, but as soon as she laid down the sluggish call of sleep vanished from her. Instead she was kept awake by the nagging fury of Junkrat’s deliberate evasion of her.

 **_How dare he,_ ** she thought, getting angrier by the second. Avoiding her? He wasn’t in grade school, he wasn’t a child and neither was she! Mei fumed, sitting up in her bed and chewing on her lip. **_You’d think he had have some sort of_ ** **manners!** She grabbed the edge of her comforter and ripped it off, slamming her feet on the floor and pacing her room. Snowball beeped in surprise.

“Sorry,” she muttered, plopping down in her chair. “He is an idiot. How is it not obvious--! Why does he…?” Her eyes narrowed. These were questions for Junkrat himself. She stood again, eliciting another beep from Snowball.

“I will be right back,” she stormed from her room, slamming the door behind her. She was barefoot and jacketless and the cold bit at her arms but she barely registered it. She was _angry._ Dwelling on the fact that Junkrat had kissed her and absolutely ignored it had vaulted her straight from her bed and on a hunt for the unfortunate Junker. She was going to get answers.

She was lost in her thoughts, picking bitterly through her words as she decided on what to say to him. She didn’t notice when she took too many turns, down a swerving hallway, past dark buildings, until she stopped. She didn’t know where she was.

She had been on such a rampage to find the lanky Junker that it had taken her to a part of the compound that looked unused. She sat then, the anger bubbling into a frustrated ball in her throat. Tears pricked her eyes and she wiped them away furiously, scolding herself for crying. **_Why,_ ** she thought, **_why is he avoiding me?_ **

A hiccup was the telltale sign of the tears that were to follow. Soon enough, they rolled down her cheeks. Her chest felt tight, the weight of emotion was too much to bear. It was an accumulation of her confusion, her hurt and personal evasion of her romantic feelings and the looming responsibility to the organization she was apart of. It mixed in a turmoil of emotions, spilling from her chest and wrapping her in a hazy state of anguish and she curled up, burying her face into her knees and hiccuping soft sobs into her leggings.

She felt alone. As much as she remembered her friends, the people she knew before the _incident_ , she felt the rift between them. It was scary to feel so utterly abandoned. The family she had known locked away for those months at the Ecological Watchpoint in Antarctica they were all… gone. The people she had known, gotten close to and shared her life with. All gone. The time where she never felt alone. It was _gone._ Here she was, plunged into a new world, it felt like. A world where the constant call to be courageous and brave, to _protect_ , echoed in her ears each day.

The memory of her friends drew fresh sobs from her throat and she felt as though her heart was pouring from her. As many times as she rubbed her arms across her eyes, they didn’t stop the tears.  

She didn’t hear the heavy, even footfalls when they drew close. She only felt the warmth, a hand sprawling over her back, an arm wrapping under her legs and lifting her off the ground. She gasped, momentarily stunned by the suddenness of it. She wasn’t sure who it was and she craned her neck, squinting through her tears and the smudge of her glasses.

“Roadhog?” She whispered.

He grunted, his grip tightening on her as he walked forward with her. She felt so tiny in his arms. Her sobs quelled to small hiccups, eyes raw from the tears. She nestled her head into his neck, her gaze locked on the massive hand cupping her legs.

“How did you know where I was?”

“Didn’t. Heard you crying.” The rumble of his voice reverberated through her and she shivered with embarrassment.

“I’m sorry if I worried you--”

“Shut up.” Another grunt. “Sorry, didn’t mean that. Not used to talking with others besides ‘rat.”

The ball in Mei’s throat tightened again when she heard his name. She was reminded of the reason she was lost in the first place and she hiccuped again, fresh tears spilling down her face. “M’sorry,” she muttered, pushing her glasses up to rub at her eyes, “I c-can’t seem to stop. Silly.”

Roadhog stopped then, his arms shifting to hold her better. He lowered himself slowly, sitting gently on the edge of a low cement wall, Mei still curled in his arms. A hand left her, reaching back to his mask to unclip the lower buckle and he pushed it halfway up his face, dark eyes locked on her.

“Why are you crying?”

“Oh,” Mei swallowed a sob and shoved her glasses back on her head, clearing her face of her bangs. “I don’t really know.”

“Pigshit.”

Mei felt the corners of her mouth tug upwards. He wasn’t the best at comfort but he knew when to call things. “Lots of reasons,” she tried again.

“Hm,” His thumb came up, brushing her cheek clear of the wetness. She leaned into the gentle touch, eyes closing.

He kept his hand there, cradling her face as she relaxed. Her hiccups subsided gently and she stirred when they were gone, opening her eyes to look at him. His breathing stumbled when she met his gaze. Her eyes were red, puffy and sad from the crying, nose pink and cheeks even pinker. Yet she was still _gorgeous._ Her hair hung in messy strands, sticking awkwardly from behind the position of her glasses. The rest of it was down, thick chocolate locks hanging around her shoulders, tickling the top of his hand. They sat in silence for a few moments, breathing steadying between the both of them.

“Alright?” Roadhog’s voice was always a pleasant surprise outside of his mask, low and smooth as opposed to how the mask filtered it.

“Yes.”

  
He withdrew his hand and replaced it at the dip of her legs, standing with her in his arms once more and resuming their walk back to familiar hallways. She didn’t mind staying in his arms. She didn't even mind that her feet were numb from the cold. The rest of her was unbearably warm.


	12. Your Heart is a Home

Roadhog had been a welcome comfort in her time of need. He deposited her outside her room and gave her a final nod, staying for a moment longer to buckle his  mask back into place before leaving.  Mei watched him go, her heart churning in her chest. She felt happy he had been there for her. That he had found her when he did and that she was able to spend time with him. The memory of his fingers on her cheek tingled on her skin and she placed her fingers to the area, sighing. 

There was no doubt about it. Her heart raced around the Junkers.

Junkrat was a different problem entirely. Speaking terms were nowhere within Mei’s range. Everytime she thought about him her heart sank into an icy pool of anxiety and she had difficulty breathing. She wanted to see him, sure. But her pride decided it was better if he rot in his own stew of whatever emotions he had. The hurt was replaced with anger and she huffed, waving the thought of him away. 

Still… She recalled the way his lips fit so well against hers, the pure emotion poured into the kiss. Her skin prickled and her throat tightened, threatening her breathing once more. She had to do something, she knew, but she was still furious. So for the time being she would fume.

She turned to her room, opening the door slowly and walking in. The sun’s rays were clinging desperately to each surface as it sank in the horizon. Mei’s room overlooked the cliffs of the Gibraltar base and she stood at her window, mesmerized by the crashing waves.

**_How very similar to the situation at hand,_ ** she thought, leaning against the cooling glass,  **_the anger of the sea is justified._ **

* * *

 

Roadhog hadn’t gotten the thought of Mei’s pink face out of his memory just yet. The way her eyes were swollen from crying, the hiccup of her voice, the softness that she… She just was. He stormed straight into the room, reached into the bed and dragged a struggling and shrieking Junkrat out from under the covers. 

“Apologize.”

“Hog, what? Fucks sake, mate--” 

“ _ Apologize. _ ”

Junkrat sucked in a low breath, muttering a string of curses. “Mei?” 

“Found her crying.” 

Junkrat’s eyes shot to Roadhog’s mask. He looked pained, worried. Regret accented his sharp features. “Was it cause a’me?” 

Roadhog stayed silent, his great form swelling with each controlled breath. His hand shot out suddenly, grabbing Junkrat by the throat. “ _ Apologize. Now. _ ” 

Junkrat’s eyes bulged, hands scrabbling at the thick fingers, “yeah!” He wheezed. Roadhog let him go. He dropped, rubbing his throat gingerly and shooting his companion a dirty look. “I’m going.”

He sucked in a breath, as if to prepare himself for the feat he was about to undertake, and with the familiar click of his leg against the floor, he was gone. 

\-- 

The walk to Mei’s room was fraught with concern and anxious muttering. Junkrat didn't know what to say to her. He supposed an apology would start things off, but then again he was never the best at apologies. They never seemed to come out right, like most of the things he seemed to say. He would try. He would try because the twinge of regret and anger at himself for being the potential cause of her tears was eating him from the inside out. He would try because the softness of her lips made his heart sing when they had brushed against his. He would try because he wanted to see her smile at him again. He would try because Roadhog terrified the hell out of him.

His knuckles rapped sharply on the door and he withdrew, breathing quickly, trying to calm his burning chest. 

The door was pulled open slowly. Mei’s soft face peeked around the corner of it. When she saw him, her eyebrows shot up, folded in confusion and then pinched in anger and she slammed the door. 

“Shit,” he murmured, raising a hand to drag it down his face. 

He tried again and this time Mei wrenched the door open, standing in front of him with her hand on her hip. Boy, was she angry. Her hair was tousled, brown strands framing her face. Her cheeks were pink from the cold, eyes clearing but still swollen (Junkrat’s gut twisted at the sight of them) from crying. She was mussed, sleepy and brimming with an anger Junkrat could taste on his tongue. 

“What do you want!” 

“Uh,” she was glaring at him so intently he felt what little strength that possessed him to knock on her door sap from him. “I--” 

She moved to slam the door again. He placed his hand on it and her eyes snapped to the unwelcome obstruction, narrowing. 

He withdrew it quickly, as though her stare had burned it. “I-I-I’ve come to apologize.”

Mei blinked. 

“Wasn’t really right of me to go ahead and, ah--” 

“Kiss me.” 

“Yeah, s’what I did, innit?” Junkrat sucked in a sharp breath through gritted teeth. “Kiss ya. Without permission granted. Specifically by you.” 

Mei’s brow knit in confusion again. “Why would you be concerned about that?” It was honorable, sure, but also the farthest thing Mei was angry about.

Junkrat paused, “that’s what you’re mad about, right?” 

“No!” 

“Aw, fuck.”

“I am...” Mei mused over her words, chewing her lip, “flattered that that is your first response. But that isn’t what I’m mad about.” 

“What is it?” He looked desperate. He ran a hand through his hair nervously, biting gently on the inner walls of his cheek. His amber eyes were wide in confusion. He had straightened up a bit, the lithe form of his frame granted him a height that was not reached when he was hunched over.

Mei stayed silent for a moment, her eyes were locked on the dull grey paint of her door. She chewed on her thumbnail, eyes finding Junkrat’s when she decided on her words. “You kissed me. Then avoided me as though it had been a mistake.” 

Junkrat's face fell, eyes softening in a sudden understanding. “It wasn't--”

Mei cut him off, her hand tightening around her grip on the doorknob. “Let me finish!” She drew herself up taller and Junkrat felt as though he wanted to kiss her again. She was so  _ fiery  _ when she was angry. Akin to a firework, an _explosion_ of feeling. “I do not like feeling like a mistake! I didn’t understand! Was it a joke to you? Were you messing around with me? Taking advantage of the fact that I--” she cut herself off, lips thinning into a straight line, her voice started again, soft and whispery, eyes avoiding his face, “that I care about you?” 

Junkrat gaped at her. Had he heard that right? He stuck a finger in his ear comically and wiggled it a bit, “sorry, repeat that one more time? Coulda sworn you said y’mighta cared ‘bout me. S’not right though, is it? You?  _ Me? _ ” 

Mei wasn’t amused. Her eyes were dark, lips puckered in a pout, brow drawn together. Roadhog’s voice echoed in Junkrat’s head:  _ Be serious. _ He grimaced and drew in a breath. His heart was hammering against his ribs. He took a cautious step towards Mei. “Do you really?” 

Mei looked him up and down, as if scrutinizing him to see if he were worthy of answer. She stayed silent a while, jaw clenching and unclenching. Junkrat fidgeted, fingering the harness at his chest. 

“Yes.” She said finally.

A grin broke out on his face. Silly, sloppy and wide. He bubbled with joy, his heart felt as though it was fluttering from him. Mei blinked in surprise, tilting her head at him. He gave a manic giggle and straightened, both his hands gripping the thick locks of his hair. 

“Can’t believe this, mate. Can’t bloody believe it.” He was pacing, a short bark of laughter jumped from him and he stopped to stare at Mei. Another cackle broke out and Mei was starting to get worried. Was he okay? 

“Junkrat?” 

He whirled around to her and loped forward, his eyes alight with a fire she had not seen before. He towered over her, his form swallowing her in his shadow. She swallowed and craned her neck up to him, eyes wide.

“ _ Me?”  _ He breathed. 

Mei was taken aback. She had barely confessed her feelings for him, just barely, and he was so giddy, alight with a sudden life. Her hand reached out, touching his arm gingerly and he shivered at her touch. Her heart was in her throat, daring to cut off the flow of oxygen to her brain and lungs. He was so  _ warm.  _ The heat radiated from him, engulfing her entirely in its mugginess and she found herself relaxing, her eyes traveling the span of his shoulders. The harness took up most of them, the fabric thick and coarse against his tanned skin. Mei swore she could make out a smattering of freckles under it and her mind whirled to the first night they had met. Freckles, yes. They dappled his skin all over under that soot. Across his cheeks and nose, down his neck, over his chest. She drew in a shaky breath, aware that the man before her was intently staring at her. 

Finally, she found her words. “You and Roadhog. I would--”  _ I would do everything in my power to keep you safe.  _ “I would like see that you are well cared for and safe. So yes, I care for you. We're friends.”

He knew. He  _ knew.  _ Mei was sure of it, sure that he could see right through her thin layer of nonchalance and that he was edging her towards the breaking point just for the fun of it. She was sure that he saw the way her cheeks flushed, the way she seemed to lose her ability to breathe normally when he got close. As inept as he was with social situations, she was sure he could feel the tenderness behind her touches and how she lingered her eyes on his lips. 

Junkrat, however, did not know. He drank her words in, brow furrowing. Her kindness towards him was welcome, when she would give it. But how she phrased her response, the delicate pauses she took around each letter, as though dancing around something, made something in his stomach twist. He couldn’t put his finger on it. She had said  _ friends.  _ Nothing more. The kiss was a memory that whisked into a nothingness of emotion. He straightened, the light from behind him falling on her face once more and he gazed down at each detail. She held her head towards him, brown eyes glittering with a color akin to safety, to  _ home _ . He felt at ease around her, no longer looking constantly over his shoulder at the next danger. She was truly a  _ beauty _ and it took all he had to not bury his face into her neck, wrap his arms around her and hold her close to drink in the life he knew she emanated. She seemed to glow in the sun, a halo of light brightening each strand of chocolate brown hair and he wanted to bury his hands in it, pull her in close. But he stayed still, hands clenched into fists, fighting himself silently.

“Friends.” He muttered. “Right, yeah. I can get behind that. Teammates.” Mei watched the brightness drain from him and it hurt her chest.

His grin was forced and Mei could tell. The way his lips curled a little too far as though he was baring his fangs. She swallowed and nodded slowly, thinking on her words.  _ Friends.  _

She wanted more than that, clearly, but her throat had closed around the words she dared to speak. He stepped back and the heat that had engulfed her seemed to tear away with him. Her hands flexed, picking at the seams of her leggings. 

She didn’t want him to go. As he turned away, she screamed at herself to call after him, ask him to stay and talk to her for a little longer. She opened her mouth, a strangled “Junkrat?” dripping from her lips.

He stopped, turning partway towards her. “Eh?” 

“Wh-What is your real name?” 

He seemed to ponder over it, eyes dropping to the ground and unfocusing as though he was lost in thought. Finally he jerked his head up, “Jamison.”  
  
Mei breathed out a breath she did not know she had been holding. The time to ask him to stay had passed. She watched him disappear down the corridor.


	13. Stay Close

There was still a rift between them. Repaired for only that moment when Mei had lowly confessed her feelings but then torn once again when she had uttered ‘ _friends’._ She scolded herself for it too, the words had been out of her mouth before she could stop them. Ushered forth by a fear of rejection, perhaps? Maybe, but they were stupid nonetheless.

She would see them now, standing together at the meetings that were called for their ever growing cause. But the enthusiasm that Junkrat had once shown her in his waves seemed muted. He wave at her when she prompted it with a smile, but his attention would turn back to Roadhog or whatever occupied the room at the time.

Mei’s stomach rolled in knots. She didn’t like this feeling but she supposed she had brought it upon herself. She was lost in thought, hands clasped together on the table in front of her, eyes locked on the flat surface. Her gear was spread over it, organized neatly.

They had just been in the middle of a meeting about their next mission. A pickup of an EMP generator, wired by Talon themselves, something that would be potentially harmful due to its enormous output of power if it was reclaimed by their opponents. Mei, Junkrat, Roadhog, Lucio, Pharah and Tracer were to keep it protected until backup arrived to escort it safely from the streets of King’s Row. Mei mulled over the mission details, picking through them in her head and dreading the flight there. 6 hours, Winston had said, 6 hours stuck on a flight. The longest one yet that Mei was to be conscious for.

On top of the jitters of being in an enclosed space with the Junkers, her nerves were a mess. She had been tinkering with Snowball the past few days, trying to establish a stronger connection between them and the tank that held the cryoliquid. Snowball beeped at her, nestling safely into the groove of the tank and Mei’s head snapped towards the clock. 30 minutes till departure. She shimmied into her gear, clicking the straps snugly over her coat and shifting the hose that connected to her gun on her hip. With that, she left her room, her heart racing.

 

* * *

 

 

The ride had not been as uncomfortable as she first thought it would be. Tracer and Lucio did a good job at distracting her with jokes and conversation, which turned into a punfest and from there Mei came out the winner. Junkrat and Roadhog had taken seats far from the main group and Mei could feel the loom of Roadhog’s mask in their direction, confirming it only when she would turn periodically to glance at them. Her heart would spike in speed and a faltering smile tugged at her lips. Roadhog gave her a thumbs up. Junkrat didn’t look at her, however, and decided to tinker with a notebook spread over his lap.

They touched down sometime later and Mei was, as usual, the first to hop from her seat. Tracer delayed them only a couple minutes to hook everyone’s earpieces up and they were off. The sun hung low in the sky, washing the streets with an eerie light that lengthened the crawling shadows. The first thing Mei noticed was how barren the city was. Graffiti and other such vandalism tagged the walls, _BOTS STAY UNDERGROUND_ and _BLOOD AND BONE NOT OIL AND CIRCUITS._ She felt a twinge in her stomach. The hate and anger seemed to waft like a stale air around the streets. She padded to keep up with the team, deciding it was better to keep her eyes on the cobblestones.

Their destination was lit a blinking green on their map and the group dodged through winding alleyways, cautious of the potential call of danger around each corner. Tracer would zip forward, head swiveling, guns raised, before nodding at the group and waving them in. They would scamper forward to the next place and Mei began to feel the strain in her legs from the running.

It was when they were almost there that they ran into trouble. A few men, swathed in the black garb of Talon operatives, blocked their path. They were pacing, fingers held aloft at their holstered guns, eyes scanning the area. One or two would mutter something low into their earpiece and continue. Patrollers. They didn’t pack much of a punch combatwise but their eyes were quick and their friends that were undoubtedly lurking closer to the payload even quicker.

Tracer sucked in a breath. “Alright, we haven’t got long. Didn’t expect them to set up so soon but they musta been waitin’ for us. So, we split up, Junkrat, Lucio and Mei get to the point. Roadhog, Pharah and I will be the distraction. We won’t have much time, loves, so we gotta do this quick n’ fast!”

A nod ran throughout the team.

“Good. Alright, big guy it’s you and me first. We gotta`cause a big enough row that it’ll get the rest of their friends up and runnin’ at us. Pharah? You know what to do.” Tracer nodded at her and she gave a small salute, smiling under her helmet. “Defense team, as soon as the way’s clear slip around. We’ll meet you there! Be safe.”

Tracer’s harness hummed a steady blue as she zipped out. Mei heard her shrill voice, _Betcha didn’t see this comin’!_ Before the chatter of her guns disrupted the thick silence. Roadhog lumbered after her, his hook sailing through the air. Pharah was the last to break off. She muttered a small ‘stay safe’ before vaulting into the air with a boost of her jetpack. She hovered, arm outstretched and firing off small volleys of rockets in a direction Mei could not see anymore.

She inhaled shakily and nodded at the other two, sneaking off in the direction that had been previously guarded. The sounds of gunfire and the low shouts of the operatives, desperately trying to alert their companions was seemingly drowned out by the expanse of thick brick walls that stretched along the alley. Perhaps it was the steady thrum of Mei’s own heart pounding in her ears. She carried on, the swiftness brought to her by Lucio’s device was a marvel in its own. It propelled them down the streets at a steady pace, faster than their normal gait.

The pathway wound them through a building, its doors open to the public at an hour and Mei decided it might have been a church. The vacancy that met its welcome was an eerie thing to experience and she shivered as she walked through it, feeling very out of place. They rounded on their objective, the bristle of anticipation of a fight running through the team. Junkrat’s grin curled over his lips once more as he shoved a basket of cherry bombs into his makeshift grenade launcher. He moved off to the side, making for the stairs, and Mei wanted to stop him. Tell him to stay together. **_Stay where I can protect you._ ** But she didn’t, figuring he had his own ideas of how to contribute to the situation and let him wander.

Lucio stayed by her, craning his neck to watch Junkrat lop up the stairs. He gave Mei a worried glance. “It doesn’t work if I can’t see him. Does he know that?”

Mei stared after Junkrat. “I don’t think he cares.” She sniffed and jerked her head towards the point. “Let’s go, we have a job to do!” With that she bounded forward, out of the building and into the clearing.

They had rounded on their enemies, flanking them without notice and now they had the advantage. Mei’s gun gave a steady crack as the icicles shot from the maw of it and buried themselves into any unfortunate agent that crossed her path. Lucio dashed along them, hopping along the walls, his skates humming with life as they clicked over the stone. His modified gun burst with energy, knocking a few of them back into each other and he whooped, flicking the rhythms back and forth from his songs.

Mei’s eyes scanned the battle. Tracer and the others were still pinned on one side of the wall, making do with their side. Occasionally she would pop into the clearing, give Mei a grin and disappear again in a blink. Right now they were distracting, keeping everyone busy so no more backup could be called. It was working quite well, too, as they seemed to be dwindling their numbers down.

It wasn’t until the familiar pop of cherry bombs seemed to vanish from her ears that she realized something was off. She swiveled around, eyes searching the balconies for Junkrat. Nowhere. The cackles of laughter she had been aware of each time a _pop_ of one of his bombs had hit a target were silent. Mei broke away, knowing full well the remainder of her team was entirely capable of handling the rest of the battle by themselves.

She ran into the building they had earlier dispersed from and made a frantic dash up the stairs. Where was he? Her gun was held aloft, finger hovering on the trigger in case of any immediate danger. The hallways of the second story twisted along, peppered with the occasional door. Mei swallowed. It was silent. That wasn’t a good sign.

“Junkrat?” She hissed, padding along the carpeted floors. No answer. Her heart skipped a beat. “Junkrat!” She tried again. Again, nothing. Panic seeped into her veins. She picked up speed, calling his name one last time.

This time a strangled, “Mei?” answered her.

She threw herself against one of the balcony doors and it swung open loosely. Junkrat’s form was crumpled in the corner of the outside rooftop, clutching at his arm. His weapon was thrown on the floor, bombs rolling from the chamber. He was breathing hard, sucking in pained whines that twisted Mei’s heart.

“Oh,” she gasped, dashing to him. “Oh, no.”

“I’m okay, I’m okay,” blood bathed his upper arm, seeping through the fingers he had wrapped around the wound. “Stupid of me. Wasn’t watching the hubbub. Got a bullet to th’arm as a right nasty wake up call.”

Mei ripped off one of her mittens with her teeth, holding it fast in her mouth and reaching out with a shaking hand to inspect it. “Let me see.”

He pried bloody fingers away. The bullet had buried itself into the bicep of his arm. She felt around it, breathing just as heavily as he was. He winced at her touch and gave a whimper that pulled at Mei’s heart. She didn’t like that sound.

“Alright,” she breathed, she pressed her mitten into his hand. “Press this to it. It will soak up some of the blood. Keep it tight, too.”

He stared at her. “Y’sure? What about--?” He nodded to her other hand, still covered by the remaining glove.

Mei’s brow knitted, and she stared at him incredulously. “Is that really what you’re worried about in a time like this? _Do it_!”

He complied, eyes wide. Mei straightened in front of him and pressed a hand to her earpiece. “Junkrat is hurt. How long do we have?”

Tracers voice replied, tinny from the gunfire. “Not long! Should be here soon. How bad is he?”

“I’m still kickin’, mate. Be right as rain in a minute.” He muttered. Mei narrowed her eyes at him.

“He is fine from what I can tell but I’m also not a medic.”  

“Your best bet for staying out of trouble is posting up where you are. I know that’s not much to go on but -- _whoa!--_ better safe than sorry!”

Mei sighed. She was right, she knew. But the idea of staying in one spot made her stomach turn. They were easier to shoot down, if found. But with Junkrat hurt, she didn’t want to risk moving. He had other plans, it seemed, as he stirred from his position. He made a move to get up but Mei’s ungloved hand grabbed his uninjured side and pushed him down.

“What do you think you’re _doing?_ ”

“I’m still alive, ain’t I? Gotta get in the fight, gotta be useful.”

“You aren’t much use to anyone right now, please stay still!”

“Let me up! I can still spit the bloody bombs at ‘em!”

Mei almost laughed but a pained grunt from the Junker snuffed the humor. “I won’t let you pass out from blood loss because you decided to hurl explosives at them with your teeth, Junkrat.”

He relented under her touch, his amber gaze falling on her. “Yeah,” he murmured, eyes flitting over her features, “yeah, alright.”

Mei gave a sigh of relief. She relaxed, if only for a second because the low sound of even footfalls made her seize up again. Junkrat’s eyes flicked to hers.

“Someone’s here,” she whispered.

He nodded, straightening himself as best he could. Mei was on her feet in an instant, gun aimed at the door she had come through just a few minutes prior. The footsteps stopped. There was a silence that Mei could almost taste. The thick air hung around the duo, seeming to crush down on them.

A smoke, opaque and unnatural, drifted from the doorway. Mei had seen it before, back during their last mission and the feeling of claws wrapped around her throat, crushing her windpipe, surfaced. She gasped, her finger squeezing the trigger of her gun. An icicle shot through the substance, leaving nothing. It curled before them, swirling upwards and solidifying into the vague shape of a man.

“What do you want?” She growled. Junkrat had never seen her like this. He stared up at the back of her shoulders and felt a warmth flush into his chest. His hand crept to unlatch his grenades and he leaned out past Mei a bit, trying to see their attacker.

He wore a white mask, reminiscent of a skull or a bird, Junkrat couldn’t tell which. His body was wrapped in black, a heavy cloak swung about him, menacing looking shotguns were holstered at his hips and Junkrat eyed them warily. Mei planted her feet in front of Junkrat and steadied her shoulders.

“Ah, _mi pequeña gatita,_ we meet again.” The man-- Mei remembered his name to Reaper-- took a step towards her. She jerked her gun to his mask and he snarled at her. “That will do nothing. Give up now, _gatita_ . You and your _ráton._ I’ll make it quick.”

Mei’s eyes glinted behind her glasses. She squeezed the trigger of her gun and shot a spear of ice directly at Reaper. He sidestepped, clearly irritated at her stubbornness. She did it again and he growled, ducking it.

“Stop struggling.” Reaper breathed, the low growl of his mask filtered his words, “You’re making me angry. Keep this up and I’ll start with your little friend there. Do you think he’d scream--” The icicle buried itself in his shoulder. Reaper stumbled backwards with a grunt and sucked in a breath. His mask tilted, looking at the spear that protruded from just below the edge of his collarbone.

Mei was sure that with the way this man was able to disperse his physical form and regather it, the icicle wouldn’t do much harm. It seemed to be an annoyance to him because he advanced and she let loose a second one, hands steadying the gun. It whizzed past his mask.

“You won’t hurt him,” she hissed. “I won’t miss with the next one.”

Reaper paused, his mask was leveled on Mei and she felt a chill skitter down her spine. She was mustering up a courage she wasn’t sure she really felt but the thought of Junkrat injured behind her brought her shoulders up and straightened her spine. She would protect him.

With a decisive hiss, Reaper melted into smoke. “I will find you again, _gatita._ ” He crept away, the tendrils of fog drifting out of sight.

Mei gave a sigh and turned to Junkrat. He was staring at her, his bloodied fingers wrapped firmly around one of his grenades. He pushed it back into the straps of his harness now and Mei dropped to her knees in front of him, pushing the mitten back over the wound. He winced a bit, his eyes falling on her face once more.

“You protected me.” Mei felt her face heat up under his gaze.

“Yes.”

“Coulda done it myself y’know.” Junkrat’s grin curled his lips. Mei met his eyes, her own lips parting into a soft smile. “He’da been in for a surprise. I don’t go down so easy.”

“I know, I don’t doubt that.”

They shared a pleasant silence after that. Mei’s fingers pushed the bloodied cloth on the wound, trying to staunch the blood flow. Junkrat’s eyes never left her, seemingly unaware of the pain.

The familiar gait of Roadhog drew the both of them from their silence. They turned when he found them, huddled in the corner of the balcony and Mei smiled. She was relieved to see him and it seemed Junkrat was too because that familiar grin spread over his lips when he saw his companion.

“‘Bout time, mate!” Junkrat straightened, his eyes bright.

Roadhog lumbered over, mask moving from Mei’s hands pressing against Junkrat’s arm to Junkrat’s grin. A great hand reached out to muss the smaller man’s hair. Junkrat’s eyes closed and he hummed behind his teeth. Mei felt a twinge of jealousy and she wasn’t sure if it was because Junkrat seemed so happy at Roadhog’s comforting touch or because Roadhog was giving the attention to Junkrat. She steadied her hands on his arm, her cheeks heating.

“What happened?”

Junkrat’s eyes narrowed. “That bloody fuckwit-- what’s his name? Reaper?” Mei nodded. “Tried to take a cheap shot, mate. Mei got ‘em though. Had him cryin’ back to whatever hole he crawled himself outta. ” Junkrat flashed her a grin. She blushed. 

Roadhog’s mask turned to her and she went even redder. She felt her breathing hitch as she watched the hand that had rested on Junkrat’s head just a moment before drift to her. His fingers brushed her cheek, burying themselves into her hair. He mussed it a bit, just as he had done to Junkrat. She stared up at him, eyes wide. Junkrat’s eyes darted back and forth from Roadhog to Mei, his chest bubbling with heat.

After a moment, Roadhog withdrew and Mei felt her heart seemingly decompress. She sighed, her body visibly slouching, his touch had seized her into a statue and her heart felt as though it was going to burst. Junkrat’s mouth twitched, his eyes locked on Roadhog.

“Backup’s here,” Roadhog reached down to scoop Junkrat (who shrieked in pain when his was shoulder moved, Mei's chest felt tight) into his arms , “let’s go.”

Backup came in the form of Winston, Mercy, Reinhardt and McCree. Mercy found the trio easily, commending Mei’s quickness to respond to her fallen teammate. She patched him up as best she could, bathing him in the golden glow of her staff before nodding at Roadhog to carry him back to the aircraft. Mei followed them closely, eyes locked on the tousled blond hair leaning against Roadhog’s arm.

“Will he be okay?” She asked Mercy.

Mercy watched her, eyes glittering. “Yes. We will need to extract the bullet on the ride back, but he will be just fine.” The medic flicked her gaze after them, then back down to Mei whose eyes had never left the Junkers. “You worry for him?”

Mei went pink. She met Mercy’s gaze with a stutter. Mercy patted her shoulder, a knowing smile placating Mei’s trouble with answering. “It is alright. I understand that very well, Mei.”

  
Mei could have sworn then that Mercy’s eyes drifted to Pharah for just a moment. But she dipped her head and hurried towards the aircraft after the Junkers, escaping any more scrutiny into her love life.


	14. With a Love Painted Gold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright so, I recommend listening to You Already Know by Bombay Bicycle Club because it's a good song for this chapter.
> 
> Also, If you're wondering what I envision an unmasked Roadhog to look like: [this artist portrays it very well](http://yummidraws.tumblr.com/tagged/unmasked-roadhog).  
> (You'll need that mental image for this chapter).

Mei had had enough of her week. The library was her sanctuary, rows of books piled high on the walls, the musty smell of old paper hung in the air like a permanent fragrance. She loved it. She curled herself into an armchair and propped her book open on her lap. She was having trouble focusing on the words, her mind ran rampant to the last mission. She had watched Junkrat’s “surgery”, his pained groans twisted her gut as Mercy dug into the wound with her surgical supplies, extracting the bullet. He fell into a fevered sleep after that, leaning against Mei and she had slipped her hand around his uninjured arm, squeezing ever so slightly with each bout of turbulence. His fingers had pressed themselves against hers and her heart skyrocketed in her chest.

Of course, it wasn’t something he was going to remember. It was definitely something Mei recalled. Each detail hounded her. The feeling of warmth against her palm tingled even now and she swallowed gently, blinking back the memory. Her eyes fell on the the book before her, trying desperately to soak in the meaning of each sentence.

 

_“But I don’t want to go among mad people," Alice remarked._

_"Oh, you can’t help that," said the Cat: "we’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad."_

_"How do you know I’m mad?" said Alice._

_"You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn’t have come here.”_

 

Mei scoffed, pushing the book further down her legs and smiling to herself. **_How appropriate,_ ** she thought to herself. She adjusted her position, chin perching on her hand as she read.

The light outside dimmed as the hours crept by and the lights in the library flickered to life, drawn out by the darkening room. Mei, however didn’t notice. She was lost in her book. It wasn’t until the door to the library creaked open that she jumped, the book leaping from her lap and plopping on the floor.

A great figure filled the doorway, breathing softly in small rumbles. Mei gripped her chest, eyes wide in recovery of her fright.

“Roadhog,” she sighed, relaxing, “hello.”

He grunted at her and lumbered into the room, shutting the door behind him. She leaned over her folded legs, plucking the book from the floor and gazed at him over the rims of her glasses. She wasn’t sure if it would be rude to ask him what exactly he was doing here so she snuggled back into the armchair, heart beating a bit faster than before, and dropped her eyes to her book again.

She knew he occupied the library sometimes. She had seen him leaning back into the plush sofa across from the armchair she sat in now, a tiny cup of tea in his hands on more than one occasion. It had struck her amusing then, but now as he sat with the same cup, she merely smiled at him out of politeness. It was sweet, she thought, the way delicacy seemed to blend with his personality. Usually, their silence was cozy, something you could wrap yourself in and feel at home with. This time was different, her mind seemed to be ever aware of Roadhog’s presence, and as comfortable as she was with him, her heart beat against its confines. Mei stayed in her armchair, shifting ever so slightly each few minutes.

Finally she set her book down and pushed her glasses up with a scrunch of her nose. The question that lingered on her tongue found its way to him. “How is Junkrat?”

Roadhog shrugged. Not the answer she was expecting but she supposed it was better than him saying ‘bad’. She stretched her legs out, sighing loudly and slumped back into the armchair. Roadhog reached back, unclipping his mask and pushing it partway up his face to sip his tea. Mei’s eyes fastened on his mouth, the way the scar crossed over the thickest part of his lips and she was overcome with an urge to touch them.

She fought herself, fingers rubbing gently into the worn pages of her book. She shut it, swallowing, trying to regain her composure. It was a few minutes more till she found her voice but just as she did, Roadhog’s face raised to her. She sucked in a breath and averted her eyes, the small talk she was going to initiate lost on her tongue. He stayed there, his gaze hidden by the shadow of the mask but she felt his eyes burning into her.

Finally, he spoke. “Have some.” Mei glanced up at him. He was ushering the cup towards her. “Calms your nerves.”

She shifted, fidgeting with her pajama pants before pushing herself free of the armchair and walking to his sofa. She squeezed in next to him and he refilled the cup, setting it gently in her waiting palms. She stared at him as she sipped it, the mug radiating a pleasant heat into her hands. It was delicious. Chamomile and mint brewed to a exquisite perfection. She could taste both without either overpowering the other. A soft sigh dripped from her lips and Roadhog’s mouth twitched as though he were suppressing a smile.

“Thank you,” she murmured, taking another sip. She finished off the small mug with ease and gave it back to him. He filled it once more but set it down this time. They sat in silence, Mei’s fingers picked at the flannel of her pants. Her heart was racing in her chest. She leaned her cheek against his arm. Which, due to his girth wasn’t too hard as his bicep was basically hovering by her cheek the entire time. The movement made him stiffen.

She jerked away, thinking she had done something wrong. Perhaps he didn’t like to be touched without first initiating it? Her cheeks felt hot. She moved to leave, shifting her weight to floor but just as she did, his arm lifted. She felt it nestle around her shoulders with an incredible weight and pull her in close. Her face felt as though it was set aflame and she was pressed firmly into his side.

It was a few seconds that passed, but it felt like hours to Mei. She was gathering up her courage to move into a more comfortable position and when it brimmed she pushed turned herself into him, one arm sliding to lay on his bare chest. Her eyes journeyed to his face. He was staring straight ahead, his breathing soft. She could hear his heart thumping in his chest, sounding like cracks of thunder against his ribs. It dawned on her then that he was just as nervous as her and that alone puckered her courage and she moved again, pulling herself up into a sitting position.

Roadhog’s mask moved as she did, his face turning towards her. Without any further hesitation lest her courage abandon her, Mei launched herself forward. Her lips pressed softly to his, heart skipping precisely 3 beats before it seemed to restart in her chest with a speed that hurt her ribs. Roadhog’s hands were stiff against her sides but in just a moment, they softened and wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer. She reached up to push the mask back, the snout had been digging uncomfortably into her forehead and when she did they parted, just for a moment.

He pulled her in without hesitation, his fingers wrapping around her the back of her neck, cradling her head. He kissed her with such a gentleness that Mei felt herself melting into him. This was not like kissing Junkrat who had lunged at her with all teeth and wanton desperation. This was soft and daring. His free arm dragged her on top of him so she perched at his lap, legs folded to the side, her body twisted towards him. Her hands found their way to his neck as he leaned in to her and she felt as though his body could swallow her in its wake. He growled against her kiss as she pulled him closer, his fingers squeezing against her side and he pushed into her with a hunger that she didn’t reciprocate. She gasped and he froze.

“Sorry,” he muttered.

“No, it’s.. It’s okay. I just don’t think I can--”

“I know.”

He kissed her again, for a third time and her heart sparked. The forcefulness was gone, replaced with a tenderness that asked permission of her with each stroke of his lips. The thick tusk-like teeth at either end of his mouth were not such a hindrance to their affection as she had once thought they would be. His lips were soft, full and considerate against her own and she was grateful for it. Her hands pressed to each side of his face, thumbs running against the bristley scruff there. He pushed her down with his kiss, gently, into his arms and she laid back into them. The hand that was not cupping her head wrapped firmly around her back and rested at her outer thigh.

When he pulled back, the mask fell forward just a bit and Mei gave a short burst of laughter. That’s when she saw him smile. It pulled back at the corners of his lips, his face softened, eyes locked on her. She had never seen him like this and it thrilled her that she was witnessing it now. She struggled to draw in a breath.

“That was… better than the tea.” She whispered. He snorted, glancing over at the now cold tea.

She pulled him towards her, her hands stroking his jawline, only to stare at him. She wondered his name then, ‘Roadhog’ didn’t seem fitting for such an intimate moment and as though he read her mind, he closed the distance between them with a peck, the roughness of his scruff tickling her chin.

“Mako.”

She breathed out, eyes wide. “ _Mako.”_ She repeated.

He sighed at his name. Mei couldn’t help the soft grin that lifted her lips. He lifted her closer and pushed his face into the curve of her shoulder. The mask was rough and it scratched against Mei’s cheek but she didn’t mind. Her arms wrapped around his neck, her own face nuzzling into the side of his.

“Thank you.” She whispered into his ear. His grip around her tightened.

They stayed like that for some time. Roadhog was the one to break the embrace and Mei’s eyes fluttered open to stare at him. He lifted his head and Mei admired him from the new angle. The slant of his jaw, the thick bristle of his unshaved shadow, the slope of his cheeks and the thick, dark eyelashes. Her mouth puckered into a small ‘o’, eyes round. He glanced down at her and she felt her mouth go dry. They stayed in the library for what felt like hours. Mei nuzzled into Roadhog’s chest, eyes locked on his face, his arms snug around her. Eventually she fell asleep in his arms.

When she awoke she was tucked safely into the sofa, a blanket drawn gently over her. She sat up, blinking in the soft light filtering through the windows. It was morning. Slowly, her mind wound up, recalling the events of the night before and with each new memory, her face heated.

She had _kissed_ him _._ She gasped. He had kissed _back_! More than once, she was sure. Her memory was fuzzy. Her fingers touched her lips. She remembered the feeling of his face against her palms, the roughness of his unshaven jaw. The way his lips moved against her own, perfectly placed upon her mouth. A shiver stole its way up her spine and she swung her legs from the couch, pushing herself up to her feet.

Her stomach growled, begging for food and she relented, shuffling towards the kitchen with the blanket wrapped tight around her shoulders.

* * *

Junkrat couldn’t get the image of Mei’s face out of his head. The way Roadhog had pushed his fingers into her hair and tousled it. The way Mei was _staring_ at him. It stirred a vicious jealousy in his chest and he wasn’t sure who it was directed to.

Each time he saw her it was getting harder to deny the clawing sensation at his throat when she smiled. The warmth that burned in his heart and coursed freely through his veins when she would brush against him. 

There were times at night when he would close his eyes and he swore he could feel the warmth of her small hand in his. Where that sensation came from, he couldn’t say but it was welcome each time. He woke, his face buried in his pillow, legs wrapped around the cushiony middle. A groan pooled in his chest and he rolled over, realizing that the pillow was in fact a pillow and not the soft likeness of the woman he could not stop thinking about.

He bolted upright, running a hand over his face and reaching his other one out to pat Roadhog’s side. “Wake up, mate.”

Roadhog growled but Junkrat prodded him again. “Don’t have time for th’ bullshit, Hog. We got a real problem.”

“What.” Roadhog’s voice was groggy, thick with sleep.

“Dunno what t’do ‘bout her. She’s in my head, Hog. Can’t get rid of her.”

Roadhog was silent and Junkrat elbowed him for a response. Roadhog growled again. “Go talk to her.”

“You serious? And say bloody what?”

Roadhog rolled onto his back, his eyes narrowing. “You’re a fucking adult, Jamison. Figure it out.”

Junkrat hissed and let himself fall back down to the bed. He spread himself out over it, draping a leg across Roadhog’s closed ones. His stomach was twisting, heart dashing itself across the pathways of his ribs as he thought about her. He wasn’t entirely sure just why she preoccupied the forefront of his focus but he had a creeping feeling that he quashed with a shake of his head.

 **_Nah, s’no way._ ** His shoulders rolled and he sat up again, wiggling in his spot. Yet that same sensation boiled in his heart, that warmth that washed his fingertips in joy. As much as he denied it, it always came back to burn the pathways of his veins. He whined and squirmed again. The bed just wasn't comfortable. Roadhog grunted and pulled the sheets up further over himself.

“Go away, ‘rat.”

Junkrat sniffed and scooted himself out of bed, grabbing his prosthetics and making quick work of placing them on his stunted limbs. He stood, stretching, his bones popping as he reached towards the ceiling. He gave one last look at his companion, covered by the sheets in their shared bed, piled his equipment into his arms and walked out of the room.

Explosions. That’s always what made him feel better. He slung his harness on as he walked, shimmying into the straps and clipping them around his chest. This wasn’t a test run for new equipment, no, this was purely for fun. Well, he could certainly argue that even his test runs were purely for fun, as well. The sun perched in the sky, blaring down at Junkrat and he waved his fingers at it, squinting in the bright light.

“Oi,” he muttered, “gonna be hasslin’ me the entire time I’m out here, love?”

The sun was no stranger to him. In fact, she was a welcome friend in places that Junkrat found he knew no one but his bodyguard. She was a constant and it calmed him, gave him a sense of purpose. In the years in the outback, she became a fixation for him and he’d greet her like he would a lover.

She questioned him now, beating down on his neck as he clipped a few modifications to his mine. Junkrat straightened, sighing and rolling his head back. As he lumbered away from the thick plate of metal he had placed on the ground, his fingers twitching over the detonator, he gave the sun a wink and pressed the button. A light chirp followed by a small explosion clipped the silence, thick smoke poured from the mine and Junkrat’s brow furrowed.

“Gimme a mo’, yeah? That wasn’t supposed t’happen.” He told the sun. She was patient. She always was.

The beep of his explosive had caught Mei’s attention. She had been scooping mouthfuls of cereal up and when she heard the familiar rumble of one of Junkrat’s mines, she stepped onto the balcony of the kitchen. She could see him from there, just below the building, crouched over his bomb, his hand pinching his chin as he surveyed it.

He would tinker for a few moments, straighten and walk away a short distance and then try again. He did this three more times and Mei’s gaze was fixated on his every movement. The third time he stiffened, stood and then turned, his face tilting upwards. His eyes locked on her. She swallowed her bite a little too quickly and took to coughing. Her face flushed and she turned, patting her chest.

When the fit subsided, she glanced back at him. He was still watching her, a grin spread over his lips. He threw up a hand, still clutching the detonator, and wiggled his fingers at her. She waved back weakly, a smile tugging at one corner of her mouth.

  
When he turned away, she slipped back inside, still a healthy pink.


	15. A Mouthful of Blood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen to When U Love Somebody by The Fruit Bats for this chapter.

It was late afternoon when Mei returned to her room from the showers. She was dressed lightly as the day had warmed up towards noon, her wet hair hung in thick strands around her face. As she neared her door, she saw something posted on it. Which was odd,considering Winston never posted anything on their doors, he preferred to find give them documents in person. The closer she got, however, she realized that this certainly wasn’t a note from Winston.

It was a piece of paper, torn and stained and posted to her door with a sticky piece of tape. Chicken-scratch handwriting scrawled over the front of it: ‘ _training grounds after sundown’._ Mei’s head swiveled down her hallway as though she might catch the person who left this cryptic message. Of course nobody was present. She leaned towards it, snagging it from her door to study it.

A bright red smiley face was drawn in the corner, bits of other drawings etched the torn edges of the page, as if whoever did this had torn it straight from an instruction book. She felt a familiarity spark at the face and it took her a moment to place where she had seen that same grin that the sketch had. It struck her not a second later: _Junkrat_. Scrawled onto the bright red surfaces of his bombs, patched onto the fabric of his pants.

She felt her heart shoot into her throat and she sucked in a gentle breath. She felt giddy all of a sudden. Mei pushed open the door to her room, hanging up her wet towel with one hand, her eyes locked on the page.

What was he planning? Hopefully something safe. Mei glanced at the clock. Sundown was after 8 and it was currently 5:23. She fidgeted, plucking at her shorts and chewing on her lower lip. Should she go? What would happen if she didn’t? She amused herself with the possibility of denying his request but in her heart she knew she’d be there five minutes early.

* * *

 

She left as the sun sank over the horizon, deciding she’d stop to watch its descent as she walked. The colors washed the sky in hues of purples, pinks and yellows, blending and melding to make such a display that Mei stopped abruptly, mouth parted, to watch the sky. The clouds glittered in such an ethereal beauty, Mei regarded them in awe, a part of her wishing she could be up there to touch them. Of course, from a scientific perspective that was unheard of. Yet, she wanted to sink her fingers into the cottony texture and wrap herself in it, be apart of the extraordinary presentation of colors.

She stayed until the lights dimmed into darkness and she was left blinking for the light, eyes searching what seemed like a gray world after the sunset. She wished, silently, that she had such a power like the sun. Who seemed to dazzle even as it died behind the horizon, who left gleaming imprints in people’s eyes. She felt so plain, so simple. Mei sighed, turning towards the training grounds to begin her walk once more. The anxiety that came with the thought of being around Junkrat kickstarted her heart into a buzz and she slowed her steps, suddenly nervous.

Just why did he want her to go to the grounds? She trusted him in full, sure, but a part of her nagged. A part of her filled with doubt. Maybe it was a joke? Maybe he isn't even coming. She stood there for a few more minutes, fiddling with her hair, tucking it up into a tidy bun and even polishing her lenses. She shook herself, as if trying to fling off the anxiousness that latched onto her, and started forward again.

Junkrat, unsurprisingly, was not present. Mei breathed a low sigh of relief, she had been dreading catching him late. She didn’t like walking into an area that other people were already comfortable in and expecting her. So she perched herself on one of the benches that lined the flat, open area of the training ground and waited.

The training area had not been utilized as much as it was when the Gibraltar Overwatch base was still active. It saw a few people, here and there, mostly testing out equipment that would be otherwise dangerous indoors. Junkrat was perhaps the only one that visited it on a more regular basis than the rest. Scorch marks littered the ground, bits of twisted metal and casings of explosives were tucked away in cracks and corners. Mei kicked one from in front of her, glancing over at the way she had come.

It was a flat area, clear of obstruction, surrounded by buildings that the current team had abandoned due to the small amount of people that occupied the base. One building was enough for the most of them to live in. Some scattered to different hallways but none wanted to be this far. The grey stone that slabbed the floor was smooth--or, rather it had been before Junkrat had made this place a more frequent stop. Mei scuffed her boot on it, humming a soft tune.

The familiar _click, stomp_ of Junkrat’s gait echoed along the walled field and Mei’s head snapped up, heart suddenly racing. He bounded into view, holding a rather large box. She tilted her head and when he saw her he grinned, scuffling over faster to her.

Mei smiled at the sight of him, unable to help the bubbling feeling in her chest. “Hiya.”

He beamed back at her and her heart fluttered. “Ya made it!”

“Well, you invited me, didn’t you?”

“Well, yeah,” his brow knit and he leaned down to drop the box on the floor. It hit the ground with a heavy _boomf_. Mei wondered just how much stuff was in there. “Didn’t know if you were gonna show. Reckon I’d take the chance just in case.”

Junkrat scooted the box to the side with his prosthetic leg. His eyes flicked to her and she stared at him. His grin curled further on his lips.

“Junkrat--?”

“Oh, oh. It’s gonna be a _beauty._ Just sit back and relax, yeah? But--” He turned, his fingers pinching his lower lip, “do it over there.”

Mei tilted her head, her eyes following his finger. She raised an eyebrow but he answered her with his grin and she sighed. She gathered herself off the bench and walked out towards the middle of the training grounds and stood there awkwardly.

“What now?” She yelled.

“Lay down!” Came the response.

Mei stared at the ground. It was flat and hard, pure cement. With a grumble she sat heavily and then leaned back into it, grateful that her coat provided her with some cushion. She stayed there for a few minutes, wiggling against the floor. Just as she was about to lift her head to call to him, she heard his boot scuffing over the ground toward her.

“S’all rigged up,” his face popped into her peripheral. His tooth was glittering in the moonlight. She felt a shiver tingle her spine.

“Just what exactly is ‘it’?”

“You’ll see.

He plopped down next to her, his fingers wrapped around a detonator, but not one Mei had ever seen before. It had multiple buttons, each a different color. Scraps of tape were wrapped around the grip. He looked like he had scraped it together at the last second and it made Mei nervous. She hoped this was safe.

His thumb hovered over the first button and he lay back next to her, his body colliding with the rough ground. Mei wished she had brought a blanket. Junkrat turned his face towards her and she glanced at him, his grin ushering out a few jets of adrenaline. He smashed his thumb down on the switch and something rumbled in the direction of their feet. Mei curled herself up to see but Junkrat’s arm splayed out, perching against her collarbone and successfully pinning her down against the floor.

“Just wait,” he murmured.

The unmistakable whine of explosives whistled through the night air. Mei sucked in a breath, suddenly fearful that they would come down on her but she trusted Junkrat. Suddenly, the sky was alight with sparks of blue. They split the thick darkness with such a brilliance that Mei’s breath seemed to chase after them and she sucked it back in hurriedly, eyes wide. The deafening thunder came afterwards and Mei jumped against Junkrat’s arm.

His eyes slid to her, head tilting just a bit so he could see her reaction. The blue was reflected in her eyes, contrasting the brown of her pupils in such a fantastic way that Junkrat was mesmerized by her for just a moment. The light flashed over her features, etching the surprise, the fear and then… Her lips cracked into a smile so bright that Junkrat’s heart felt its light.

She gasped as the light showered over them, sprinkling the sky in new stars that fizzled out slowly. The next button was pressed and she jumped at the thunder again. Junkrat inched closer to her, withdrawing his arm to nestle it against hers.

Mei felt that one. Her cheeks rushed with pink and she was grateful for the darkness so that he couldn’t see just how much color he poured into her. She felt her fingers brush the back of his hand and her thoughts were pulled from the display in the sky above her and to the way the heat radiated from him. She trembled. Her eyes were locked on the fireworks as he sent off the third one, but her mouth was drawn tight.

Her fingers twitched against the back of his hand and Junkrat raised it ever so slightly, tucking her hand under his and pulling her palm flush against his own. Their fingers remained unlaced, pressed against each other chastely. Mei swallowed, growing unbearably hot.

The fourth button was pressed and neither of them were focused on the fireworks by then. Each of them felt the tightness of their own chests, their hearts pounding against their ribcages. Mei closed her eyes then, opening her mouth to draw in a calming breath.

 **_It’s true, isn’t it?_ ** she thought. Nothing more came to mind then as she turned her face towards his, only to find that his eyes were already exploring her face. She flicked her gaze over his face.

His mouth was parted, canines glinting in the low light. His brow was furrowed, as though he were intently focused on her, eyes locked only on her mouth. She flushed then, reaching deep for her voice.

“Junk-- _Jamison_?”

His eyes snapped to hers. His lips twitched, eyebrows jerking upwards as though his name was a surprise to him.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

“Ain’t done yet. Just wait for the last bit.”

His thumb pressed the final button. A thick volley of  lights splashed into color before Mei’s eyes and she gasped. A large snowflake, patterned by hues of blue and white, spidered across the night sky. It danced before her, sprinkling a twinkling stardust above them, melting towards earth with such a finale that Mei felt she wanted to cry. Her free hand came up, pushing against her lips.

When the last light fizzled from the black, she turned toward him slowly, eyes bright and shiny. He hadn’t moved from his position. When the final firework went off, he drank in her reaction, feeling his chest brim with satisfaction. She was reminiscent of the sun in those moments. The way her entire being positively _glowed_. She was beautiful and soft and when she turned to him, he smiled. A genuine smile. It captivated Mei and she wanted nothing more than to lay there and stare at it. It was better than the fireworks, in her opinion.

  
His fingers pressed bravely into the cracks of hers and she relented, gripping his hand tightly as they laced them together.


	16. When The Day Met The Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _When the[moon fell in love with the sun](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKKdy4ucD7Y), all was golden in the sky._

“Say it again,” He asked.

Mei’s eyes slid to the side. The duo had stayed where they were long after the final fireworks. The moon hung in the sky, shining brightly down on them as they counted the stars. The last few minutes had been filled with a heavy silence only broken by Junkrat’s request.

“Say what?”

“My name.”

“Junk--”

“No, not that one. Y’know the one I told ya.”

Mei’s face reddened and she wiggled next to him nervously. “Jamison?”

He barked a laugh and she narrowed her eyes at him. “What!”

“Nothing, nothing. S’just funny, is all. Haven’t really heard ‘Jamison’ in a while. Most blokes call me Jamie.”

Mei huffed and turned away from him, he tightened his grip on her hand when she did, as if squeezing an apology into her fingers. Her heart jumped. She felt as though the arm that was wrapped around Junkrat’s was a different limb entirely. It was burning with a heat that Mei wasn’t sure was because of Junkrat himself or her own embarrassment. Either way, when he scooted closer to her, pulling their grip out of the valley between them so he could press his hip against her, she felt the fire flare up again.

His skin, she noticed, had goosebumps on it. From the cold, she suspected with a rational mind, but a part of her hoped it was because he felt the same heat burning in his chest as she did.

“Are you cold?” She asked, her face dropping to the side to stare at him. He raised his eyebrows at her, gaze sliding to meet her own.

“Me n’ the night don’t really mix ‘round here. S’got too much of a bite to it.”

“I just need a yes or a no, Junkrat.”

He nodded sheepishly.

Mei sat up. Her hand unwound itself from his and she shimmied out of her jacket. It was large and plush, the inside lined with a light pelt of fur which she turned towards his chest and spread out over him. He stared at her incredulously, watching her snuggle back into his side after she was done. Her hand found its way back into his and he clasped it tightly, desperately, as though the time away from the warmth of her palm was an experience he preferred not to undergo again.

“Thanks,” he grunted.

“I have more of a tolerance to the cold. You?” Mei shook her head and giggled. “Not at all, it seems.”

Junkrat’s lips puckered in a mock pout. “Aw, you’re hurtin’ me pride, mate. But I’d wager that ya couldn’t last one day in the outback,” he plucked at the coat, “wrapped up in this? Nah. Not a single day.”

Mei laughed, rolling in towards him and burying her face in the ball of his shoulder. He was grinning down at her, eyes alight. She turned her face up to him, cheek resting against his arm.

“Well, with this,” she jabbed a finger to his side, taking a gibe at his thin form, and he jerked in response, yelping, “you wouldn’t last a day in the Antarctic!”

“Nothing lasts a day in the Antarctic, mate, that’s a given.”

“I did! I lasted--” Mei’s throat closed. She swallowed down a breath, tearing her mind from the path it wandered, “I lasted a while.”

Junkrat’s eyebrow cocked but he didn’t question it. Instead he turned his head back towards the sky, eyes searching the fields of stars. Mei felt the nervousness that eluded her until this moment come crashing back. Anxiety built up in her chest, making her fingers twitched over the flat of his hand. She recalled the night she had cemented the idea of _just friends_ into their relationship and it ate at her. She didn’t want just that. Something inside her called for him, pleaded that the hand in hers became something of a constant instead of a singular try at a chaste affection. She wanted to kiss him. But first, she had lingering words that begged to be heard, ones that kept threatening to spring past her clenched teeth. Her anxiousness wrestled with them, wrangling them back into submission on her tongue. The apprehension was becoming a hindrance to her communication.

Finally, she pried open her mouth, letting them free. “Jamison?” she began and his eyes fluttered as though he were rousing himself from a sleep. “Do you remember that time you came to my room? When I told you we were just friends?”

Junkrat shifted, his grip on her hand spasmed momentarily. “Mm, yeah.”

“I didn’t mean it how it sounded.”

Junkrat’s eyes narrowed, his mouth thinning into a line. “Whatcha mean?”

Mei swallowed, her hand tightened its grip on his. She could feel him trying to pull away from her and she scolded herself for being so poor with her words. “I don’t want to be your friend because--” _Because I like you._ “Because I--” _Come on! Just say it!_

Junkrat began to stir, his fingers slacking against hers. The defensiveness that he so casually let wall him off from the others, the wall that she had broken down, was starting to rebuild. Mei struggled with her words, her free hand coming to rest over his so that both of them cupped his own.

“Please, I’m.. I’m trying, please don’t go.”

Junkrat had drawn himself up into a sitting position, trying to shove a wedge between them. Mei had followed suit but hung to his hand and he stared down at their fingers that were laced together, Mei desperately trying to keep him from leaving. He nodded, assuring his stay.

“Whenever you--,” Mei shook her head, as if to clear it. _Try again._ “I can’t seem…” _No, that wasn’t the right way to start it off either._ “I just…” She winced, her gaze locked on the floor. “I’m... “ Her throat felt tight, her face hot. _He’s going to leave, just say it._ “I’m sorry. The words--”

Junkrat was staring at her with such an intensity it felt as though her insides were turning to mush. Mei’s focus wandered elsewhere as she tried to combat the rising heat of embarrassment. She noticed then he seemed cleaner than he usually did. She could see the freckles that littered his cheeks, the way they dappled over the curve of his features, and the moles that broke the flecked pattern. Her eyes fell to along the lines and angles of his visage, breath coming in soft gasps as she drank in his features. He was so _handsome._ Sharp as cut stone yet smooth at the same time. She dropped her gaze to his mouth, his lips were parted in anticipation of the words she had lost. She wanted nothing more than to crush her mouth to his at that moment, lose herself in the bliss that came with his kiss. Just as she lost herself in the thought of him and leaned forward, his mouth twisted into a smirk.

“I think I got it,” he bragged and his chest swelled with pride. Mei’s brows knit together as she shook herself from the hypnotized state she had put herself in. “Yep, definitely got it.”

“This is serious.”

“Oh, ho. Very serious.” Junkrat swiveled his body to face her, legs crossing neatly in front of him. “So serious that I’mma give it a go, yeah?”

Mei stared at him. “What?”

“Trust me.” That was a dangerous thing for him to ask.

“...Okay.”

He took his arm from hers, his face was pinched in an exaggerated expression as he focused on his thoughts. Mei was nervous, unsure of what he thought she had been trying to do. She desperately hoped he was on the same page as her. He sucked in a breath, his smirk never leaving his face.

“You’re the moon, ain’t you? That’s what you’ve been tryna tell me.”

Mei blinked, suddenly lost. Whatever she had expected, it wasn’t that. “What?”

“Thought you was like the sun but you’re too quiet for that. S’no wonder I didn’t understand you much. Bloke like me? Doesn’t do me any favors to prod about in the dark. But you’re always around, no matter what. Guidin’ any poor fella that’s lost himself out there.”

Mei swallowed, her cheeks burning. He saw her confusion and tried to explain his reasoning.

“You’re all ice n’ bitey but you’ve got a warmth about ya. It's not real apparent at first but it shows," He gestured upwards, towards the brightness in the sky, "Makes it a bit hard t’breathe sometimes, mind you. It's not something you expect and that’s sayin’ a lot, mate, cos I’ve got enough experience with hot weather to last me ages.”

Mei felt a giggle bubble from her throat and she leaned back, to let it out. Junkrat stared at her. She was _laughing._ At him? He fidgeted in front of her, suddenly feeling too vulnerable to any potential jeers and jabs. She didn’t say anything of the likes, however. Instead she shook her head, her giggles subsiding slowly.

“I think I know what you mean. Thank you for the compliments, but let me try again.” She let herself relax. Her gaze was locked on the ground, too nervous to meet his. “It sounds just plain silly, but I don’t have any other words for it. I wanted to say that I-- I do like you, Jamison. That’s why-- I don’t really know why I said I wanted to _just_ be friends. I-I mean I do? Want to be friends that is. But I don't...?” Mei huffed, her words came out jumbled and cut off, their meaning straining to run further than her voice allowed them to. She prayed she got her message across.

When he didn’t say anything for the first few seconds, she felt her heart spike and her face redden. Had she been reading everything wrong? His hand holding, the kind words-- She sucked in a breath and steadied herself. Her eyes rose to meet his, only to find that he was staring at her, brow knit, as though he was trying to figure out what exactly she had said.

“Y’like me?” He whispered, “No joke?” The thought was almost cruel. His heart was singing, chest tight. Yet something told him not to give in to the feeling just yet so he sank his fingers into it, hoping that this was not some hoax meant to shatter him. But then: she nodded.

Junkrat drew a breath in through clenched teeth, feeling the joy wash over him. His heart felt as though it was going to burst. He leaned back, letting out a whoop and Mei jumped. He was grinning, hands splayed towards the sky as he fell back with a thud against the ground. A laugh broke free from his chest.

Mei buried her burning face in her hands, embarrassed beyond relief. He cackled again and she shot her hand out, whacking his stomach to stop his ridiculous display. A warmth reverberated from her fingertips, crawling along the skin of her arm and washing itself down her throat into her stomach.

He sat back up, grinning at her and she tilted her head, staring at him. The smile faded gradually as they sat together, replaced by parted lips that told her he was thinking as hard as he could. His gaze bounced around her features, resting finally on her lips. She was mesmerized by the color of his pupils, how they burned so fiercely against the white.

“So, y’don’t think I’m a-- what was it you called me? A bully?” He purred.

“Oh, you are. But I’ve found better things to hope for in you.”

Junkrat felt the warmth wash over him with her words. He stared at her, his brow creasing and smoothing in a gentle confusion. He leaned in towards her, soaking up as much closeness as he could. His eyes were focused on her mouth. He slid on arm behind her, steading it against the ground so he hovered over her. Even sitting down, he had a terrible height advantage. Mei’s eyes were round and bright as she watched him get closer, her own hands shaking as one sprawled over his chest, her body moving to nestle into the crook made by his.

This time, she would not make her mistake twice. Her other hand found his face and sprawled over the smooth skin, fingers cupping his jaw. A buzzing demand for his affection hummed on her lips. She closed the distance, mouth pushing to his. Her heart sent sparks flying into the snug cove of her chest. He was so gentle with her this time, his lips seemed to nestle so perfectly against her own. She felt as though she was melting under his mouth.

It bewildered him that she had allowed him to grant her this. His heart beat painfully against his ribs, as though aching to leap out and run to her. His hands twitched, reaching slowly to brush her sides. He rested them at her waist, waiting for a sign, anything that would allow him to continue. She wiggled closer to him and his heart thrummed, sending rolling waves of pleasant electricity through his veins. The heat trickled into him by way of her touch. Each place she set her fingertips on his skin seemed to elicit such a reaction inside him that he shivered against her.

She drew back, eyes searching his face. “Are you okay?” She whispered, eyes bright.

“Yeah,” he breathed, “yeah.” He was more than okay.

He pulled her in then, spurred on by her concern, his arms wrapping firmly about her. They lifted her and plopped her into his lap, on top of her jacket that lay forgotten in his legs. She squeaked at the movement. It sent a burst of joy through him to have her this close after merely dreaming about it for _weeks._ He nestled his face into her neck. God, was she _beautiful._ Her arms laid themselves across his shoulders, her fingers tangling into his hair. He breathed her in, one hand splayed out over her lower back, the other tucked into the curve of her waist.

Oh, he was _happy._ He didn’t know the last time his heart felt a thrill like this. The smell of mint and roses lingered in his nostrils as he pulled back from her. She immediately tugged him in for another kiss and he sighed happily, nuzzling his lips against her own.

And Mei? Mei was lost in him from the moment the kiss began. She soaked in his affection, honored by just how gentle he was trying to be. There was silence between them, the only sound was the soft breaths that each stole from the other after they parted.

Finally, Junkrat spoke, murmuring against her lips in the gentlest voice Mei had ever heard him use. “S’pose we royally fucked up that ‘just friends’ bit, ye?”

Mei scoffed and Junkrat snickered. “I prefer it this way,” she whispered back.

He sucked in a breath at her words, grinning against her mouth.

Around the time the two decided it was time to head back, the moon hung high in the sky, beaming down on the both of them. Junkrat tilted his head towards her, giving her a knowing wink when Mei was distracted. They gathered themselves from the floor, Mei slid into her jacket. She had offered it to Junkrat but he shook his head when she did.

“'m warm enough now.” He grinned.

His hand found hers once more, lacing their fingers tightly together. They walked in silence, Mei leaning against his side. Once or twice they stopped, necks craned to watch the stars as a few darted or fell across the inky blanket of night. Satellites or falling stars? Mei never knew.

They stopped for the last time when the hallways split, one veering off towards the direction of her room and the other to his. Junkrat tugged her, walking a few steps down the hallway in the direction of his quarters but she stopped, staring at him.

“Oh, come on,” he told her, “There’s enough room for you there.”

Mei smiled at him. Her stomach suddenly felt sick. She had nearly forgotten about Roadhog and what they had shared only a night before. Guilt washed over her in a hot wave and she shook her head. “I-I can’t.”

Junkrat’s brow knitted and it tugged at her heart. There was nothing she wanted more than to be nestled between Junkrat and Roadhog-- Jamison and Mako-- and feel the warmth of each of them on either side of her. But she hadn’t told Junkrat what she and his companion had shared.

Junkrat loosened his grip on her hand, his mouth bunching to the side in a pout. “Right, no. I getcha.” His fingers fell from hers and she swallowed, feeling the the sharp sting of regret in the back of her throat.

“Jun-- Jamie?” She called gently. He turned, eyebrows raised. Mei skittered forward, pushing herself on her tiptoes to plant a large kiss on his cheek. He grinned stupidly, his eyes misting over. “Good night!” She scurried off then, her cheeks reddening.

  
“G’night,” he murmured, watching her go. His fingers touched his cheek, trying to eternalize the feeling of her lips on his skin.


	17. The Start of Something

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am... so sorry my friends. I promise I'll start posting regularly! I couldn't seem to figure out how this story was going to progress but I think I have it now!

Perhaps it was the fact that she was tired. Mei always seemed to be tired, as of late. Nothing much interested her anymore, Snowball beeped tirelessly at her from their station and she waved them away, turning to push her face into the plush pillows on her bed.

“<Leave me be, I am fine.>” It was a damn lie. One that curdled in her stomach and ached her heart. She had said those words too many times today, trying to get through the motions of the day with a smile plastered on her lips. She had done well but Mercy, it was always Angela, had seen through the forced tilt of her lips and questioned her further.

“Have you been eating?” She had pressed and Mei nodded, feeling the rise of emotion ball into her throat. “Sleeping well?” Again, Mei nodded, feeling ever so guilty for the lie.

Mercy had frowned, her perfect brow creasing. “No, you have not been sleeping well. You’re not telling me the truth.”

Mei wanted to leave. She wanted to slip away, bury herself into her bed and stay there but she was forced to endure the rest of the badgering. She loved Angela, she did, but the ruthless peeling back of her personal feelings left her raw and tired. Finally, she let Mei go. On the verge of tears and breathing hard, Mei had dashed away to her room to fall fast asleep by midday.

Now she lay there, in the late afternoon, falling in and out of consciousness. A sharp rap at her door roused her from her depressive state and she sat up.

“<Who is that?>” She chirped in chinese before clearing her throat, “Oh, I mean-- Yes?”

No answer. Mei cautiously slid to her floor and padded over to the door, “Hello?”

“Sorry, I don’t mean to interrupt but I have something here for you,” the soft calm of Winston’s voice drifted through the closed door.

Mei groaned softly and leaned her forehead against the door. It’s not that she didn’t want to see him, just that she was unsure how well she would be able to hold up a professional attitude with such a low energy. She straightened nonetheless, feeling guilty at the flood of relief that this had not been a visit from a certain someone that her thoughts had been incessantly lingering on.

It’s not that she didn’t want to see Jamison (as that is what she had taken to calling him ever since the time they spent together), even now her heart perked in her chest, pumping faster at the thought of him like a ridiculously happy puppy. She had been avoiding him and Roadhog, unable to come to terms with the idea that she had kissed both of them in the span of 24 hours.

That one tore her up for the following days. She had spent a good chunk of the day dwelling on it; writing down how it made her feel in an unofficial confession. Each paper was shredded and balled and now sat in her wastebasket, taunting her.

After careful deliberation, she came to her conclusion that each of them held an equal place within her heart. They drew a pleasant warmth that curled itself around her skin and settled deep into her bones. Whenever they were present she felt safe, which wasn’t a word that was often used around the Junkers, and she felt _happy._ The problem in this case was: how would she tell each of them without losing the other?

The guilt was the second issue. It was eating at her, nagging her each moment she remembered their time spent together: _it will be your fault if they become angry._ She didn’t want to ruin their friendship, she didn’t want to ruin the relationship they had with her. Whatever that was.

“Mei?” came Winston’s voice again. “Are you there? I can-- I can come back at a later time if that’s preferable.”

Mei’s mouth twitched as she raised her head. She smoothed her shirt, as though that would perhaps save her appearance and quash any concern for her wellbeing. Her hand twisted the knob and she cracked the door open. “Hi, Winston. I'm sorry, I haven’t been feeling too well.”

Winston towered a few inches above her, his great figure blocked the hallway, filtering the light behind him. He stared at her, the same concern that had filled Mercy’s features just hours before trickled into his expression and Mei winced. She was sure she didn’t look all that well, dark bags had formed under her eyes, giving her a haunted appearance and the way her hair now looked--frazzled and unwashed, thick chocolate locks falling messily out of her usually tight bun-- was certainly an alarming difference to her usual visage.

He said nothing to her excuse, however and instead took to clearing his throat and dropping his eyes to the thick folder grasped in his fingers. “Athena found these,” he began, leaning back on his haunches so he could open the folder. “There’s still information locked away in the caches of our old bases that she’s slowly deciphering.” Winston rifled through the pages and Mei pushed herself up on her tiptoes, trying to peer over the top of the folder, “I know you asked for anything that related to the work you, uh, left behind. Well, I figured--”

Mei swallowed, eyes wide. She snatched the file from his hands and Winston stared at her, startled that she would do something so uncharacteristically Mei. She fingered each page, eyes scanning the words with renewed vigor. Her heart sped in her chest. Here it was. The familiar voice of the words written sent thrills through her and she glanced small paragraphs at the journal-like entries of data and information.

“This is it,” she breathed. “You have found it.”

The majority of the files that Mei’s team had compiled on the ecology and climate of the Antarctic (and a few other remote regions) had been entered into the databases of their Overwatch counterpart. After Mei’s accident and the fall of their organization, she had been resuscitated thinking that her work had been all but destroyed. Yet the proof, the undeniable physical proof of her time in the freezing temperatures of the South Pole was clutched desperately between her fingers.

She glanced up at Winston, her eyes shining. He was staring at her intently, brow creased in worry. Her work, the very thing she had poured her passion into, was here. She could continue it and it was all thanks to him. To her  _friend._

Her arms came up, wrapping around Winston’s neck and he gave a soft sound of surprise. Mei buried her face into his fur. “Thank you so much.”

He gave her an uncertain pat on the back. When they parted, his gaze followed the folder clutched tightly in her hands and he cleared his throat. “We can devote a small set of resources to furthering your research. It won’t be as much as we… as we used to have but I’ll see that it’s done.”

“What you have done is more than enough and I thank you for all your help and-- and any help you give me in the future.” Mei’s lips parted into a small smile.

Winston gave a small nod, his jowl twitching to bare a canine in a smile, “the world is worth fighting for, Mei. I know you’ll do the right thing.”

He left then and Mei shut the door slowly, leaning her forehead against it. She took just a moment to process what it was, what it all meant. She could start her projects again, in a much smaller scale, sure, but what mattered was that they were being _started_. She would have to begin her planning, outline missions and gather resources to begin. Mei fumbled with her hair, letting it loose from the failed bun.

A shower first, she’d decide the rest later.

 

\--

A small nook in the cafeteria was reserved for study time and planning. Mei had taken refuge here, a cup of hot coffee steaming next to a small plate of sweets. Papers were strewn over the table, falling haphazardly onto the bench beside it. She was scribbling furiously onto a couple of them, pausing only to nibble on the cap of her pen before continuing.

She stayed like this for hours, only murmuring to herself in Chinese. Her fingers twisted strands of hair around themselves absentmindedly and she took to nudging her glasses up further on the bridge of her nose. She only paused when Mercy took a pass by her table to ask if she was doing alright, Mei nodded, waving her friend away with a gentle “Yes, yes, I am fine!”

She stayed in the cafeteria well past dinner, only glancing up when the raucous laughter of Torbjorn and Reinhardt distracted her long enough from her studies. She gave them a gentle scowl, shoving her glasses further up on her face to emphasize her displeasure and nestled back down into her chair.

It was a daily routine the next few days. Looks between her teammates were exchanged when, for the third day in a row, she was found at ungodly hours, glued to the material at the table. Mercy was the one who finally pried her away, scolding her in her most motherly voice that she 'would strain every muscle in her head if she didn’t take breaks'. Mei agreed only because her work was nearly finished and her back felt awfully stiff.

She stretched in her chair, running a hand through the dark locks that had loosened from their tight hold. She pushed her glasses on top of her head and sighed, relishing in the small pops that her bones made.

“Sure looks like you’re set up for the day.”

Mei froze at the familiar voice. How long had it been since she had heard that voice? Days? She swallowed, carefully prying on eye open.

Junkrat was leaning against her table, his hand splayed out over a few of the pages that Mei had scribbled on. He was studying them, brow creased, his molten eyes flitting over her notes. Not that he could read them, she assumed, they were written in her native language. But he seemed to gaze at the writing as though he could and Mei felt her face heat up under the scrutiny.

He leaned his hips into the table, placing his weight firmly against it. When the papers were replaced on the flat surface, his eyes came to rest on Mei. She recoiled from her stretch, grateful that the blurriness of her vision stopped her from seeing the rest of him correctly because she could _smell_ him well enough.

“It’s-- Winston found my old research,” she began, reaching for some of the papers he had touched which were now streaked with grime. She shuffled them together and cleared her throat. Her face felt warm. “He has put together a small task team for me and told me that I could continue it!”

Junkrat’s eyes snapped to Mei’s. “That mean you’re leaving us?”

Mei blinked. He sounded... worried? His amber gaze was searching her face, eyes wide in a soft panic. She took a moment, leaning towards him, her fingers leaving the pile of papers in front of her and lying at a halfway distance to his hands. She shook her head slowly, her brow creasing at his troubled expression.

“No. I mean-- Well only for missions. They won’t be long, only a few months--”

“ _Months?_ What’s ya definition of ‘not long’, mate?”

“Well,” Mei’s gaze flicked back to the papers strewn on the table then up to Junkrat. “I used to be gone for years at a time. My last expedition lasted 3 years before--” She sucked in a breath, shaking her head. “It will be a matter of weeks. The longest one will be the first.”

Junkrat’s mouth twitched. He shuffled closer to her and she swallowed. Her glasses fell from her head, bumping down to lay a little too low on her nose. She didn’t fix them because Junkrat was so close, _dangerously_ close. Her eyes flicked to the empty cafeteria behind him. He stooped towards her and she sucked in a shaky breath.

She hadn’t noticed before how his eyelashes seemed to be so dark and thick. Long, too. Her hand pressed to his chest, fingers gliding over the soot caked skin, she could feel the grime paint layers onto her fingertips. His freckles were no longer visible under the dirt he had accumulated and Mei’s nose wrinkled the closer he got. He smelled awful.

He stopped, his breath washing gently over her face. “Somethin’ wrong?”

“You stink.” She whispered.

Junkrat withdrew so quickly that Mei felt as though she had hurt his feelings. Instead he grinned and ran a hand through his thick, blond locks. “Yeah, sorry ‘bout that. Didn’t much care for a bath this morning.” He stretched and Mei found her gaze following the curve of his body. His trousers seemed to sink dangerously low on his hips. She swallowed. “Was gonna go run one now, though.”

“I’ll join you.” The words were out before she could stop them. Junkrat froze, his brow arching. “I-I mean-- Oh, I mean that I could use a bath too. Not-- Not that I will be _with_ you in the bath. Just in the stall next to you. Bathing. Where I cannot see you.” She was growing redder by the second and Junkrat’s smirk was becoming unbearably cocky.

“Right,” his eyes flitted over her face. She was avoiding his gaze at all costs. “Right, yeah. I’ll meet ya there.”

He loped away after that, leaving Mei to suck in a shaky breath and groan softly at her awkwardness. After a few moments of recovery she gathered her work materials and tucked each paper back into their folder, taking care to smooth and brush each one.

 

\--

 

The walk to the bathing rooms was fraught with images that Mei desperately tried to push from her mind. Thoughts of Junkrat, dripping wet from a fresh shower, his hand drifting through his hair, a gentle smirk tugging at his lips-- She nearly stumbled over an uneven tile in the hallway. She clutched her towel tightly to her chest, scolding herself for becoming so distracted. Her robe fluttered around her ankles and she drew it closed just a bit more securely as she rounded the doorway to the baths.

The eternal mugginess of the bathhouse settled over her skin like a thick fog. She padded over the tiles, straining her ears for the sound of running water but found none. Perhaps he had already taken his bath? A sliver of her hoped he had not and she reddened at such a thought. So she set up at a stall, tucking her towel and change of pajamas onto the bench outside of the stall. Thankfully, the base provided such amenities as shampoo and conditioner but nonetheless Mei liked to bring her own. She unfurled them from the towel and pushed past the stall door, setting them on the shelf next to the shower head. Sighing, she tugged her robe off and hung that over the door.

A familiar clicking brought her attention away from the shower knobs. She peeked her head out of her stall momentarily to see a lanky Junkrat who had just walked in with a towel wrapped firmly around his waist. Mei reddened. She knew that the stalls were tall enough that he would not be able to see her but still she panicked, grabbing for her robe and pressing it to her front as he walked by her stall.

“Jamie?” She called. It was quite obviously him, but still, her voice came out soft and squeaky as though she was terribly unsure if this was the man she had expected to encounter.

“Yeah, it’s me.” He stopped outside of her stall, turning to hobble into the one adjacent to her.

Mei swallowed. She listened to him stumble his way into the stall. The telltale sound of metal scraping against tile told her that he was removing his prosthetics and Mei wondered just how he was able to balance without help. Then again, she decided that was none of her business and her face flushed with her rudeness and the thought of him undressing. Her robe replaced itself on the door.

 

She busied herself with turning the knobs, which squeaked to her touch, to the perfect temperature. The water pressure was often fussy but it pounded down on her scalp pleasantly now and she shivered in the small relief it granted her. Warmth washed itself over her back, trickling over her skin in such a calming manner that she allowed herself a small sigh.

“Sometimes I forget how calmin’ it is, y’know?”

Mei slicked her hair back from her face and sent a squinted look in Junkrat’s direction, through the wall. Was he going to talk the entire time they showered? But she couldn’t help herself and she entertained him with a response.

“Calming?”

“Yeah. Never much liked the bath part of bathing. But the water feels nice. Right n’ warm.”

“Yes, it’s also good for washing. Something you don’t seem to be familiar with.” She giggled.

“Oi, I wash! Just-- Not as often as you.”

“Mmm. Mhm.” Mei lathered shampoo into her hair, massaging her fingers into her scalp. “That I can tell. Or I guess I should say I can _smell._ ”

A grumble from his direction, Mei smirked. She heard the sound of the bottle of shampoo being patted against his hand and the clear image of his unclothed upper half, stretching back as his hands found their way into the thick, tousled locks of his wet hair flashed across her mind. She squeaked, nearly dropping her shampoo bottle.

“Everything alright in there?” His voice piped up.

“Ah, yes. Y-yes. I almost dropped my shampoo. It’s slippery.” She lied. Well, it wasn’t necessarily a lie as the bottle jumped from her hands at that moment and clattered to the floor. She leaned to pick it up, huffing at her clumsiness.

They washed in silence for the next few minutes. Mei was painfully aware of his presence next to her and as she frothed soapy bubbles into the palm of her hands. She felt her face heat up. Her hands felt foreign as they rubbed over soft skin and just for a split second, the image of Junkrat’s fingers, organic and not, pressing into the flesh of her sides flashed through her mind. She squeaked. Tearing her mind from such thoughts, she forced her focus on lathering the wash up and down her front and back. The perfumey scent of roses filled the air around her.

When the suds were rinsed and gone, she conditioned her hair quickly, feeling more and more embarrassed by the thick silence between them. She turned the squeaky knobs once more and the stream of water stopped abruptly, leaving only soft drips that echoed in her stall. From the adjacent one, the steady stream of Junkrat’s shower was still going.

Mei snagged the towel from the outside bench, rubbing her hair into the soft material and patting the rest of herself with the dry parts of the fabric. She shimmied into the pair of flannel pajama shorts and a loose tank top and shimmied into her robe. The rest of her belongings were tucked inside the wet towel and held under her arm.

The stream of water to Junkrat’s shower had stopped halfway through and he gave a soft grunt now. The clicking of metal was the only sound from his stall. Mei pushed her door open, pausing outside of his to give him a quick ‘goodbye!’ but deciding that that would perhaps be a bit weird.

“Mei! Wait.” She froze.

“Yes?” More grunting. A click and then a hiss of pain. Mei took a step towards his door. “Is-- Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah. No. Wait-- I got it.” Another hiss. “Shit, mate. Alright no. Do me a favor? Help me out here.”

Mei reddened. “What?”

“I can’t get this damn-- It’s hard t’do this with one hand, yeah? I just need some help n’ Hog ain’t here to do it.” There was a soft grinding of metal and Junkrat gave a yelp.

“Okay! Stop! I’m going in, please cover yourself!” Mei set her towel down and made a point to hover her hand over her eyes as she walked in.

“I’m not a bloody idiot, I know what calls for a little tact. Gimme some credit here, love.”

Mei peeked through her fingers. Sure enough, he was seated on the bench that most of the stalls came with. He had placed his towel over his lap and his organic fingers were wrapped around the orange metal of his prosthetic arm as he held it up. The angle was wrong, something was caught. Mei took a cautious step forward, tucking her hair behind her ear.

“Okay, I think--” with cautious fingers, she reached towards the lip of the metal and brought it away. The bandaging was just awful on his limb. She started there, unwrapping the dark material and rewrapping it with care. She tucked the loose end into a fold and lifted the arm again. It was much heavier than she expected it to be. Mei blinked, her eyes journeying up the curve of his shoulder. Muscles roped tautly over the bone there, shifting and coiling as he moved and she swallowed, dropping her gaze to the slope of his chest. She lifted the prosthetic and placed it correctly before securing it into place.

Junkrat flexed his hand, watching the mock, metallic tendons tighten and relax with each movement. Mei watched too, her fingers still fastened around his upper arm.

“Much better,” He straightened and Mei took a step back, clearing her throat. Junkrat stretched for the second prosthetic and Mei’s eyes snapped to the movement of his towel. It shifted ever so slightly, slithering down his waist and Mei sucked in a small breath, eyes wide. The dip of his hips into that ‘v’ shape was what triggered the blush. It bloomed over her face like a drop of ink in water until her cheeks were glowing. Junkrat did not notice. Or if he did, he said nothing but Mei could swear a smirk tugged at his lips.

With a voice a notch higher than usual, she announced she was leaving and dipped out of the stall.

“Oi, wait-- Mei! Where are you going? Wait up-- _Mei!_ Bloody--” The sound of scrambling limbs against tile resounded behind her. She slowed only when she heard a clunk of metal and a curse from Junkrat. He came crashing out of the stall, hand wrapped tightly around the towel at his waist and scurried after her.

“Wait, where y’going?”

“Back to my room, is that a problem?” She was pink in the face, glowing with embarrassment and Jamison paused, eyes wide, to stare at her.

“No, I mean-- Just haven’t seen ya in a few days.” He muttered and made a move to roll his shoulder back in a nervous tick. He dropped his gaze to the floor.

Mei softened, reaching up to tuck wet strands of her hair behind her ear. “I’m sorry. I know. I haven’t been the most social.”

Junkrat’s eyes sidled up Mei’s form, resting on her fingers as they dropped from her ear to her lips. She kept them there, touching idly at her lower lip. He traced their shape with his eyes, swallowing as they pressed into the soft flesh of her mouth.

Mei blinked, watching him visibly trail off from his line of thought. “Jamison?” She murmured, “Hello?”

He shook his head, tearing his gaze from her lips. “You’re leavin’ soon, aren’t you?”

Mei shifted her weight, clutching her robe tighter. “Yes, I think so.”

“Oh,” he was so close Mei could see the droplets of water clinging to the curve of his jaw. “Just-- Gonna miss you s’all. Hog will too. Much as he doesn't say it.”

Mei swallowed, her toes curled under her and she nodded slowly, a smile flickering over her lips. “I’m going to miss you too, Jamie.”

  
She jerked her head towards the door and Junkrat’s face lit up. He skipped to her side, a grin breaking out over his lips as he stared down at her. They walked in silence, Junkrat humming to himself and Mei’s fingers found the crook of his elbow where she held onto him tightly. Her heart ached. She was going to miss him a lot. Both of them.

**Author's Note:**

> Questions? Comments? Concerns? Let me know. I'm desperate.
> 
> Also! Come talk to me over at seafoamsorceress.tumblr.com about the ot3!


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